I think this is all BS !!

[rswarren]

I want to start off by saying that these are my opinions and mine alone.


Everyone on this site talks about the "alpha male" getting all the chicks. I think this one is laughable.

Lets put it in perspective here. Taking me for example.

I am 5'9... athletic body. 170 lbs. Good- looking. I wrestle, do brazilian jiujitsu and have done a few cage fights. I am enrolled in college and run my own web site business. I leave for the army in february and plan on becoming an army ranger. This seems pretty alpha to me and yet I am looking at porn every night.

Also the girls around my college campus, I see them holding hands with skinny, pothead looking, sandal wearing metrosexuals. They get more ***** then I do and they certaintly dont seem like " alpha males" to me.


Now I also dress decent, speak well and I am smart. but still NO *****.


Is this "alpha male" thing a myth or is it just true with older women?



Also :


It seems to me there are so many rules to picking up women its just an effort in itself. Think about it.

You have to make sure your ****y and funny
Make sure you keep mystery
Make sure to crack jokes
Make sure to touch
Dont give too much info away etc. etc.

Think about it there are so many rules to follow its such an effort to pick up girls that it makes it seem if it is even worth it.



This is just my $0.02

 

[tristan22]

I haven't read a good post like this in ages around here. I think everyone wonders "why" when they see some tool bag with a hot girl. Especially, if your a dam good looking guy and the only action your getting, is from pictures on the internet.

Someone posted a message not to long ago that stated "90% of guys are terrible with women, yet 10% seem to get more then enough women and even they have no clue as to how they are landing the hotties."

I have to work my a$$ to get girls and i'm a good looking guy. It's almost like being good looking is a double edge sword. People assume that you are arrogant or into yourself, because your a good looking guy. I have been called self-centered by females who i didn't even converse with-- it's crazy!

You seem like you have a lot going for you, so i don't know exactly why your not landing the hotties?


........actually a friend of mine, breaks every rule that SS tries to enforce (flowers, skinny as a toothpick, and AFC behavior), yet this guy bangs some of the hottest girls. It amazes the $hit out of me!

 

[everywomanshero]

I'll tell you why

Some ideas. Of course, some or none of these may apply to you. I wouldn't know.

You have to be FUN. Women cannot get away from a boring guy fast enough. They really will take a cool, OK looking guy over a hotter, boring guy 9 times out of 10.

Work on being funny. If you're uptight, then get a massage and let loose. Be a fun person. Be relaxed.

Never ever never tell women how to live their lives. Just listen and comment on what they say. Preaching will become your undoing and you'll never even realize you're doing it.

You have to approach them. This may not always be true but it will be true the overwhelming majority of the time.
The main difference between success and failure is how often you interact with women and if you're willing to try extracting or asking for a night out with her.

 

[Alphathree]

Alpha male is a mindset not a physical condition. You've simply misunderstood the definition.

Also a lot of those sandal wearing dorks are just lucky-- there are many more who have no women at all. This is a classic example of incomplete information in critical thinking, but I won't go there. Read "How We Know What Isn't So"

Anyway, as for the rest of your post, it sounds like you're blaming "reality" because you can't get any women. Try blaming yourself. It's far more productive. You have what's called an external locus of control, and that's not healthy for many reasons that I also won't get into.

To directly respond to your comments:

"You have to make sure your ****y and funny"

I disagree completely, but many others here swear by blurting out canned C&F. Just be geunine.

"Make sure you keep mystery"

If you believe you are the prize, you won't feel the need to qualify yourself by talking about yourself, and the mystery will happen automatically.

"Make sure to crack jokes"

Disagree completely.

"Make sure to touch"

If you do this naturally to everyone all the time as a method for establishing deeper rapport with people, then you will also automatically do it to attractive women.

"Dont give too much info away etc. etc."

See my response to being mysterious.

 

[SamePendo]

What is the purpose of your post?

