I Want A "Guy," With "Goals," and "Ambition"

[MightyMate]

Yes they do want that.

 

[jonwon]

Jonwon, said:Why would you consider this loser behavior ??

I think this is a level that all people should strive for.

Nice, we should all start living our lives based on what women are attracted to..very trendy !


Or we could just leave women to their own vices and not worry about trying to one up them in some sort of weird game.

I don't understand this statement.

- Vulpine AGREED !!!

I think you miss understood my message i was putting forward.

It is not looser behavour, thats the whole point, but trying telling that to the female walking in the door with the nice rack!! There is nothing wrong with settling for your own ideals in life, but sadly if you want the chance to date more women or have an higher % then you have to settle in a frame where women at least see you with social worth. So again it depends on where you want to be.

No ones telling you to do anything, do what ever you want, but me sadly i like pus*y so i make steps in my life to ensure i am seperated from as much of the BS as possible and simply that is getting perks in sociaty! To deny i dont want puss* is not going happen, granted women values are not the best, but still i recognize them for what they are, with that i can shift it to my favour, that was the point. But if women are not apart of your goal, then do what you want, sadly most men want pus**y at some stage, at least by working towards certain values, feminine inspired or not, you can put yourself on a certain value scale.

The about the budding artist, is he already as value since being an artist is considered cool, it comes with a perk already, i.e social value, a great tool to hold up to her mates and say 'hey i am dating an artist' that was the point.

Money is a factor this is a no brainer, but there is alot more going on and it mainly slots into how a man makes her look to:

Her mates.
Her family (not always the case)
Her mates.
People in the street.

This does not mean going out with a poor hunk this means as the picture shows above, choosing a man she can dangle to her mates and show she is better, thats fundimentally what women 'want' granted they settle for less but they will always be looking for the man to tie down that has higher value then at least her nearest buddies.

No one is telling you to worship pus** on the contrary, what i am trying to say, is if you want it, then you need to play them at there own game.

I.e if your a burger flipper you better have some very cool pastime that as value to her mates, or you better be the best and hottest burger flipper in the shop i.e attracting the women who are flipping burgers with you.

The higher women get the less they look down, women mainly look up, where as a man is not so fickle.

Rich men settle for poor pig women all the time, men want feminine grace, women want masculine, social worth and anything her mates have.

The good thing in all this.

When your some 60 year old rich dude, well at least you will fuc*ing some fine 21 years olds.

hugh effner (spelling) anyone!

Do old goat women get that, do they fuc*.

 

[edger]

I can't believe some of the responses...hasn't it been mentioned that money means crap to women, and just look around you, haven't you observed this on the outside? With cerntainty I have, and still do. This is another bullsh*t fed societal stigma, just like the AFC type NICE guy stigma. When women say they want a guy with goals and a "good" paying job, it's equivalent to when they say they want an AFC type nice guy, hence what women say they want and what they do, are 2 different things..isn't this something we're supposed to be aware of?..so the same thing applies to when they say they want a guy with goals and money. I can easily right off the bat name a dozen people and more who are friends of mine, friends of friends, aquaintences, and people who I've been friends with in the past who don't make much money or who work in minimum wage jobs, who are married to, or are in relationships with some of the finest-sexy looking women. Money isn't what creates attraction, it's how tight your GAME is, and how much of a DJ you are that's gonna determine if she wants to get into a relationship with you. That's why you'll even see unemployed guys get into relationships with hot women. But don't get me wrong, if a woman comes across 2 DJ's who she likes equally, one with a minimum wage paying job and the other with a high paying job, yea, she's probably most likely gonna end up choosing the guy with the higher paying job for a relationship. A woman would rather have a guy who has a good paying job and goals in his life, sounds most logical to me, but she's not going to disqualify you if you don't. I strongly digress with those of you who claim a "good paying job and goals" is a determining factor for her getting into a relationship with you, because I see the opposite of that all the time.

 

[Phyzzle]

I gotta agree with Edger.

This site was largely founded by guys who got sick of watching unemployed potheads, wife-beaters, ex-cons, alcoholics, and compulsive liars getting laid like Motley Crue while they sat around with their doctoral degrees and their virginity.

Money will get you a wife who spends all your cash on her boyfriend while you're out at work. A lot of money gets you a shot with certain women you might otherwise not have a shot with, but it won't give you a second date. (Ask me how I know.)

Especially with college hotties, it's like they penalize you for being successful. The just wanna have fun. They're not looking for a spot in the upper middle class. They're looking to bang the bass player.

