I'm going to admit this for the sake of learning.

[sosilky]

I have to admit that when I'm dating somebody or have dated somebody or want to date somebody a slight sting hits me. I can't stand the thought of that person being with someone else sexualy, having fun with them whatever. It just seems like something special i only want them to experience with me. I know peopel are gonna say I'm jealous but I can't think of a reeason I would be jealous. people are gonna say its my insecurities but i can't think of anything to be insecure about. I mean we all have things we would like to improve about ourselves. i don't know i won't rule these reasons out if you can explain why.something tells me there might be something else though.

I don't know why I am so possesive. Then again i'm not sure if its being possesive. I'm able to keep this feelings at Bay but I don't even like having to do that. Why am I like this and what is an outlook i can adopt to stop this? by the way i'm busy achieving goals and can pull girls. but i'm open to whatever opinions. bring it on just please provide a solution as wel.

 

[slaog]

I get the same feeling. Don't know why either but it could be slight oneitis.

 

[Nighthawk]

sosilky, it's great you want to learn, but 18 threads in one week?

 

[sosilky]

sosilky, it's great you want to learn, but 18 threads in one week?

is that a problem? is there a limit? anyways back to the OP

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

OP:

don't worry about all the threads.

solution? you got issues bro, deal with them. How? depends on why you feel the way you do. Try EFT.

Also try journaling. complete brain dump of every serious interaction with every woman you have ever had (and I mean EVERY one). That ought to stir the pot up. It should take you minimum 20 minutes a day for a couple weeks depending on how fast you type. don't worry about errors or anything. you want to try to get it straight from your brain into words. go through twice (yea twice). and the first time, write everything that actually happened. second time thorugh, write out all the crap that comes up, how it makes you feel, how THAT makes you feel. (but please please please please don't post any of it!!!)

When you start feeling whatever you mean when you say "Sting", try saying stuff like "this reminds me of when...." and then do some EFT. Then just keep digging and digging. You should do EFT everyday until, um, your dead.

 

[DavenJuan]

well the easy solution to this is NOT thinking about your gf in this type of situation.

easier said then done, but thats part of growing into a true DJ. these thoughts are negative and self deafeting.

if a boxer thought that he COULD lose his next fight, he would probably not have the same success rate of winnning then he would if he were truely confident.

focus on the things that are relative. and especially focus on YOU.

GOOD LUCK BROTHER

 

[Groovy]

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something; in the absence of good grounds for belief, he will be satisfied with bad ones.

-Bertrand Russell

Clear away the negative toughts! They won't do you no good.

You should be happy with the girl, and without the girl.

Besides these obvious observations, I can't tell you more. It just happens. For me, it just clicked one day. Look for positives in every situation.

Just be satisfied with yourself is the key, I think. It call comes from withtin.

Good luck!

 

[sosilky]

OP:

don't worry about all the threads.

solution? you got issues bro, deal with them. How? depends on why you feel the way you do. Try EFT.

Also try journaling. complete brain dump of every serious interaction with every woman you have ever had (and I mean EVERY one). That ought to stir the pot up. It should take you minimum 20 minutes a day for a couple weeks depending on how fast you type. don't worry about errors or anything. you want to try to get it straight from your brain into words. go through twice (yea twice). and the first time, write everything that actually happened. second time thorugh, write out all the crap that comes up, how it makes you feel, how THAT makes you feel. (but please please please please don't post any of it!!!)

When you start feeling whatever you mean when you say "Sting", try saying stuff like "this reminds me of when...." and then do some EFT. Then just keep digging and digging. You should do EFT everyday until, um, your dead.

um....ok that was necesary, glad you could act like you've never felt this way before and then insult me coward

 

[Viking25]

Men are territorial...we don't want our women sleep with other guys. I feel exactly the same way. That's why I would only marry a virgin.

 

[ketostix]

Well look at it this way. So I don't get confused as saying women are property and a possesion, say you are renting an apartment and paying the rent. You don't want squaters in it while you are away dirtying it up without you're permision or knowledge and only to find out they might be trying to change the locks so you will be locked out without an apartment.

 

[Mavrick]

You have been self-hypnotized with the thought of delusional love. You're anxious and have mistaken your neediness to be love. You're selfish. If you really loved someone, you'd be happy for them that they have found their own happiness. No one, absolutely no one, can make you feel a feeling except you. It's in your head, bro.

You've taken a woman and plugged her into your void and started to feel what a self-confident, self-valued man already feels without a woman. Then when she unplugs herself, you become deflated and hurt because you depended on her for your happiness.

 

[reset]

You have been self-hypnotized with the thought of delusional love. You're anxious and have mistaken your neediness to be love. You're selfish. If you really loved someone, you'd be happy for them that they have found their own happiness. No one, absolutely no one, can make you feel a feeling except you. It's in your head, bro.

You've taken a woman and plugged her into your void and started to feel what a self-confident, self-valued man already feels without a woman. Then when she unplugs herself, you become deflated and hurt because you depended on her for your happiness.

yup that's basically it. Neediness becomes "love".

 

[sosilky]

yup that's basically it. Neediness becomes "love".

so basicaly there is no such thing as love? never get married? never have a family?

 

[Mavrick]

so basicaly there is no such thing as love? never get married? never have a family?

Get married and have a family, BUT love yourself. That's the one you love the most. Once you do, everything else falls into place. If you fall in love, fall in love with yourself.

I don't believe in falling in love. Not one bit. I believe in love and there are so many types of love.

 

[reset]

There's a difference between neediness and love. Some people love each other and some are just needy.

 

[sosilky]

There's a difference between neediness and love. Some people love each other and some are just needy.

I think I see what you guys are saying but to expect to be 100% your whole life is ridiculous. Everybidy has ups and downs. Everybosy needs support sometimes. Am I to expect my girlfriend not to support me when things aren't going my way? if there is a crisis in my family or something shes gonna walk away because i'm being needy?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

..act like you've never felt this way before..

how exactly did you get this from my post?

..and then insult me..

where exactly did I insult you?

coward

what was it about my post that made you think I'm a coward?


I apologize for my all my shortcomings.

good luck :cheer:

 

[mintxx]

easy solution: have two girlfriends at all times