I'm really bad at this...

[bookman]

Extremely long story short, I like this girl, I thought she liked me (or maybe she does no clue still) she'd often send me messages on facebook and whatsapp and ends it with kisses and stuff, I went out with her twice, twice I ask and she immediately agrees(6 month apart... I'm a very busy person ) yet nothing happens... I don't get any good vibes from her when we are face to face, last time we went out, when we first met she didn't lean in to kiss hello it's like I had to do all the effort. The end of the night no kiss goodbye, no kino or anything like that ever happened... And hey I am a complete noob at this, I am very proud to say that for the first time in my life I did not make a complete wuss out of myself, I did not throw myself in to pay or do favors, and I kept my dignity (yay ) I am just frustrated that what seemed to be an easy date simply did not work out...

And yeah many will say "well dude you should have escalated and stuff" yeah easier said than done when you show up all excited and your date is as passive as a plant... And for the numbers game thing... I just can't go out with anyone, I don't go for looks I go for personality types, and not shallow is hard to find

 

[Dali_tx_o]

Look up:

Frame.
Aloofness.
Amused mastery.

Look in the archives of SoSuave forums, ChateauHeartiste and/or rationalmale.

 

[bookman]

Yes I read all that stuff and more... Knowing what to do and training your reflexes to do them are 2 separate things Also I have a problem which is I talk alot, I murder mystery right there

 

[Dali_tx_o]

Then read it all again. Next time you're with a girl and get an urge to talk, to do *something* because your reflex says you should, just take a moment. Slow it down, in your mind, your actions. Your next five dates won't be about getting laid, it will be about you. Stop caring about the outcome with the girl of the moment.

Ask your friend in different town if you can stay at his for a day. Visit him, go out to town alone and practice. You won't have any pressure because hey, nobody knows you there, and even if you screw up - you won't see those girls again. There won't be any pressure.

As for talking too much - I used to get that as well. Before you meet up with a girl, just repeat to yourself in your mind, five, ten, twenty times:

"I'm here to have fun. I don't care what the girl thinks about me. I will see if I like her, if she is GOOD enough for me, if she is interesting herself!".

Simply, prepare for the failure. Go meet a girl not expecting anything, not expecting that this will work out, that you will sleep with her, that you will kiss her. And remember - you do 30% of the talking, while girl does 70%. Instead of thinking what you should say next, just listen to what girl is saying and ask about it.

She says she likes skiing?

Where did she go? Why does she like it? Does she go often? How did she pick it up? What was her first time skiing? Become the great listener. Read http://www.sosuave.com/articles/at/converse.htm over and over.

Resist your urge to talk about yourself. You are not there to impress her. She is here to impress you.

 

[JoeMarron]

Look up:

Frame.
Aloofness.
Amused mastery.

Look in the archives of SoSuave forums, ChateauHeartiste and/or rationalmale.

That stuff is good but it only works if the chick has some attraction towards him which cleary she doesn't. Messages with kisses and stuff at the end don't mean sh!t. OP you went on two dates and still arent getting any good vibes from her. On to the next one.