 

[Latinoman]

I can't believe some of the responses...hasn't it been mentioned that money means crap to women, and just look around you, haven't you observed this on the outside? With cerntainty I have, and still do. This is another bullsh*t fed societal stigma, just like the AFC type NICE guy stigma. When women say they want a guy with goals and a "good" paying job, it's equivalent to when they say they want an AFC type nice guy, hence what women say they want and what they do, are 2 different things..isn't this something we're supposed to be aware of?..so the same thing applies to when they say they want a guy with goals and money. I can easily right off the bat name a dozen people and more who are friends of mine, friends of friends, aquaintences, and people who I've been friends with in the past who don't make much money or who work in minimum wage jobs, who are married to, or are in relationships with some of the finest-sexy looking women. Money isn't what creates attraction, it's how tight your GAME is, and how much of a DJ you are that's gonna determine if she wants to get into a relationship with you. That's why you'll even see unemployed guys get into relationships with hot women. But don't get me wrong, if a woman comes across 2 DJ's who she likes equally, one with a minimum wage paying job and the other with a high paying job, yea, she's probably most likely gonna end up choosing the guy with the higher paying job for a relationship. A woman would rather have a guy who has a good paying job and goals in his life, sounds most logical to me, but she's not going to disqualify you if you don't. I strongly digress with those of you who claim a "good paying job and goals" is a determining factor for her getting into a relationship with you, because I see the opposite of that all the time.

Make no mistake...one of the MAIN reasons there are a lot of marriage problems today is due to ECONOMICAL issues.

Money does matter...because as women age...they tend to spend CONSIDERABLY more $$$ in order to get the Lacome or her hair or to cover their physical defects. Also...if you have children...it matters even more. Money matters because it sets you FREE and allows you to do whatever you want. "Having fun" is not CHEAP nor FREE.

A good paying job (or relatively good paying job) and goals is a determine factor on KEEPING that woman for a VERY VERY LONG time. A woman in her early 20s might not care as much...but when she start turning into her late 20s and 30s...she will.

Of course, I'm talking about marriage and LTR.

 

[squirrels]

Ambition breeds things like wealth and power.

Anyone with ANY ounce of ambition would not be working at McDonalds, unless they had plans to somehow move up and take over the company or something.

If you were the type of person to work at McDonalds for the rest of your life, I probably wouldn't want to associate with you either.

 

[cockydude]

Its funny, i was thinking about posting lately on this exact same topic when i came across this thread. I am in a 4 month long (hopefully to be longer) LTR. She is the best girl i have ever come across. She is very intelligent, has high morals and standards, has an excellent job, and absolutely loves to be with me. We have spent a lot of time together since we met (online believe it or not) back in October last year. Many times during our time together she has said things like " i have never felt this way about someone before" and, "i have never done this before with someone". I was taking it pretty easy and C/F for the first month and a half of the relationship (or at least TRYING to), because i was under the impression she was only looking for dating material. But i began to realize that she was viewing (and evaluating) me for marriage/LTR material. She calls me often, and we spend at least 4-5 nights a week together, staying at each other's place, etc.

Now, the one and ONLY drawback to this relationship, is that because she is a very focused, goal oriented woman (she is 25/i am 31), her ability to be 'the woman' is a little dulled, i think. It also has to do with family and life issues, but it is very difficult to get her to talk about serious stuff (ie. us). She has opened up to me quite a bit over the last couple months, and i have learned a lot more about her as a person.

So, here is my point.

She has been a little distant sometimes lately, and i have called her on it so we could talk, but it has been difficult. She says she wants to have time to think about what it is, and exactly how to bring it up. BUT she has dropped hints here and there during our bedtime discussions about how she wants me to have 'more clearly defined goals'. Now, i cant say i blame her, BUT.......i AM taking college courses to improve my employability, (not that i dont make decent money, i have been at my job for 2 1/2 years and have been promoted quickly) and i am starting to really 'jump' on my life so to speak, since we have been together. But she is implying that she may end up looking at me as only dating material and nothing more, despite EVERYTHING we have together and the fact she is quite in love with me. During our conversations, both of us have agreed that we havent come across someone like each other in a very long time, and the LT possibilities have been discussed (or at least hinted at) , often.


So guys, sorry if i jacked this thread, but i figured it was the perfect one to discuss this in. What do i do? I feel about her like i have never felt about a woman in my life. She has everything i want in a partner, and (sorry if this sounds AFC) but i would marry her in an instant.

What do i do?? Advice?


CD

 

[cockydude]

Its funny, i was thinking about posting lately on this exact same topic when i came across this thread. I am in a 4 month long (hopefully to be longer) LTR. She is the best girl i have ever come across. She is very intelligent, has high morals and standards, has an excellent job, and absolutely loves to be with me. We have spent a lot of time together since we met (online believe it or not) back in October last year. Many times during our time together she has said things like " i have never felt this way about someone before" and, "i have never done this before with someone". I was taking it pretty easy and C/F for the first month and a half of the relationship (or at least TRYING to), because i was under the impression she was only looking for dating material. But i began to realize that she was viewing (and evaluating) me for marriage material. She calls me often, and we spend at least 4-5 nights a week together, staying at each other's place, etc.

