I want it to be special...?

[konig87]

Hey guys,

This girl i've known for a long time in college has had a bf. They broke up recently but still our "in a relationship" on facebook...idk...Anyways...I am recently single as well and we both "found out" at the bars that we both had crushes on each other like this whole year...

Anyways, we have been hanging out and kissing on a few dates and I've expressed my interest in her, and kept it sexual and flirty..

She ends up coming over to my party and at the end of the night it get super heated we are in my room tearing our clothes off and then I pull off her panties, and shes all "i'm not going all the way with you" and i'm kinda like huh? and i have like a confused look on my face...and I'm like I don't get it blah blah, and shes all " I want it to be special" and then she laughs and shes like I cant believe I just said that yada yada...

Well we end up doing oral or w/e and afterwards she says that she always puts out to soon with her previous boyfriends and that she wants to take it slo with me...and that she dosen't want to be in a committed relationship...

anyways, am I reading into this too much? My gut feeling keeps telling me she isn't into me enough to completely seperate herself from her "ex" and I told her something to that extent and she said it wasn't the case...but I am unsure. I never said anything about being official, she shot it down before I even considered us dating which maybe she just thinks weird or something...anyways today ( a day later) she wants to hang out again and go kayaking with me and acts like everythings normal...

any similar situations/advice or interpreations or am i just over-thinking?

 

[DJ SO STEVE]

What I've come to realize in life is that if you want to be in a relationship with a girl. Its always better for her to like you more than you like her. Once you mention that you are more interested in her, the ball is in her park, and its her call.

She told you she doesn't want to be in a committed relationship, it could either mean you are not the right guy or she really doesn't want a relationship because she just got out of one.

Best thing for you to do is keep trying to get closer till you nail her. Forget about kayaking, you don't want to become her "friend". Go to bars with her, get her horny and try to score.

You should be meeting other women at the same time, she could get jealous and try to get you to commit to her.

Peace.

 

[Iceberg]

I can't count how many girls I've banged after listening to their corny "we shouldn't do this" excuses.

She'll come around, unless you start acting all clingy.

The only thing I consistently did with all of the girls in my experience was ignore those stupid comments. We'd be in bed messing around, a girl would say "We shouldn't have sex." and I'd say "Yeah that's cool.", keep fingering her, etc, and next thing you know, she's so horny, she gives it up anyway. Might not happen on the first occasion, but by #2, they're ready.

 

[badboyjmm]

I can't count how many girls I've banged after listening to their corny "we shouldn't do this" excuses.

She'll come around, unless you start acting all clingy.

The only thing I consistently did with all of the girls in my experience was ignore those stupid comments. We'd be in bed messing around, a girl would say "We shouldn't have sex." and I'd say "Yeah that's cool.", keep fingering her, etc, and next thing you know, she's so horny, she gives it up anyway. Might not happen on the first occasion, but by #2, they're ready.

That's so true !!

And for OP, I've been in a situation where I was going out with a chick, but when it was time to get down to business there's was always an excuse ... And I've listen ! Silly me, I didn't get sh!t and I got mad so I broke up !!! Just go for it and have fun doing her !

 

[konig87]

thx guys. i definitely feel the need to pull (as opposed to pushing) back for awhile as we have been together frequently. there are some other girls I put on hold that I can do things with as well...

i think the issue I'm having is I was always the prize in my previous thing, and this girl has been spinning it as her constantly qualifying me. I need to flip the positiononing here so that its not my qualities on trial for her judgement.