Ignoring her/Acting Aloof....gone wrong?

[Rebound Material]

So, ive been trying to stay off my target for quite some time now. I havent initiated any calls/text or talk to her at work(maybe a simple "hi"). Im trying to act aloof and not care but I feel like im not doing it right...Today at work she tried talking to me when I went up to get a notepad at the hostess station but I left quickly before we were in a conversation(I did that twice). I can tell she was trying to be playful/flirty but I felt that my parting words made me seem either angry at her or just annoyed by her. While I was in the back of the store just chillin listening to the music on my phone, she went up to me and just kinda snapped her finger in my face as if trying to get me out of a trance while making some deep eye contact and I just looked at her expressionless(I hope) and looked away ignoring what she did. I personally think that my reactions towards her come off as mean and may not exactly getting the "I don't care about you" thing. Its hard to act like you don't care about someone that youre targeting/have interest in when they're the ones trying get your attention...SO guys, id like your input on this. Did I do this right? Any suggestions on how to NOT acknowledge someone intentionally without coming off as if you were angry at them or the sort?

 

[ready123]

the point is to avoid acting needy. that's where the turnoff is

for some reason a lot of guys think this is equivalent to being aloof and coming across like you're not interested

it's not the same thing

 

[Rebound Material]

the point is to avoid acting needy. that's where the turnoff is

for some reason a lot of guys think this is equivalent to being aloof and coming across like you're not interested

it's not the same thing

Thanks dood...So should I have just gone with what she was doing and just flirted back?

 

[MushroomGod]

Thanks dood...So should I have just gone with what she was doing and just flirted back?

yea you should of

 

[Sandow]

I focus more on attraction first, rather than play games. I would build rapport, reveal some disclosures, kino, teasing, etc.

when trying to act aloof, it's important that you have built attraction first, and that you know she likes you. then you can kind of play with her head. It just wont work if you havent built that foundation yet.


If we can get girls by just simply acting aloof, sh!t, everyone would be getting more a$$ than a toilet seat!

We are making a very simple thing WAY more complicated that it needs to be.

 

[Rebound Material]

I focus more on attraction first, rather than play games. I would build rapport, reveal some disclosures, kino, teasing, etc.

when trying to act aloof, it's important that you have built attraction first, and that you know she likes you. then you can kind of play with her head. It just wont work if you havent built that foundation yet.


If we can get girls by just simply acting aloof, sh!t, everyone would be getting more a$$ than a toilet seat!

We are making a very simple thing WAY more complicated that it needs to be.

thanks for the reply, but I believe I did gain her interest not too long ago. I posted 2 threads about it. One about having set a date with her that was canceled(by me), and the other about me trying to reschedule but she wasnt available. Look it up.

 

[Sandow]

It sounds like you may be coming off a little mean. I probably wouldn't ignore her as much. I would try to add some mixed signals in there. Talk/Flirt with her at times, other times you can ignore her. That should get her panties in a bunch.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

What you are doing is completely blowing her off. Which, will make her loose interest. What you should be doing is giving her some of the attention she wants. Then, you can go about your business.

 

[iqqi]

What you are doing is completely blowing her off. Which, will make her loose interest. What you should be doing is giving her some of the attention she wants. Then, you can go about your business.

Agreed, and you ARE seeming mad.

This is what you DON'T want. It makes you look like a dweeb.

 

[DonGorgon]

Mean is good. If she likes you. be mean then laugh it off. She will be happily confused and intreeged

 

[DonGorgon]

^^^its a balancing act yes. but is works

 

[mrRuckus]

Wait, why are you trying to ignore her?

 

[DonGorgon]

^Very true but because women are constantly being offered "interest" they dont respond to it the way we think they should. They prefer to be interested in you than you interested in them cause most men are already "interested" in them. i.e. they must chose you. Always let them be one step ahead as far as attraction goes.

 

[JLR]

^Very true but because women are constantly being offered "interest" they dont respond to it the way we think they should. They prefer to be interested in you than you interested in them cause most men are already "interested" in them. i.e. they must chose you. Always let them be one step ahead as far as attraction goes.

Not trying to put words in your mouth, but are you seriously advocating letting the woman determine the rules of engagement? If so, might want to take another look at a man's role as the leader...

 

[Rebound Material]

Wait, why are you trying to ignore her?

This was just in case ppl had questions about my situation.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=136360
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=137346

She texted me today after I stopped by work. She said "U seem sad lately are you ok buddy?" well, along those lines. So I guess I was wrong? I seemed sad instead of pissed/mean i guess. I told her that I was just a little stressed with school was all and I initiated the flirting by accussing her of being worried about me and that I found it "sweet". She would try to deny it with our usual teasing dialouge. It went on back and fort for a bit and I believe Im showing her that Im not pissed at her or anything and that Im still in the game.

 

[iqqi]

^^^ Good job.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Being mean to your girl and ignoring her can work good and bad. You just need to find the balance so you don't go over board.

 

[iqqi]

Clear your PM box.

Til then:
(My response)-Well, I do think she is reaching out to YOU, which is good. I say, keep giving her space, because it seems like you keep throwing things out there, but she doesn't jump on any of them. This could be for a number of reasons, some bad. I doubt it is any of the bad reasons (like she isn't interested at all), cuz she keeps reaching out.

I say actively pursue another plate to keep from plunging into one-itis.

After you consider THAT, I have another suggestion...