Now, the one and ONLY drawback to this relationship, is that because she is a very focused, goal oriented woman (she is 25/i am 31), her ability to be 'the woman' is a little dulled, i think. It also has to do with family and life issues, but it is very difficult to get her to talk about serious stuff (ie. us). She has opened up to me quite a bit over the last couple months, and i have learned a lot more about her as a person.

So, here is my point.

She has been a little distant sometimes lately, and i have called her on it so we could talk, but it has been difficult. She says she wants to have time to think about what it is, and exactly how to bring it up. BUT she has dropped hints here and there during our bedtime discussions about how she wants me to have 'more clearly defined goals'. Now, i cant say i blame her, BUT.......i AM taking college courses to improve my employability, (not that i dont make decent money, i have been at my job for 2 1/2 years and have been promoted quickly) and i am starting to really jump on my life so to speak, since we have been together. But she is implying that she may end up looking at me as only dating material and nothing more, despite EVERYTHING we have together and the fact she is quite in love with me. During our conversations, both of us have agreed that we havent come across someone like each other in a very long time, and the LT possibilities have been discussed (or at least hinted at) , often.


So guys, sorry if i jacked this thread, but i figured it was the perfect one to discuss this in. What do i do? I feel about her like i have never felt about a woman in my life. She has everything i want in a partner, and (sorry if this sounds AFC) but i would marry her in an instant.

What do i do?? Advice?


CD

 

[Latinoman]

Taking college courses to improve your employability is a great start IMO.


That's the only thing I can comment without knowing ANYTHING about you (do you have a College degree? Do you have a career? Do you have...?).

All that said...if she only wants "Dating Material" and NOT LTR material...then guess what? Even better for you!

Remember...the one that propose marriage is the man. Why the rush?

Focus on your career...heck, you might want to listen what she has to say? But at the end...YOU decide what's BEST for YOU. After all, she is NOT your wife. And you are the more mature person in the relationship...lead as such (unless you truly need to get your sh_it together...in which case...)

Another thing...do what's best for you. You are the PRIZE!

 

[edger]

A good paying job (or relatively good paying job) and goals is a determine factor on KEEPING that woman for a VERY VERY LONG time. A woman in her early 20s might not care as much...but when she start turning into her late 20s and 30s...she will.

Of course, I'm talking about marriage and LTR.

I can only testify to what I've seen and observed on the outside, and what I've seen has been quite the opposite of what you're claiming. Like I said I can name many guys who've landed serious long-term relationships/marriages with beautiful women who were in their late 20's -30's while the men had little to nothing in their pockets.

And on the same note, if a chick wasn't willing to stick by her man in times of financial struggle, then what good is she? A woman who's really into her man will stick by him through thick and through thin.

Latinoman, we both know how POWERFUL a woman's emotions are, right? We know they tend to override a lot of things, right? So, when a woman is really into a guy, she could care less how much money he has. As long as he gives her that emotional high is what matters to her. The DJ is able to provide her with something BIGGER and more fulfilling than money. Makes sense to me.

 

[cockydude]

@Latinoman,

No, I dont have a college degree or anything like that, but I do make decent money doing tech work for a stable company, with advancement opportunity. I make enough that I have been pre approved for a mortgage in the last few months for a place big enough for both of us if need be, so im doing okay. Would i like to be doing better? Hell yeah, thats why i am trying to get some more credentials under my belt and move forward with my life. She also said in one of our conversations lately that she 'doesnt know if i am where she needs me to be' in life. So yeah, i have been a little bit on edge lately with this. Although, it would seem with women especially, that actions speak louder than words, and despite some of the things she has said lately and the bit of cool attitude i have felt, that hasnt stopped her from giving me a massage and cuddling up and good sex the other night and a few other nights this week. So, maybe i am overanalyzing? I really do seem to have a habit of doing that, family and friends will attest to that. And on a side note, @Edger, your words make sense man, and I hope that they apply to my situation.

Forgive me if i am rambling, but its late and im tired

 

[Drum&Bass]

People only get angry about the things you're talking about when they're being defensive about it. When they're kind of ashamed or embarassed about it. If you get mad about a woman asking you what you do for a living, are you mad about the question generally as an issue of equality, or are you simply not proud of what you do?

Guys don't like being asked this question NOT because we're ashamed of what we do, we just know a woman could care less about our jobs, she just wants to know how much money we make.

Imagine you hit it off with a girl and she's hot and you can tell she thinks your hot, she's smart got goals, your smart and you got goals..everything is running smoothely, until she asks what you do, now imagine you told her your still a student, or your doing a sh!t job now until you can get started in your career,in her mind she's gonna think....what a loser, NEXT...
and your already dismissed without her even knowing anything real about you...its not that we're embarrassed, we don't want to be un-fairly judged.

