"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

I'm sick of all the wannabes around here. ....fess up... are you really a Don Juan?

Are you a real Don Juan or just posing?

  • I am a Don Juan... I have no problems getting laid

    Votes: 35 34.0%
  • I'm a geek posing on an internet forum trying to be alpha in at least one part of my life

    Votes: 6 5.8%
  • I have never gotten laid.... i wonder what it's like?

    Votes: 16 15.5%
  • I would be lying to myself if i chose option #1

    Votes: 46 44.7%

  • Total voters
    103

The Bad Ass Canadian

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I want to know.

It's really easy to pose as one, and re-hash all the DJ bible stuff, and act like you're THE MAN (especially on an anonimous forum), but seriously...how many here really practice what they preach?

It seems many DJ's that i thought really had game, have... of late.... confessed to not being such big men, after all.

It really makes me wonder if the bulk of the advice we dish out here, is of any use.
Are we fooling ourselves?

I've kinda been experimenting with all the techniques that people preach on here, and to a point, they work.... but it seems like there is always something missing.


I've slept with 28 girls in my 25 yrs of existence, and most of them were GF's...

Only a half dozen were ONS.

The only real good advice that i can se working is AntiDump's Machine. I swear to everybody on here, that this stuff is solid. And.. the cool part about it is that it stresses doing your own thing and not even worrying about women.

That is the key.

Another thing I want to point out...


Looks really DO matter. Sorry top burst your bubble but, it's the truth. If they don't think you're hot...... you have no chance what so ever... regardless of your "game".


Let's discuss.


And don't bother flaming me, 'cause I really don't give a fvck. If you can't handle it, then you're even less of a man than you should be.

They say the truth hurts... well.... start counting your bruises.


The Bad Ass Canadian
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Lifeforce

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I have gone through many stages of DJism. I have laid 4 people this year and 1 of them is a FB. Not that much I know but I have not been out sarging so much, not from march to august. I was a virgin last year. However it should be noted I seek a GF more than ONS because ONS sex sucks.

At this moment I feel my game is going bad. I have changed my appearance so much, bulking up, changed clothing style, gotten tan etc... and I am unsure what kind of girl to aim for. The uglier ones have started to ignore me and the better looking girls are nice to me, but the average girls (the ones I aim for, who I felt was too nice to apprioach before) ignore me and/or are mean. I'm going a little higher though to see the response from the better looking girls. It's so unreal to approach those because those are the girls I used to dream about and I can't believe that I get interest from them.

But these last nights I have been shot down many times and my self confidence has gone to hell. **** blocking has been the worst thing and people busting in on the rapport building phase of the game. I'm changing right now and learning. I feel there is a huge difference in laying different girls, good looking and average.

I don't pretend to be a super-DJ because I am not. No, but I have transformed myself alot. I used to be called ugly from chicks now they look at me on the street. It's hard to accept such a change. Looks do really matter alot.

Also I am doing ADs machine, trying it out. (will be writing a post on this later) and I found some errors using it, among them is that few people tend to show interest in the street (were I try it out), so a lot of women who is dateable just doesn't flirt open like that. AD's machine is also more than useless in clubs and bars.

ADs machine helped me with one approach yesterday.

Me. "Good day *smiling*"
Her: "Good day *looking bored/spoiled*"
Me "*looking at her expression* Goodbye *walking away*"

Really fun :D
 

comic_relief

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Whats your definition?

I am in control of my life.

Why not just read my journal and decide for yourself my journal

That is your decision because I think I am a DJ but people who think that women are important will label me a KJ because I don't go after women as much. But since I got my license I bet that will change shortly:D

You Decide! What you think of me!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Here's a secret, DJ's never need to prove anything to anyone other than themself.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

The Bad Ass Canadian

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Here's a secret, DJ's never need to prove anything to anyone other than themself.
I agree 100%....


I am not trying to prove anything, with this thread. I'm simply trying to inject a dose of reality to some people here who are clearly deluded.


The Bad Ass Canadian
 

MrCode

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It could be argued that the journey to becoming a DJ (or more precisely the ideal man in our eyes) is a never ending one.

