Walking Anomaly
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2003
- Messages
- 276
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Hey everybody, thought id give some advice for once, just some things ive learned that can help if youve been in the situation where you thought you were slayin' the ladies with ease and things suddenly went south with a girl youve taken a liking to lol, which im sure has happened to us all...
Here goes...
Cut off communication - This is probably the toughest step as you'll be waiting and wanting to get a reaction out of her, but really it's tougher on her. She's starting to realize how much she liked you and how good she felt around you, and how much she misses you. Dont go overboard with this - dont avoid her, turn the other way when you see her coming down the hall lol, just live your life as if nothing has happened. Cutting off communication is the biggest step.
Start talking to other girls - Honestly this helps for so many reasons. It will get your mind off of the trivial things and keep you from overanalyzing things that all of the other chicks you are spitting game at will do to test you. ALso the girl who went cold on you will probably start to notice and see youre gettin on and having fun living. She will find out that you're talking to this girl, and it will get her back to you. **Use this idea with caution as it may give the wrong signals, such as a sign that she should see move on because you have.**
Recover Emotionally - Particularly if this is a chick youve known for a while and were tryin to have something more with, you don't have a chance of getting her interested again if you're not emotionally calm and controlled. Women dislike needy, clingy, desperate men - so you need to pull your own life together and continue to go out and LIVE before attempting to attract her again.
Act like nothing is wrong - Because nothing should be wrong, shes just one girl who you could easily find a replacement for but may decide you dont want to. The lady will not be interested in you again if you're acting depressed. It will turn her away. Think about it like this ..... if you are a DJ you will have previously shown her that she is there as a bonus in your life to add fun. Acting depressed will lead her to think that you are clingy and consider her a defining characteristic in your life, which honestly she shouldnt be.
Look your best - Make sure your acne is gone, get yourself shaped up, and looking good. She won't be able to resist
The girl will likely contact you. Even if it takes a week or more, she is going to text you or call you. When she does this, you know your mission is accomplished. Now that youve got her interested again, bring back your charm that won her in the first place.
The best way to reconnect with her is to invite her for something fun and non threatening. You dont want to get her alone yet. This assures her that you won't overstay your welcome - maybe lunch or something since both of you have to go back to work afterwards. Plus, if the meeting goes well, it provides a great opportunity to leave her begging for more!
Once you're back into each other and have some more "dates" under your belt, sit down and discuss the issues that led to the coldness or even the break-up if this was a girl you were going out with, and how you're going to avoid them this time. There's no point going back into a relationship only to see it fall apart over the same problems a month down the line.
words for the wise....
When the girl or in some cases if the girl is your ex, gets back in touch, DO NOT start talking to her about your relationship right away! Even if she desperately wants you back, she's probably not ready to talk about the break-up, and again you dont want to rush and seem needy/clingy as well.
Instead, pretend as if you had never dated and treat her purely as an old friend. This will help you to chill and allow you to gradually nudge her towards reconciliation rather than running the risk of scaring her away.
Remember why you guys went cold or broke up (if shes a gf) in the first place, so you can learn from your own mistakes.
Not every girl is prone to fall for you just because she is jealous, try a better way - talk to her. Being distant and MIA is beta and there are better ways to handle it. Be congruent to whatever intention you have, and be cool.
Just be patient, dont expect anything, dont rush, and most of all, dont change yourself for their sake.
Here goes...
Cut off communication - This is probably the toughest step as you'll be waiting and wanting to get a reaction out of her, but really it's tougher on her. She's starting to realize how much she liked you and how good she felt around you, and how much she misses you. Dont go overboard with this - dont avoid her, turn the other way when you see her coming down the hall lol, just live your life as if nothing has happened. Cutting off communication is the biggest step.
Start talking to other girls - Honestly this helps for so many reasons. It will get your mind off of the trivial things and keep you from overanalyzing things that all of the other chicks you are spitting game at will do to test you. ALso the girl who went cold on you will probably start to notice and see youre gettin on and having fun living. She will find out that you're talking to this girl, and it will get her back to you. **Use this idea with caution as it may give the wrong signals, such as a sign that she should see move on because you have.**
Recover Emotionally - Particularly if this is a chick youve known for a while and were tryin to have something more with, you don't have a chance of getting her interested again if you're not emotionally calm and controlled. Women dislike needy, clingy, desperate men - so you need to pull your own life together and continue to go out and LIVE before attempting to attract her again.
Act like nothing is wrong - Because nothing should be wrong, shes just one girl who you could easily find a replacement for but may decide you dont want to. The lady will not be interested in you again if you're acting depressed. It will turn her away. Think about it like this ..... if you are a DJ you will have previously shown her that she is there as a bonus in your life to add fun. Acting depressed will lead her to think that you are clingy and consider her a defining characteristic in your life, which honestly she shouldnt be.
Look your best - Make sure your acne is gone, get yourself shaped up, and looking good. She won't be able to resist
The girl will likely contact you. Even if it takes a week or more, she is going to text you or call you. When she does this, you know your mission is accomplished. Now that youve got her interested again, bring back your charm that won her in the first place.
The best way to reconnect with her is to invite her for something fun and non threatening. You dont want to get her alone yet. This assures her that you won't overstay your welcome - maybe lunch or something since both of you have to go back to work afterwards. Plus, if the meeting goes well, it provides a great opportunity to leave her begging for more!
Once you're back into each other and have some more "dates" under your belt, sit down and discuss the issues that led to the coldness or even the break-up if this was a girl you were going out with, and how you're going to avoid them this time. There's no point going back into a relationship only to see it fall apart over the same problems a month down the line.
words for the wise....
When the girl or in some cases if the girl is your ex, gets back in touch, DO NOT start talking to her about your relationship right away! Even if she desperately wants you back, she's probably not ready to talk about the break-up, and again you dont want to rush and seem needy/clingy as well.
Instead, pretend as if you had never dated and treat her purely as an old friend. This will help you to chill and allow you to gradually nudge her towards reconciliation rather than running the risk of scaring her away.
Remember why you guys went cold or broke up (if shes a gf) in the first place, so you can learn from your own mistakes.
Not every girl is prone to fall for you just because she is jealous, try a better way - talk to her. Being distant and MIA is beta and there are better ways to handle it. Be congruent to whatever intention you have, and be cool.
Just be patient, dont expect anything, dont rush, and most of all, dont change yourself for their sake.