"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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If It's Been Awhile

Powerlifter

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I was wondering when getting back in the game or dating arena and it's been awhile since you've had sex with a woman can a woman detect this or is the only way is you tell them?

I am trying to calm my nerves since it's been close to 2 years from just being to busy to other things going on in my life.

Will a woman be turned off if it's been awhile for a man who hasn't had sex or is it a non issue and I should just go with the flow?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Sinistar

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Since you've already been with women and it's only been a couple of years I don't think she'll have any way of detecting it. Now, if you were a 40yo virgin she's probably gonna pick up on the vibe of inexperience and desperation.

I do think it would be a complete waste of time to tell her; she'll start wondering why not, she'll starting wondering why you told her - just opens the door for more totally unnecessary questions.

I think the bigger question should be, what made you even consider telling her? Did you think it would help you as a couple to "be more honest" (or some variant thereof)? Did you think it would get her to tell you how it's been for her?
 

Powerlifter

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Sinistar, at this point I haven't told anyone it was just a general question in what a man to do in such a situation to calm the nerves but maybe a little red wine or a beer might help too.

Actually I wouldn't feel comfortable telling a woman and just let it comes naturally.

Everything is coming together good right now with the lady folk.

I am to meet another a lady next week who wants to meet me who is 36 so eventually sex is going to come into play as I won't have it any other way so the reason for my question and don't want to mess it up when the time comes.

I am sure once I get my groove back I will be find.

Anyway, thanks for the reply.
 

squirrels

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Powerlifter said:
I was wondering when getting back in the game or dating arena and it's been awhile since you've had sex with a woman can a woman detect this or is the only way is you tell them?

I am trying to calm my nerves since it's been close to 2 years from just being to busy to other things going on in my life.

Will a woman be turned off if it's been awhile for a man who hasn't had sex or is it a non issue and I should just go with the flow?
Some can tell, most can't.

If you haven't, big deal. When you have sex is your OWN business.

If she wants to bang you, it won't matter when your last was. If I haven't been laid in a while, I typically TELL the girl when the physical element heats up, just so she'll be expected the sub-par stay-power for the first round. :whistle: It's never been a deal-breaker so far.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Powerlifter,
Just remember there are two people involved here,if anything goes wrong she might well think it's her...Sex is a bit like riding a bicycle,you never forget how to do it....Make sure you take half a Viagra so you don't let the side down,and be gentle.
 

Diamondhead

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OP, if it helps, with one of my ex's, it had been 4.5 years prior to her that I had sex (bad, I know)

and she was known for having alot of experience.

and probably the first 3 or 4 times I assumed the jig was up and she was going to quit calling me. She didn't, and actually assumed I'd been with alot of girls (not true)

So moral is.... you'd be surprised what you can hide as long as you play it cool.
 
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