"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Im Scaring Myself

Industry

Senior Don Juan
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I've changed... and I've done it extremely quickly. I finally had a moment to sit and ponder about it and I freaked myself out! Who is this guy I've become? And how did I get there so quickly?

Before all of this I was a drunk. I had no ambition, responsibility, job or direction. My girlfriend of 1+ year left me for her ex and I was left standing in an empty field. I could of gone two ways... back where I was or drop everything I knew and start from scratch.

Well I chose the latter and started chipping away at my former self to build the person I wanted to be.

The first thing I did was completely stop drinking alcohol. I don't need it. All it did was empty my bank account, get me laid a few times and force me to spend the next day in bed. I threw out all my liquor and told myself I'd never drink again.

The second thing I did was get a job... any job. I needed something to hold me accountable. So I called my friend who's a business loan manager at Wells Fargo and he hooked me up with a sweet job on the spot. If I had only know it would of been that easy!

The third thing I did was get a new hobby. You could of called drinking my former hobby so I needed something constructive to replace it with. I decided to take up flying lessons and get my pilots license! I've already started and it's absolutely amazing. I suggest everyone go out and get one. You will feel like a new man. I already do.

The fourth thing I decided to do was workout on a consistent basis. I now go to the gym 3x a week... on top of playing softball and tennis 1x a week. It's only been a few weeks but I can feel the change.

The fifth thing I did was get some new clothes. I threw out a lot of my old stuff and went and got myself a new style of sorts.. nothing drastic but not what I was wearing before. The key is feeling comfortable with what you wear and I totally do.

My ex is still gone... with her ex and I couldn't care less. I hope she's happy... honestly. I tried to make everything work but it was a lost cause. She was already gone and just holding on to make sure he was there for good. If I would have realized that earlier I would have saved 2 months of my life trying to keep her. Live and learn I guess. But I wonder what she thinks of everything I've done. Does she even care? She is surely shocked as hell I would imagine.

---

So now I'm sitting here in my den... pondering everything that's happened over the last few months of my life... and I'm scared. I'm scared in a good way. I never thought I'd get to this point in my life so quickly. I feel like I have an indentity now and I'm not just the "drunkass" who loves to party. I have substance and I have style. It feels great. Sometimes when I start talking I don't recognize myself... but I'm getting better.

So now I ask everyone... where do I go from here? I'm afraid I'll run out of ways to improve myself! What does a 'man' do at this point? I don't want a girlfriend... she would just hold me back. But what do I do?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DJ4Real

Master Don Juan
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Just apply what you've learned and things should be in your favor.
 

wowiehowie

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Any kind of change can be, and is, "Scary". It's new and different. Good luck to you on your new path in life.
 
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