"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I'm south Indian, and Family is turnning against me with the changes, so now what?

Canadien

Don Juan
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As it stands, I wil be living with my parents until I finish my university, and I have turned my life completely around in last 8 months, 1 year ago I couldn't even make an eye contact with girls, I looked like typical geek or dork back then,

Now move forward to today, and you have completely new person and lifestyle, now, I get to interact with girls all the time, and I'm enjoying my life, as I take six different dance lessons, along with university and other stuff; now I also dress to impress, I try to be unique, not like everyone else, I enjoy talking about all the interesting things I do, especially about girls,. But my family is complete introvert and they don't want to see or hear about any of these, they want me to become good old nice guy, who would sit on the side looking for others approval and validation, so do I give them what they want or should I stand my ground..

How would you guys best handle the situation? what could I tell them to make them understand? is it better not to say anything? and just do my own thing>?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DJDamage

Master Don Juan
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Canadien said:
How would you guys best handle the situation? what could I tell them to make them understand? is it better not to say anything? and just do my own thing>?
There are things your parents don't need to know about your private life. Since you come from a conservative family you better not say anything. Just play the good old nice guy when you are at home and unleash the bad DJ you when you go out (think Batman, you are a normal guy by day but a superhero by night!). Of coarse this is a short term solution in which in the long run you need to just move out and live life the way you want to live it.
 

jophil28

Master Don Juan
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Canadien said:
they want me to become good old nice guy, who would sit on the side looking for others approval and validation, so do I give them what they want or should I stand my ground..

How would you guys best handle the situation? what could I tell them to make them understand? is it better not to say anything? and just do my own thing>?
Whenever a man starts to change from being directed and controlled by a woman ( your Mom in this case) to being self-propelled you can bet that somebody ain't gonna like it !
You are in a tough situation - I would explain to your parents that you feel that your " true personality" is emerging and that the old you is no longer operating.. You need to explain that the new YOU is busting through and you need to live your life in a way that FEELS right for you. Very traditional families think that they OWN you - forever. Thare was a reason for this in olden times. This enmeshment ensured the survival of the older members because they imposed an obligation on the younger members to feed and take care of the oldies on a daily basis.. Refrigeration changed that somewhat..

However, you should remember that your life belongs to you and nobody else.
Also accept that not everybody is going to like you for your new found independence.
 
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