If I just started talking to people, would it come off as wierd

[slitherjef]

There are a couple girls at work (here it comes... ) that I would not mind getting with. The problem (besides its company ink) is, I don't say a friggin thing to any of them! Well they don't say anything to me either, people just seem to walk around like I barely exist. But anyway, one chick, who knows my friend (not sure how well... or if they still talk or what) I am really interested in.

Anyway, as I said, I don't say much to anyone. I have crossed one of these girls paths every so often, did not say anything. not even how's it going. I blew a couple chances thinking it may be wierd if I just started to talk to these girls just "out of the blue"

My question is, would it be wierd if I just started talking to people that I have worked around for a couple months with out saying much to anyone?

 

[Effington]

I think it would be weirder to stay the weird quiet guy who doesn't talk to anyone.

It's never too late to be social and make friends, and I'd say it's actually very important to have friends at work, or you'll go crazy. Liking the people you work with is a huge factor in job happiness.

 

[Maxtro]

It's never too late to start talking to anybody. Next time you see one of them just say "Hi" or "How it's going?" Your goal isn't to have a conversation, it is only to get on speaking term with them. Once you've actually said something to them you've done the hardest part.

One thing that I've realized is that once you have broken the contact barrier it's much easier to get them to open up. After you've said hi for a couple of days then you can ask them how there weekend was. You don't have to wait a few days just when when ever you feel comfortable. Asking how somebody's weekend was male or female, gets the to open up. All you have to do is ask the right questions.

I'm not good with girls or anything but by simply asking the girl who sits next to me in a class, how her weekend was I learned that; she cleans houses, she's from Sacramento, she has met Arnold Schwarzenegger, she has a boyfriend, her boyfriend goes to a different school and that he is on a wrestling scholarship. Of course she didn't tell me all those things at once, I was just letting her lead the conversation and then asking questions about what she said. I could have gone further by asking her what she does when she is not cleaning houses but I lost my motivation once I learned that she has a BF.

Doing that stuff is only light rapport. It's possible to go much farther, but getting deeper is my sticking point.

 

[Tyron]

I always start conversations out of the blue. And in your work it's probably much easier then with total strangers. What's the problem? Just start topic related to something you're doing, seeing etc. "Have you gained few pounds?" ^^

And Maxtro, you didnt lose intrest when you heard she has a boyfriend. You lost it when you heard he's on a wrestling scholarship!

 

[Playboy]

Hey

Rule # 1

YOU DO NOT GIVE A **** WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK.

Rule # 2

The only time something will come off as truely weird is if you think that it might come off weird. If you are not 100 percent committed to something then the girl will pick up on it and depending how unsure you are will either test you to affirm her feelings or think your creepy.

Rule # 3

ALWAYS look people in the eye and say hows it going or hi or whats up. I want you to do this for the next 7 days. If you find yourself NOT doing this for more than a period of 10 minutes you start over until you get the 7 days.

Rule # 4

I want you to take the positivity challenge and if any period of time elapses where you are focused on anything negative, or worrying for a period of time that elapses 5 minutes you have to start over. Do this for 7 days.

Rule # 5

I want you to smile whenever you FIRST talk to someone, shoot them a smile. Smile a lot but only really HAVE to smile when you are first looking at or talking to someone.

Do these things and you wont ever ask a question like that again. Unless you stop doing them, and then I'll have to just conclude that your weird.

 

[PrinceBeavis]

Yeah, it's harder to start being a conversationalist with people, once they have been led to believe that you're some kind of introvert. But don't worry about it.
Just start talking, and let it pick up naturally.

 

[reset]

Rule # 3

ALWAYS look people in the eye and say hows it going or hi or whats up.

I agree with this. Make eye contact. Smile "hey, howz it goin". But you have to MEAN IT. You don't have to have a conversation. It's one human being acknowledging another in a friendly, confident way. I didn't used to do this. I'd see people and look at the ground. Takes practice but it's worth it. In the last year or so, the amount of people that I pass by and don't make eye contact and say "hey" or at least smile, is in the minority. I used to be very shy. Still am KIND of. But one thing that has changed for me is I've learned to enjoy making eye contact and saying hi with all people I can. Especially chicks. Strange isn't it. Don't pass up these little opportunities to build up your self confidence. Old people count. Little kids count. Person behind the cash register. Everyone counts.

Do these things and you wont ever ask a question like that again.

Yup, just sort of takes care of itself after awhile.

 

[reset]

Rule # 4

...if any period of time elapses where you are focused on anything negative, or worrying for a period of time that elapses 5 minutes you have to start over.

Wow, I want to try this. :woo:

 

[slitherjef]

I usualy have no problem talking to people, they just have to engage me first

 

[Moon Ram]

Let me ask you a simple question," Are you better of in being shy or in talking to those girls? If you think that you are better of in talking to those girls, then why don't you do it. If it comes of as weird, so what. I think you are letting other people shape your world.
Whenever I hesitate in doing something, I ask myself, what is the cause of my hesitation, most of the time the answer is something like, people will laugh at me or they will think I am weird. At that time I ask myself, WHO SAID SO? If it is someone other then me then I say, **** it and then do it.Everybody is trying to define your life. If you listen to them, then you will stay the same. Try to define your own life, then you will grow and improve.:flowers:

 

[cyp6]

it might be kind of cool.. you will shock ppl. talk to guys too though.. not just the girls