I'm being Friendzonised

[Balcher]

First of all I want to state that I'm really impressed with this forum. When I started reading it I realized the noob I am in dating.

Now I will tell my case. We are both 25. It all started around 10 months ago. She's a girl i know because we have lots of friends in common. But untill january I noticed her existence. I mean, I said "hello" and "good-bye" to her. But that was pretty much all of it. During that time I was getting out of a 6 year relationship and she had broken up with her boyfriend a couple of months before. All of a sudden she started giving me more attention than ussual. But I was still with my ex, so I didin't payed attention to her.

Two months latter I ended my relationship and thought "Well.. lets give it a try." And so, after a couple of weeks we ended having sex. But another ex appeared in the scene and well... all was %/#$#. From that point on we were just friends. But from time to time we ended up in some awkward point in which some sort of sexual tension arised. One time we ended up kissing, but because I knew the thing with his guy was serious I dated other women. Nonetheless we developed kind of a close friendship. Fortunately i'm not her best friend but we are just "good friends".

A couple of weeks ago went to party with our friends and she started flirting to me, but it didin't escalated. Yeah... I know, but that's the way it happened. The next week her boyfriend went to live to Brazil. But from that point on she started to call me "friend" and telling me how much she is happy of me being around her. When that happened I started being more touchy with her. She has accepted it, also she hasn't called me "friend" again.

A couple of days ago we went camping with our friends and ended up with her best friend on the same camping house. The cold was terrible, so I hugged her . We ended up like spoons. Today I invited her and some friends to see a DVD but she had something really important to do. So I ended up seeing it with my friends.

I'm pretty creeped. Please give me your thoughts.

 

[Tiguere]

If it were me, the second she called me "friend," I would have replied, "Is that how you see me? As a friend?"

Remember that it takes at least 2 people to form a friendship. You don't have to be her friend, even if she wants to be yours.

easy tiger. dont pay too much attention to her words. follow her actions instead. the chick im banging right now calls me friend every single time. what do i care what she calls me. could careless. we as men shouldnt pay too much attention to labels. leave that to girls

 

[Balcher]

Oh thanks to both of you. Also I forgot something else to say. That same night when we were camping, she found me flirting with another girl. Latter that night she asked me why I'm always over that other chic, for some times before we had ended up having sex or something. I think it was some sort of jealous reaction.

If I'm not mistaken, the clues for getting out of the dreaded just friends zone are basically being sexual around her and stop being available. Being that the case, I believe I can escalate sexually with her without being intimidating. Also I was thinking of going into a date with another girl this week.

Maybe I'm not in the friend zone, I don't know. But the idea actually gives me the creeps.

Balcher

 

[Balcher]

A lot has happened in all this time. I will briefly say that I have played my cards in a way more like the principles defended here in sosuave.net. I made a lot of kino, dated other women, not being readily available and a person one will be glad to be with. That made her make a lot of advances on me, started to talk about loving me, begged me to cuddle with her, being in the parties talking for hours with no one but me, etc.

Last Sunday I kinoed her like there was no tomorrow and finally kissed her. Actually all felt and looked as natural as if we were a couple. But another problem began, it is that during this week I have been texting and talking with her through chat almost everyday and even though she has responded to everything in an interested fashion (she asked questions, recommended me music and answered in a reasonable amount of time), she is read notoriously less excited than the last week. On Wednesday I saw her with some other friends to watch a movie in her house. At first she was kind of distant, but when all of our friends except her roomie were gone, I started to touch her not so heavily. Even though she allowed me to put my arm around her, touch her hand and arms for a bit, etc. she seemed nervous. Nothing happened that night.

When I arrived to my home, she texted me thanking me for staying with her after everybody else was gone, telling that she wished I stayed longer with her to see another movie (meaning that to stay in her place, for I left at 1pm). Also she invited me to see a movie with her when I wanted to. But again on Friday I texted her and occurred the same story. She answered, but not that excited.

The reasons for all could be many: 1) she feels awkward (she has some issues with relationships), 2) her ex bf in Brazil, 3) me talking to her too much. I have to tell that all these conversations were started by me, excepting that one text she send me after being at her place.

I'm losing my coll with this one. Any advice will be great.