I'm done with my friends...I need a new life

[One on One]

That's it....I'm fed up with my life and I'm ready for a new chapter. My "friend" said some **** to me a few days ago and it was over the line...never want to talk to him again. And, it got me thinking that I need new friends. My friends have been holding me back now...I feel like it's time to move on. Here are some of the people I hang with:

1. The guy who was my best "friend," who doesn't know when to shut his mouth and says some stupid **** like he said to me and he's too arrogant to realize it. Enough of this...he's stopped wanting to do anything fun for the last few months anyways.

2. Another friend of mine who is always up to go out and is a cool guy to hang out with, but when you hang out for him for a while, you realize how insecure he is. All we ever do is go out and try to "pick up girls," but we even really try ****, just talk about it. And, he's always pressuring me to approach girls, but makes a ****load of excuses when I tell him he never does. He makes going out stressful at this point.

3. This guy I'm actually going to start hanging out with more even though he acts like he's gay and he's the biggest AFC on the planet. The good thing about him is he's into going out to bars and just hanging out without the "stress" my last friend causes. Plus, he isn't shy about talking to girls and wants to meet them, but he'll be happy just chilling too. He looks better than my other friends too so together we can have some opportunities here. The main thing is he is no stress for me.

4. Another big time AFC. This guy is classic AFC. Afraid to talk to girls, never wants to go anywhere where there's a lot of people. He's really shy. I'll still hang with him on occassion, but **** gets annoying because he'll try to bring me down when I approach girls.

I don't really have anybody else to hang with except a few people who I see occasionally, but as you can see, I don't have much to choose from. I need to move on. I need to move out of this house within a few months. I don't know how to start a new life, though. It's a scary realization that I now have to meet a complete new set of people...plus people are getting married and ****. I'm only 22 and I don't wanna get married, but I need to start dating some girls.

 

[Seeph]

Your putting too much pressure on yourself.. Buck up and realize that if you want to get out of the house means you have to get a job and move out. simple as that. yes it's somewhat scarry but you can and will deal with it.

If your tired of hanging out with your friends then yall must not be great friends any more.. people change and some people grow apart. Get new friends.. it will happen. It sounds like the first "new friend" would make a decent wingman.. It's a hard place to be I've been there.. You just have to relax and let go and decide which path to take in your life. It's all up to how you take on this new challenge.

Good Luck.

 

[comic_relief]

Yo man,
I hear ya loud and clear. I was friends with these skaters/punks, who I was friends with since first and second grade. I was always chilling with them and stuff. A new kid came in and started harassing me and my "friends" joined in on it too.I even asked my "friends" to get rid of him or stop him from harassing me. I was so afraid of confrontation that I let it go. It got so bad that I ended up punching the kid in the face(Me... I was one of the kids who would never harm a fly). Which in turn got me a one day suspension but from that point on I stopped talking with them on a daily basis. I lost alot of respect for them after that. I then went to my baseball friends, which I was friends with since about third. I became friends with them but then I didn't really connect with them that well. So I moved on to another collection of friends, who were in 9th grade, and met a bunch of hotties with them. Now I have the insecure AFC, the cool popular kids, and the guys with girlfriends which is actually really cool. (I get to watch the AFC make some of the worst textbook mistakes like become friends with the girl before asking her out.) But now I am going off track. I now still hang out with my old friends but I don't feel that friendship that I used to feel with them. I am just thinking about not really talking to them anymore because no one wants to do anything that I care to do(video games).
But I do believe that if you hang out with new people that you will make new friends that you will enjoy more then the old. I have found my hapiness which was missing and it was not a chick like I thought

 

[Soma]

I feel ya man. I ended ties with one great friend about a year ago. Really sucked. Now I'm ending ties with best friend. Been best friends for like 10 years but we've grown apart. It's obvious that he has some sort of resentment towards me. He's cool when he's sober but once he gets a few drinks in him, which is often, he starts saying all kinds of crazy shiet and acts like a damn fool. This has happened, literally, every time we've been around other people for the last 6 months or so. He's got something up his @ss but won't come out and say it. I've had enough of his bvllshiet and am making new friends.

Been chillin with an old acquaintance lately, whom I never really hung out with before, and wow, he and I have a great fvcking time together. Through him I've met some hotties. Also been chillin with some friends I met through my current friends. Good times. Been making friends with people from my martial arts classes and at work. I recently met up with some guys who are into the game, to wing together, and they were all cool as hell. Plan on chilling with them once I'm free, to hang out and do stuff outside of PU.