 

[newbeginning]

you forgot one little detail. THEY GO FOR IT head first and you just sit here and complain. If you want something in life you gotta go get it yoruself bro. Unless you're tom cruz, you're gonna have to get down and dirty. Anyhow, im on the same boat so i'll shut the **** up now. lol

 

[TxCowboy]

sounds like you try way to hard ... if a girl can sense that ... ur doomed ...

its all about your personality and DJ skills - looks, money, etc ... are all a plus , but u gotta have game

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

why so many responses? you guys are taking too serious what some newbiezzi with 1 post has to say!

personally I think he could be a troll account of the many haters out there!

 

[Brak86]

Originally posted by rswarren
I want to start off by saying that these are my opinions and mine alone.


Everyone on this site talks about the "alpha male" getting all the chicks. I think this one is laughable.

Lets put it in perspective here. Taking me for example.

I am 5'9... athletic body. 170 lbs. Good- looking. I wrestle, do brazilian jiujitsu and have done a few cage fights. I am enrolled in college and run my own web site business. I leave for the army in february and plan on becoming an army ranger. This seems pretty alpha to me and yet I am looking at porn every night.

Also the girls around my college campus, I see them holding hands with skinny, pothead looking, sandal wearing metrosexuals. They get more ***** then I do and they certaintly dont seem like " alpha males" to me.


Now I also dress decent, speak well and I am smart. but still NO *****.


Is this "alpha male" thing a myth or is it just true with older women?



Also :


It seems to me there are so many rules to picking up women its just an effort in itself. Think about it.

You have to make sure your ****y and funny
Make sure you keep mystery
Make sure to crack jokes
Make sure to touch
Dont give too much info away etc. etc.

Think about it there are so many rules to follow its such an effort to pick up girls that it makes it seem if it is even worth it.



This is just my $0.02

I am exactly like you. I am the VP of student council, i was almost nominated for homecoming king (but i cant since imn on the SC), i have the best body in the grade, black hair, blue eyes. ETC. But i, like you, see other uglier guys get chicks. Well, let me tell you somnething. Its your fault. Just like it is mine. Im working on changing myself and you have to realize that its our mindset, our lack of trying that is holding us back. I bet you dont even try to get chicks, yet you're expecting them to drool all over you. And maybet hey are, but girls are 10x more scared than guys of rejection. Put your balls to the wall and go out and try, cause i know thats where im heading.

 

[pimpfromdayone]

Instead of complaining (which I have a problem with myself), just try to understand HOW those guys are successful. Yeah, they are sandal-wearing fag-gots, but they must be doing something right. They probably get lucky because they have a large social circle... most guys meet women through friends or social gatherings with their friends.
And yes, basically half the campus is made up of potheads, haha. Funny thing about the potheads though.... they don't really worry about anything, they are pretty funny most of the time, and they don't really seem to have that much interest in women, they have a lot of friends, and this is what makes most of them successful.

About your comments regarding the advice from the site:

Being coc-ky and funny is not something you should be faking. It isn't a technique, but a mindset. You should learn to be fun and super-confident, and with this, learn how to tease women, they love it. If you aren't man enough to do this, someone else is. Women don't want some boring guy with a dull personality. Basically, the worst thing you can be is boring, followed by being too nice to them (they subconsciously see you as a pushover, whether you are or you aren't).

Mystery is just something that can help. Many people take it too far and think that they will be mysterious and therefore attract the women if they don't talk to them at all.... obviously that gets you nowhere. Instead, you should just keep the girl intrigued by keeping a lot of info to yourself. If you tell her your life story the first day you meet her, she isn't left with much to wonder about you, and you will get boring pretty quick. Basically, never talk a lot about yourself, and don't feel obligated to answer all her personal questions. Let her learn for herself what kind of a man you are.

Cracking jokes is just a part of being funny. If you have no sense of humor, you probably won't make it far. Nobody wants to be with someone really boring like that. Now, don't sit there trying to impress her or entertain her, but show your sense of humor as much as you want. You don't have to be funny all the time either, and in fact, you probably shouldn't be.

