I want her back - well ... sort of !?

[crotchrocket]

... I took a 'break' from my g/f (we dated a year), then a week later - restored almost everything (except 'official' status).
... next week+ was good - things were on the mend ...
THEN she calls me, tearful voice and breaks it off with me, for good (or so I thought).

... two weeks go by ... SHE calls me (I quote) "just calling to see how you're doing! ... what you've been up to ..." (with a somber/remorseful/'I miss you' tone in her voice).

I'm not all broken-hearted (like she sounded) which probably helped my cause for gettin her back someday ...
Now I'm not sure where to go from here !?

I'm going to give her a pre-Vday call, just as a 'reminder' of what/who she's missing out on (I've heard through the grapevine she's NOT in a 'happy place' Re; V-day). So I thought I'd just 'help' that out a little !

Is it a good idea to use the 'just friends' attitude with her now?
Does it make someone 'want what they can't have' more?
Or does it always backfire?

I'm dating another girl, and have another girl or so - 'interested' so my "who gives a sh!t?" attitude won't need to be faked - well ... not completely anyways...

Just wondered what everybody thinks the 'rules' should be in this case?
I want her back - someday - and on my terms... so any help is appreciated.

 

[DJDamage]

THEN she calls me, tearful voice and breaks it off with me, for good (or so I thought).

I want her back - someday - and on my terms... so any help is appreciated.

Sounds to me as if she is calling all the shots and you jump for joy every time she wants you back like a pig about to hit the mud pool. Where is your dignity, respect and worthiness?? She just throw you to the trash because she thinks she can do better and instead of dusting yourself off and moving on to a higher and more respectable pasture, she ends up coming back to the trash and finds you exectly where she left you.

As a result of her having all the power and you losing it all, coming back to her will only going to make her less respect you again and probably dump you again and this whole cycle will repeat itself. That is fine if you are looking to fvck her for the short term (with no emotional attachment involved) but if you are thinking LTR or marriage then you must be a maschoist because it ain't going to be fun.

Once its over its over don't go back and move on.

 

[Chosen1]

Well, it sounds to me that she is still digging you. Most girls are flakey and would forget about you soon after meeting you. You and DJDamage make a good point. Don't let her have to much control. You should probably not call her until after Valentines to let her know she is not as important as she used to be.

But if I were you I would invite her to dinner and "catch up". Tell her you are in a relationship but you would still like to be friends. Thats where you had and good Idea, crotch rocket.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

DJ Damage hit it perfectly!!! Its good that you've got a few other women your working on, but its completely obvious that your exgf controls your thoughts. She has all the power, and she KNOWS SHE CAN LEAVE YOU, THEN COME BACK WITHOUT ANY REPERCUSSIONS!! This my friend is called a lack of self-respect.

I seriously don't understand why guys waste so much time in their lives planning and plotting the perfect scheme to get their ex back, or make their ex like them again. Wanna know the best way to get her back?? Move on and live life!!! Its hard letting go of long term relationships, but you HAVE TO! Even if you do get back together with her again, she won't have respect for you because your a pure chump bag around her.

This chick owns you and you know it. Get over it and move on.




PIMP

 

[Last Man Standing]

She sucked another dudes pinnacle and he tossed her aside like the hor that she is and now she comes back to you???? Say "No" to hos!!!!!

 

[SuSHI]

I didn't read everyone else's response but i can tell you something like this happened to me. Actaully its the exact situation, only we got back and broke off for about 4-5 months. But the circumstances were different, and most of the break ups were due to outside forces (Her parents and distance). But one thing is true, no matter how hard the situation is, even close to impossible, if she wants to end it, and you give her one more chance, and still things end. Don't take her back.

At least not for a long long time, until she matures, if ever that happens. DOn't fall in that trap man, let her be, let her see what shes missing out on.

 

[Pakwah]

Dude, don't give her nothing. Read my story first. In fact be as evasive and busy as you can possibly be. Girls like jerks and *******s cuz they are unpredictable, not boring and dont take crap. So be like one.