Im back: Very messed up, need advice

[slickaz]

Ok so its been ALONG LONG while since i posted here last.

Since then ive moved up, gotten a much better job, penthouse apartment overlooking the city on the north shore and lost an extra 5 pounds of body fat.

I was dating a gorgeous italian girl, decided to take time off the game and settle with one.
Prior to this girl and while i dated her, i was super confident, excited and was happy with my self.
One day, im heading to the airport, 4 months through dating, im about to fly overseas for a week on business and she tells me she has a fiance. Always had him, hes overseas with his family and waiting for her to fly over to get married.

Im not sure why but i lost my cool then, i broke it off clean, BUT since then ive had self confidence problems, i feel like every chic on the street is potential but i cant seem to get myself to approach. I feel like im not attractive anymore to women. I dont even know why! Im healthy, make good money and drive a mice car.

The problem stems from :
1. All my friends are married/fathers:its adding pressure on me to find one and get married
2. That break up made me lose all faith in women so every girl i see i can feel the drama.

I know my friends hate being married but something inside me wants me to get married.

Am I being too picky with who i date now? Coz i feel like the next one should be wifey so i want one thats hot and decent. So ive totally lost focus by adding pressure on myself to find a hot chic

I know, i know, i can see it!! But i cant believe it. Is this normal?

How to fix?!!

 

[SgtSplacker]

Stop stressing on meeting women, most women are total wackjobs anyways. Why are you worried about looking good to some psycho loser fr33k you don't even know? First meet a decent woman then after you know her and she has earned your respect should you begin to consider her for something more than just sex and stressing over her opinion of you.

Why would you consider wifeing some chick you have only been dating 4 months? You don't know a person after 4 months, heck even after a year! I'd have to be dating a girl at least 2 years before I even begin to consider them worthy of being a life long partner... LIFE LONG PARTNER... ok? Not a decision to be considered for only 4 months.

You have an issue with esteem for sure but more importantly it looks like you really think that just any girl is an upgrade for you. Relax dude, get to know these girls before you start putting them on a pedestal. You don't want a museum full of pedestal displaying common street trash do you? Sounds like you have some things to show for your success, you are a catch don't forget that. Just because your stables are empty don't rush to fill them with mules, wait for the good horses... it's a bit of a commitment.

Want to know where you went wrong with your girl? It was this decision you made after only 4 months that changed your attitude and she picked up on it:
"I was dating a gorgeous italian girl, decided to take time off the game and settle with one."
You never want a girl to think she has you, she always must think you are ready to walk if she stops pleasing you. She must always think she has to do something to keep you happy. It is a womans role to please, it has to be this way for her to be truly happy. Try to keep her happy like this and she will never leave. Women are not like men, a man can easily be satisfied receiving what he wants. For a woman it's a game of getting what she wants if she wins the game is over, but if she loses she must keep playing. It is a game that is never meant to be won by her. Think of it like peace in chaos...

 

[Brosy]

Well first of all, respect for cutting off clean, that is brutal, takes some will-power and shows massive self-respect.

Unsurprisingly you've just lost your mojo. In my experience this comes from within, there's no quick fix, it'll be back when it's back... but rest assured it will be back.

Until then, take a step back to brush yourself off or you could easily end up "settling" for anything while your self-esteem is shot.

...also, forget what anyone else has got, concentrate on remembering who you are as a single entity for now. Of your friends who is married/parent, are they the same guy you used to know? personally I can list 3 out of 9 from my (old) inner circle who are exactly the same person (thus found the right woman), the other 6 are unrecognizable and in so deep they will be f!*king destroyed when/if it goes south. Currently (UK) 50% of marriages are failing... enough said.

 

[slickaz]

Damn!....thanks guys, that was the best advice i could ask for.
Well written and to the point.

I really need to read that daily till i get over this crap low in on.

Like Brosy said, It Will be back!...

 

[Sandow]

I took some time off of game, and while you may feel ok, you are subconsciously getting worse. Finally, you wither down until she breaks it off with you. It really sneaks up on you. All it takes is some new hot shot who's on top of his game...and you're done.