In my own case I'm further along than many in that my mindsets and beliefs are DJ, but I still have a need for experience to transform my beliefs into actions.
Looks really DO matter. Sorry top burst your bubble but, it's the truth. If they don't think you're hot...... you have no chance what so ever... regardless of your "game".
I don't claim to be a "full-fledged" DJ, and I could be wrong, but I think this statement of yours is flawed. Because what you seem to be saying here is "if you aren't good looking you won't get any women...so just give up now." That is just crap, and it is a defeatist attitude.

I've read too many stories and seen too many examples with my own eyes of hot women with average or ugly guys, and also of good looking guys getting shot down at clubs because their game sucked.

What about famous people? Donald Trump is goofy looking with a bad combover, yet he has had two hot wives and is currently seeing a supermodel. How does your "theory" explain that.

Now if you had said "you don't have a chance if the girl is not attracted to you", I would agree, because attractiveness is a combination of many factors: your looks, your demeanor, your money, your power, etc. Also keep in mind that "good looks" are also very subjective...one woman may think you are nasty where another finds you hot. Again other factors play a part in this, especially your attitude.
 

thebsharp

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Yea ofcourse looks do matter, but the great thing about this site is that not only they teach you about woman but also teach you how to be a better person, teaches you how to look good with tons of fashion advice. We even have a fitness forum. If you are ugly you can change yourselves, there are many formal ugly duckling on the boards. Take a look at dirtheart past and present picture, take a look at my present picture.

I agree with your post The Bad Ass Canadian but if you gonna post something like this, also give some positive insights too. Otherwise its useless, tell people that if you are ugly then you have no chance is egotistical and not very DJ like, after all... ad DJ always look to improve and not just lay down and die.
 

tom121

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Yeah I agree too many ****y nerds on the net
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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Originally posted by MrCode
It could be argued that the journey to becoming a DJ (or more precisely the ideal man in our eyes) is a never ending one.

In my own case I'm further along than many in that my mindsets and beliefs are DJ, but I still have a need for experience to transform my beliefs into actions.

I don't claim to be a "full-fledged" DJ, and I could be wrong, but I think this statement of yours is flawed. Because what you seem to be saying here is "if you aren't good looking you won't get any women...so just give up now." That is just crap, and it is a defeatist attitude.

I've read too many stories and seen too many examples with my own eyes of hot women with average or ugly guys, and also of good looking guys getting shot down at clubs because their game sucked.

What about famous people? Donald Trump is goofy looking with a bad combover, yet he has had two hot wives and is currently seeing a supermodel. How does your "theory" explain that.

Now if you had said "you don't have a chance if the girl is not attracted to you", I would agree, because attractiveness is a combination of many factors: your looks, your demeanor, your money, your power, etc. Also keep in mind that "good looks" are also very subjective...one woman may think you are nasty where another finds you hot. Again other factors play a part in this, especially your attitude.

Good points.

My attitude is not defeatist, but I hope you can see where I'm coming from.

She has to think you're hot from the get-go.... otherwise, no amount of "game" will woo her.

God bless sosuave for giving the average guy a chance to land some stellar women, but I still feel that some guys on here are deluded in what they can accomplish by using "tactics".

TheBsharp,


My initial post has very little insight, because I left it open for discussion.

I
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Giovanni Casanova

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Can I not be both a nerd AND "the man"?
 

MrCode

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Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
Good points.

My attitude is not defeatist, but I hope you can see where I'm coming from.

She has to think you're hot from the get-go.... otherwise, no amount of "game" will woo her.

God bless sosuave for giving the average guy a chance to land some stellar women, but I still feel that some guys on here are deluded in what they can accomplish by using "tactics".
OK, I totally see where you are coming from BAC. A lot of guys on here want quick fix solutions, that perfect "pick-up line" or weird conversation technique that will get a girl's panties wet. But sorry boys, that is just a pipe dream. Just like get-rich-quick schemes usually only work for the people who are selling the scheme (they should be called "get-me-rich-quick" schemes), the same applies to a lot of techniques. One thing that will work for one guy who has the right mindset may totally fail for you, if your mindset is not right.

In fact, if you have the right beliefs, mindset and attitude, just about any technique can work. But if you are an AFC on the inside trying to pull-off DJ techniques, nothing will work (of course you might get lucky now and then, but things won't happen consistently.)