Touching is supposedly the most powerful thing you can do to a woman. Have you had certain women rub up against you, "accidentally" touch their knee or foot to yours, or even just touch you casually with their hand? Then you should know first-hand that being touched is pretty powerful. Use this "weapon" on women, but try to be as casual as possible. You can get by with not touching on the first approach or whatever, but during your first real meeting with the girl, you should touch her.

These are NOT rules. They are merely guidelines. The average guy that comes on this board is used to kissing women's asses, calling them constantly, acting possessive, and basically doing all the things that women are repulsed by. You don't have to change who you are entirely, and you can still be a genuinely nice person, but if you want attractive women, you gotta learn to be an attractive man. Now I'm not going to sit here and explain how to be attractive.... read the rest of the message boards, observe some successful friends of yours, go out and get some experience, but you get the basic idea.

Finally, let me tell you that the ONE thing that is holding you back right now is your negative attitude. You're just like I was. I used to despise the idiot men who had the girls, and I hated all the dumb-ass girls who liked them, but now I am above that. I used to look at these couples, feel my heart sink again, and think to myself:
"That guy is such a stoner, and that girl is a dumb bit-ch for dating someone like him." Is this similar to your thoughts?
And now I just look at these people and think nothing of it, or maybe sometimes I think to myself how the girl I end up with is going to be so much better than that girl. You have to be positive. If you think negatively all the time, women will pick up on it. Being alpha male is actually what you should aim for in this game, but you can't let your ego get in the way. You should be really confident and love yourself, but don't go around acting like nobody is good enough for you. To a certain extent, you have to meet them halfway. I can kinda tell that you have an ego that might be messing you up. I can relate. All I can tell you is to start thinking more positively about others and your own situation, and things should get better.

 

[rswarren]

I made this post as a rant/ convo starter. To point out that you can have alot going for you but still not have woman sorrounding you. ( or is it surrounding)

When I wrote out my original post I looked at it and got a confidence boost and realized ... hey ! I do have alot going for me, I should be baggin chicks.

Let me give everyone some background information.

I met this girl by luck on the internet one day by her accidentally messing up the #'s in an aol screenname

I was in a two year relationship with her ,which just ended recently. The relationship was great for the first 6 months until she became a whiny, nagging, selfish *****. I tried to brake up with her 3x but ended up coming back to her within 24 hours because I realized that I would be alone. ( AFC) This relationship was hell for me. I constantly wanted to end it but was always sucked back in by the fear of being alone. For about 1 year and a half I was actually trying to pursue other girls while in this relationship for an excuse to get out.


I finally got the spine to break up with her to enjoy my last semester in college before I leave for the army.

Now that I am alone it feels awesome. I see so many hot girls around and have tried a few approaches so far but no luck. I got a # but when I called I got blown off big time.

After this rejection I sort of gave up for a week but then realized I better get moving because February is coming up soon.


I really want to do this and do it right and I appreciate all of your suggestions. Especially the one about being fun, I find that around woman I get nervous and freeze up ... possibly to be labeled as boring.

I also understand the comment about trying to hard.

I was wondering if someone can sort of take me under their wing? Like a mentor.... at least for a little while until I get back on my feet. sort of help me when I have problems and ask specific questions on what do and that sort of thing.

thanks.

 

[Brak86]

Originally posted by rswarren
I made this post as a rant/ convo starter. To point out that you can have alot going for you but still not have woman sorrounding you. ( or is it surrounding)

When I wrote out my original post I looked at it and got a confidence boost and realized ... hey ! I do have alot going for me, I should be baggin chicks.

Let me give everyone some background information.

I met this girl by luck on the internet one day by her accidentally messing up the #'s in an aol screenname

I was in a two year relationship with her ,which just ended recently. The relationship was great for the first 6 months until she became a whiny, nagging, selfish *****. I tried to brake up with her 3x but ended up coming back to her within 24 hours because I realized that I would be alone. ( AFC) This relationship was hell for me. I constantly wanted to end it but was always sucked back in by the fear of being alone. For about 1 year and a half I was actually trying to pursue other girls while in this relationship for an excuse to get out.


