"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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If you like a girl who works at a coffee shop,

I_Only_Live_Once

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what would be your strategy to ask her out? would you just talk to her about stuff and hope she likes you over time?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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reyalp

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Originally posted by ethnomethodologist
*BUMP*
what a shameless way to increase your postcount.
 

Cheat_LBJ

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How the hell does anyone who registered in JANUARY of '06 have over 500 posts?

Seriously, if you're spending that much time on this site...
 

ethnomethodologist

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Really?!?!

You guys have no clue do you? You also bring up something you could have PMed me about in another guys thread.

Mod's could you delete the posts that are useless here? I want a few people to respond to this thread. I don't want it to be bombarded with rule breaking thumpers.

PS reset my post count as well, as well delete my title, it is useless.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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CGE333

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I have had success with a coffee shop girl in the past. First off you have to realize many of the guys and perhaps some of the women that are customers there are in to this chick. But that is okay because most of them are wimps and too afraid to ask her out, while you are a DJ.

My suggestion is if possible try and go in there when the store is note quite as busy. From there it is just the basics: smile, eye contact, throw in some kino, and tease her. I have had success in the past with the become a regular and after a few months you end up dating her approach, but I actually oppose that way now. It is a waste of time, $$$, and effort. I would say within the first couple of times you go in there you need to ask. While you are doing the above and having a great conversation act like you are in a hurry to get somewhere (besides just in her panties) and tell her you should continue the conversation later, # close her, get the # and split.

Then on your way home go into the other 5 coffee shops you pass and repeat the process. By the end of the day you will have a fresh stack of phone #'s and will have so much caffeine in you that you'll stay awake for a week.
 

Unregistered

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Invite her out for coffee. She must like coffee if she works in a shop.

Then **** her.
 

Machina

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I work at a coffee shop with a lot of girls, and trust me, the last thing you want to do is ask a girl who works in a coffee shop out for coffee. The girls I work with are pretty hot, and have had guys ask them on coffee dates while they are working, and pretty much all of them said it was too cheesy.
 

biker_gixxer

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I would go in and have some fun with her. Don't worry about the out come, that is added pressure you don't need.

Tease her (as CGE333 said), make her laugh, give her a thrill, get her blood flowing, make her feel happy she decided to come into work that day. Once you start doing all these things, she will start to assoicate these good feelings with 'you' (this is very powerful).

Once you see her feeling comfortable with you (she'll drop hints, look for them), then get her email or number on your way out the door.

Note: A girl doesn't like you over time, it doesn't work that way. If she decides to F your brains out, it happens very, very quickly, so be ready.
 
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reyalp

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Pre-planning the conversation isn't going to fly. You just have to be spontaneous. Although you might throw in the "See, she's happy because she's working at xxxx" bit, that usually gets a laugh out of girls at work.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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