I guess its a good way to weed out women who are not worthwhile but its insulting and cuts into your pride.

 

[WaterTiger]

Imagine you hit it off with a girl and she's hot and you can tell she thinks your hot, she's smart got goals, your smart and you got goals..everything is running smoothely, until she asks what you do, now imagine you told her your still a student, or your doing a sh!t job now until you can get started in your career,in her mind she's gonna think....what a loser, NEXT...
and your already dismissed without her even knowing anything real about you...its not that we're embarrassed, we don't want to be un-fairly judged.

If some girl nexts you that quick, then she is stupid. Working TOWARDS a high goal is a wonderful thing in a person. By nexting you she shows her true colors. She's a spoiled little brat stomping her foot and saying:"Now! I want it Now! NOW! NOW!"

 

[MatureDJ]

If some girl nexts you that quick, then she is stupid. Working TOWARDS a high goal is a wonderful thing in a person. By nexting you she shows her true colors. She's a spoiled little brat stomping her foot and saying:"Now! I want it Now! NOW! NOW!"

There is the essential result of a person's choice as to getting immediate gratification, or delaying such gratification. The young man that decides, after finishing high school, to "get loaded every night" generally becomes a bum, whereas the young man that decides to get a college education becomes a success. The young maiden that decides to go for the cool jerk generally becomes a single mother, whereas the young maiden that waits to meet a proper man becomes a mother of a stable family.

 

[Hitman10000]

Just because he's content with working at McDonald's, being a mechanic, working at Jiffy lube, or the comic book place doesn't mean he would be a bad boyfriend.

Go to www.yahooregs.com to see these chicks. You'll quickly find out that that most of them have one thing in common.

I don't know how the heck you equate a skilled mechanic who is making from $20+/hr to some ex-con at McDs or a fat comic geek at $5+/hr.

If you don't have skills, concrete real skills people need, your value is low!

And that loser Motley Crue example. He is trash and gets trash women. The person that uses the "bad boy" as an example is deluded in the sense that Motley Crue in reality is one f*cked up sob who has a couple of STDS lying in the wake. Of course he gets a lot of women, a lot of drugged up alcoholics for that one.

Low quality men get low quality women (When I say low quality it is by no means a judgement of their perceptive looks or how much money they make but their entire character makeup.)

 

[Latinoman]

I can only testify to what I've seen and observed on the outside, and what I've seen has been quite the opposite of what you're claiming. Like I said I can name many guys who've landed serious long-term relationships/marriages with beautiful women who were in their late 20's -30's while the men had little to nothing in their pockets.

And on the same note, if a chick wasn't willing to stick by her man in times of financial struggle, then what good is she? A woman who's really into her man will stick by him through thick and through thin.

But I bet that in most of those relationships the man was either going to school or getting trained or working toward a better life. The man had a future or some goals.

Now, this is assuming that the woman had "choices" too (e.g. Rollo Tomasi's is a great example...he had a future...his current wife was dating him and had the change to be with some $$$$ doctors...she picked him. Rollo was masculine and he had GOALS and POTENTIAL. She had choices and choose him.).


Do you know what's the easiest way to seduce a woman (ANY woman)? It is by making her believe you can provide her with something exiting that is currently lacking in her life. And do you know who are the ones that are the EASIEST to seduce? The ones that are either unhappy about something.

 

[Latinoman]

@Latinoman,

She also said in one of our conversations lately that she 'doesnt know if i am where she needs me to be' in life.

LOL. Is she your career mentor? Is she your boss? Is she your employer?

If a woman tells me such a thing (even if I love her), my response would be:

”Listen, I am in my 30s. You still 25. I don’t expect you to know anything about my path. My primary goal is to be happy. You are not here to make me happy as I don’t need any woman to make me happy. You are here to ENHANCE that happiness as I can only associate with people that bring positivism into my life. And I'm here to enhance yours. I appreciate you worry about my future. I truly do. But I hope you are not trying to ‘influence’ me into shaping MY future to satisfy YOUR own. After all, that would be a very selfish goal and I’m not sure I would want a future with a selfish woman. Fortunately, you are not the selfish type. Correct?”


My friend...there is NOTHING wrong with you. The problem here is HER.

 

[edger]

But I bet that in most of those relationships the man was either going to school or getting trained or working toward a better life. The man had a future or some goals.

Nope, many of those men had/have no particular goals.

Do you know what's the easiest way to seduce a woman (ANY woman)? It is by making her believe you can provide her with something exiting that is currently lacking in her life. And do you know who are the ones that are the EASIEST to seduce? The ones that are either unhappy about something.

That's what I said. Providing her with EXCITEMENT and emotionally bonding her to you is the key and is all that matters, not money. And yes, the ones who are unhappy are also very easy to seduce, agreed.