Really, i've practically dropped everyone in my main circle of friends. It's strange, a bit scary, and it's tough at times especially at first. But I've kept on keeping on with being social and slowly but surely I'm meeting new people and making new friends. In the beginning, other than girls I was dating, I was basically staying home cause I wasn't hanging with my main circle of friends anymore. Kinda lonely at times. But now, every weekend is packed with things to do, people callin me up to go out. I often have to plan at least 1-3 weeks in advance and now my friends complain that I'm always busy! hahah It's a positive problem to have.

Strange how you think you'll never find new friends who are as cool or who understand you as well as your current friends. How you'll never experience the same amount of fun and camraderie with new people. But that's not true. You just need to give your new friends a chance, and they you.

Fvck dude, I feel like I know exactly where you're coming from and it's cool to know that I'm not alone in going through this either.

Peace.


-Soma

 

[chicksrock]

Seems like a lot of us DJ's get frustrated with our friends...

I wish DJ's like yourselves lived in my city..

it is very rough to find cool/fun/interesting/easy-going friends...

don't know why everynoe has somethin up their @ss these days...

Finding the right friends is as hard as finding that one right HB...

 

[squirrels]

If you're really confident in yourself, your friends can't "bring you down" or "hold you back." How many times when you were the chump was there one or two people in your group of friends who was the "alpha male" character and no matter what you or your goofy AFC friends did when you hung out, that one guy was always cool and could laugh at your ridiculousness without feeling bad for being your friend? Without feeling like you were "dragging him down" by hanging out with him?

As far as the one guy who said or did something "over the line," that I can see as a legitimate reason to de-friend someone. But you shouldn't just dump all your friends because YOU feel anxious in social situations, wondering what people think of the crowd you run with.

A real "DJ"'s presence defines the crowd...it isn't defined by it. One of the things people always said about Michael Jordan was that he played so well he made the people around him better. They shouldn't be looking at you thinking, "Eww, he runs with those losers, he must be a loser too." They should be looking at your friends and saying, "Wow, they run with HIM, they must be cool in SOME way."

Am I saying that you're responsible for your friends? HELL NO. You ARE responsible for yourself, though. Unless your friends are doing something to UTTERLY embarass you (and I'm talking about being obnoxious drunks, harassing girls, starting fights, that kind of embarassment), I suspect a lot of the problem is with you and your own self-confidence.

 

[One on One]

How does one go about making new friends now? I feel I am ready to move on to a new stage in my life. I only have two friends who I wish to keep and I don't feel like hanging out with them all the time. It's difficult...I only hung out with dorks in HS so I don't know many cool guys around here. I'm changed so much I can't relate to most of the people I knew.

Thank you for the support, everyone.

 

[Ebach]

Seems like a lot of us DJ's get frustrated with our friends...

I wish DJ's like yourselves lived in my city..

Even us DJs are not a pretty flower. Cool people are everywhere, it just takes time to get to know people better. You shouldn't judge on first impressions because people change their mood every few seconds throughout the day. Everyone has good as well as bad days. I'm tired of inexperienced people talking how people got **** up their ass. The world is not problem free. People gotta work, people gotta pay the bills, and chilling becomes a privilidge.

it is very rough to find cool/fun/interesting/easy-going friends...

If we didn't have to work for a living, all of us would be cool, fun and easy going. But we have to make a living and the economy isn't in its best these days.

don't know why everynoe has somethin up their @ss these days...

Because mommy and daddy are not there anymore. "coolness" is overrated. Be a ****ing man. Men are not always cool.

Finding the right friends is as hard as finding that one right HB...

Right friends? Who are they? Are they something similar to the perfect girlfriend? That oneitis of yours? People are different. Come from different backgrounds. I bet there's always stuff to talk about and chill with all kinds of people.

Too much whining. Everyone wants to be with COOL peeps. I'm cool when I don't have anything hot going on. I'm cool when I'm not ****ing my girl. I'm cool when I don't have to deal with the bills on my porch. I'm cool when I don't have a headache. You dig? Life is not so perfect. Get over it and just live life as best as you can.

**** this ****. I'm out.

 

[chicksrock]

FVCK ME Ebach..
i didn't not mean it as some sort of personal attack..
fvck.. i think you need to chill out...

I understand people have stresses in their jobs and stuff..
that's totally understandable..
its upto each individual person to make the most of their lives...

You can be cool at work..and outside of work...

if you don't like your job.. i don't necessarily think you need to change your job...
its all about your attitude and frame of mind... see positive things in your work.. be nice to your work mates, etc etc...

but maybe you are way too advanced for my obviously inferior advice because you know life and the world so much better than me. . .
just because you make a living for yourself OBVIOUSLY makes you more supperior and wiser doesn't it.....

**** this ****. I'm out.