I'm 31 shes 22..7 month relationship

[Crissco]

Hi everyone, been a long time since ive been on these forums. Glad to see some familiar faces. So heres the deal. Ive been dating a women for the past 7 months, she cooks for me, cleans for me, does food delivery with me (Door dash), pretty much does everything for me and with me which is an issue of course in its own sense. Recently she went back to her home country for the summer and we've been facetiming everyday, twice a day. - Shes starting to get on my nerves a bit, shes a bit immature in a lot of ways when you get to know the real her, she seeks validation alot, wants me to agree with her in a lot of ways, puts up "cute fits where she pouts"(doesn't yell or get angry). You know typical young women stuff, and since in 31 it starting to get on my nerves but im going along with it since we have a weird make fun of each other make weird noises together relationship. - Im actually at the point of ending it in the fear of being cheated on while shes away. Everyone I talked to said get busy, get a better job, and make yourself better which is true since i check my phone 24/7 to see if she texted me(she doesnt know this) or if shes online, im getting obssesive and its bad and im fully aware. Im still not sure if i should break up with her or not. Shes caring in a lot of ways, great girl, great head on her shoulders its just the immaturity thing bothers me at times and i feel like im playing one big game all the time and im past that. What would you do in my situation?

Thanks

 

[MadMan]

Why do you think she will cheat on you? Has she cheated on you before? You can't control what other people will or will not do. Only what you yourself will do.

If she's getting on your nerves have you spoken to her about things instead of asking these forums? You might want to start with speaking to her about things first and see if actions match words.That's what I would do.

 

[Kotaix]

I've been there, and done all that.

The problem is that you're fully in her frame, you'd forgotten the rest of the world exists. It sounds she has you trained like a lapdog, and you know it subconsciously; and I suspect you're starting to hate yourself for it now that she's out of the picture and you're having what alcoholics like to call a moment of clarity.

You're going to lose her if you keep validating her and jumping thru her hoops the way you are now. Don't respond to her when she insists on asking where you are. Learn to tell her no and get out there and make male friends to hang out with doing an activity you enjoy (without her). You should also ask yourself if you even like her, you're not even close to your prime yet, and you should be when that time comes.

Go to the gym and start developing physical power if you aren't already. Hit on random women on the street until they smile when you look them in the eyes. You have carte blanche to improve yourself while she's gone, I suggest you make full use of it.

 

[kbbroiler1971]

My question is when is she coming back? Could it extend past the summer? If not, you have an imaginary relationship. Also what Kotaix said is right you are in her frame by responding to her by giving validation. If it was me, I'd cut her loose. See one thing that happens with LTRs is the break up a lot in summer because usually the girl wants to have fun. You could be broken up already. Meaning this she has the benefit of being in another country and doing what she wants with who knows who. This is why you are in her frame because she has you plus other possiblities as well. So she might be using you as a ploy to hang on to while doing what Coach Greg Adams says on his YouTube channel. Doing monkey back flips with Chad and Tyrone while you are being a simpanzee on the side. Don't be a simp. I'd start spinning plates if I were you.

 

[Spaz]

My question is when is she coming back? Could it extend past the summer? If not, you have an imaginary relationship. Also what Kotaix said is right you are in her frame by responding to her by giving validation. If it was me, I'd cut her loose. See one thing that happens with LTRs is the break up a lot in summer because usually the girl wants to have fun. You could be broken up already. Meaning this she has the benefit of being in another country and doing what she wants with who knows who. This is why you are in her frame because she has you plus other possiblities as well. So she might be using you as a ploy to hang on to while doing what Coach Greg Adams says on his YouTube channel. Doing monkey back flips with Chad and Tyrone while you are being a simpanzee on the side. Don't be a simp. I'd start spinning plates if I were you.

Spinning plates is useless for a man with a weak frame. He'd end up the same and more likely worse off.

He's been here a long time, he should know by now what he needs to do.

 

[Focal core]

You seems insecured for a 31yo, worried about your gf cheating wanted to break it off? Is this are the whole point of this thread? If yes then here's your answer:

1. Take a look if shes still admire you, her action showed.
2. Trust. Did you trust her? If you don't (maybe from her darker side/aspect/ issues) its already over.
3.respect. Still in respectful relationship? it's then its okay.
4. Intimacy. Look at this side very closely.. feelings toward each other, sex appeal, CLOSENESS is the most important part of a whole healthy relationship.

Analyze this and made your call.

 

[lamath]

I think you are lacking perspective.

Why are you such a wreck? Why are you afraid she will cheat? Why are you checking your phone all the time?

I think you already know the anwser and deeply know what you need to do.

Be a man an analyse the data you have in a objective way, then act on it.