The path to becoming a Don Juan starts from the inside.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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For someone who hasn't been here for long... all i can say is, "Welcome to the boards, Mr.Code!"

You obviously understand what I'm getting at. The quick fix idea is right on the money.


Let's try and put an end to techniques and tricks, and begin promoting a complete mindset. All the successful DJ's have already done this, and the newbies really need to understand what this mindset is.
 

jamesw82

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I'm not any of those...

I get laid for sure, but I have things I really need to work on that get in the way of me becoming a dj, im above afc, so i consider myself recovering... (RDJ)

I can speak to girls no problem, I do C&f no problem, Kino is a doddle, but where I let myself down is emotional attachment, I keep doing it :S

I don't therefore feel it is right for me to post on others topics, when I myself have issues that prohibit me from being an authority figure on the subject.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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I can speak to girls no problem, I do C&f no problem, Kino is a doddle, but where I let myself down is emotional attachment, I keep doing it :S
I too, am guilty of this.

It's really easy for me to get out and pick up a random chick, and screw her. I can do that, literally, every night of the week., when i want to. I screwed 4 different girls in 1 week, last month..... but to what end?

Every once in a while I bump into a girl that is 100% the type of girl I'm looking for. We seem to click very well...... this is where my problems start.

I have a real hard time not letting my emotions govern my actions. It is relationship suicide. By no means do I revert to my AFC ways, but I do mess things up, often.

The probelm is that I spend weeks on the road with my band so, when I am home and I am seeing a girl, I really would like to spend as much time as possible with her... in the short window that I have before we leave to go back on tour....

This of course comes off as a bit desperate, but in reality it isn't at all.

Things are getting better, but man... it really sucks to have a list of "The One's that Got Away":D


The Bad Ass Canadian
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

frivolousz21

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Hey BAC...good post. I know im not a DJ...but I am aspiring....and I know im becoming ever so close.

but when I came to this site..I realized I putmyself in a state of delusion.

I am 22 yrs old. I was a natural DJ my entire life till i lost my 3yr LTR at age 20 and I took on drinking 3 or 4 days a week..and smoking weed 2 or 3 times a day.

I thought when i came here i was a big loser. then I saw the stories and photos of alot of these guys..then I realized how lucky of a person I am...and what I was before has come out again.

but my origional point to this post was. all the major AFC;s looking for tips and tricks..didnt respond!

keep up the good posts
 

Tha Realnezz

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You can tell who has game and who doesn't just by reading the posts.


If a guy breaks out with a succesful FR in one post and then is crying about his sex-life the very next day obviously he's full of ****.

I mean,we can post pics of our hoes and there will be some haters and doubters it's the nature of the interenet .So just post,speak your mind and keep the flames to when your flamed.


If you can prove it...do it.If you have doubts about a guy..ignore him.
 

Alpine

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Is this too obvious or what.

Post a pre DJ forum picture of yourself and your HB3

Let's face it it's the relative improvement that's the key. Naturals and hunks may not be the best people to give advice, cos they don't know HOW they do it.

Then if you want to give advice you can show your credentials.

Your current picture and all the babes you've banged since following the faith.

I noticed Mr Hill had the balls to post a pic of his GF and got slated. Maybe this is why it's not more prevelant.

i'll shut up now because I'm still clueless, but I will return!


Cheers
 

Tha Realnezz

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Listen when you do this for awhile you lose your fear of rejection..Now read the first page closley 95% of the problems here lie in fear of women,rejection and lack of verbal game.


All basic ****.If your MDJ 1,000 post deep and claiming to be some sex-god you can't come on all wimpy and admit to having a fear of rejection ,man. That's simple-level 1-a **** and most cats still have that problem.
 

Giovanni Casanova

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Originally posted by Alpine
I noticed Mr Hill had the balls to post a pic of his GF and got slated. Maybe this is why it's not more prevelant.
Mr. Hill got slated more because his girlfriend was running around on him and screwing her housemate than because of her looks. Most comments on her looks were complimentary.

I wasn't even bagging on the girl's looks, just saying that she looked like a female version of that kid from Harry Potter.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

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