I finally got the spine to break up with her to enjoy my last semester in college before I leave for the army.

Now that I am alone it feels awesome. I see so many hot girls around and have tried a few approaches so far but no luck. I got a # but when I called I got blown off big time.

After this rejection I sort of gave up for a week but then realized I better get moving because February is coming up soon.


I really want to do this and do it right and I appreciate all of your suggestions. Especially the one about being fun, I find that around woman I get nervous and freeze up ... possibly to be labeled as boring.

I also understand the comment about trying to hard.

I was wondering if someone can sort of take me under their wing? Like a mentor.... at least for a little while until I get back on my feet. sort of help me when I have problems and ask specific questions on what do and that sort of thing.

thanks.

i cant be your mentor....because althouhg i am smart and can give good advice, im not a DJ by any means. But if you want a partner, i can help you out in that regard. I can give you motivation, and i wouldnt mind some more motivation myself.

 

[rswarren]

I think the above two posters hit the nail on the head.

I see the women who go for these guys and say

If thats what they want then frick them. And use that as an excuse to not approach or pursue them.


I need to get rid of this attitude and these posts are really helping.

This board is awesome.

 

[ikkenai]

Are you freakishly ugly? Are you approaching? Maybe your attitude/personality sucks ass.

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

I dont know man, Im reading your posts and you really dont seem like youve got that much of a strong personality.

You post how great you find yourself in an attempt to gain praise which shows your insecurity, you took back you ***** girlfriend three times which doesnt seem very consequent.

Like the above posters said, its a mindset, not the sum of your attributes.

Anyway, why the **** would you go to the army if you have so much going for you?

 

[rswarren]

wow phoenix... that was a comment I took personally.


I am going to the army because I feel a need to serve the country and help out with the war. Now I know the stereotype of people joining the army is the ****bags who cant do anything else, but thats not true at all.

There are people with harvard law degrees in the army. I want to join the army because I want to be a part of something bigger then myself. I want to be an army ranger because they are the one of the elite forces of the world. ( black hawk down). I want to kill terrorists. Thats why I joined the army.

Not because I have or dont have so much going for me. I could just as easily stay here, finish college, get out and work a 9-5 desk job for the rest of my life. Then be happy because I am succesful with women.

FRICK THAT. I want to jump out of planes and blow **** up !
Serve the country, be a part of something bigger.

Now phoenix SHUT THE FOOK UP

Ill defend America.


p.s I do not want to start a political arguement on here...

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

Originally posted by rswarren
wow phoenix... that was a comment I took personally.


I am going to the army because I feel a need to serve the country and help out with the war. Now I know the stereotype of people joining the army is the ****bags who cant do anything else, but thats not true at all.

There are people with harvard law degrees in the army. I want to join the army because I want to be a part of something bigger then myself. I want to be an army ranger because they are the one of the elite forces of the world. ( black hawk down). I want to kill terrorists. Thats why I joined the army.

Not because I have or dont have so much going for me. I could just as easily stay here, finish college, get out and work a 9-5 desk job for the rest of my life. Then be happy because I am succesful with women.

FRICK THAT. I want to jump out of planes and blow **** up !
Serve the country, be a part of something bigger.

Now phoenix SHUT THE FOOK UP

Ill defend America.


p.s I do not want to start a political arguement on here...

You may not know it now, but that post is a great example of whats wrong with you, "be part of something bigger", "serve the country", "kill terrorists", "blow $hit up", and to top it all off you actually think that a hollywood movie can legitimate your bullcrap.

 

[rswarren]

I came on here to get help with women. Not to be mocked on my career choices.

If you want to discuss this with me do it through pm's

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

Originally posted by rswarren
I came on here to get help with women. Not to be mocked on my career choices.

If you want to discuss this with me do it through pm's

You wanted to know whats wrong with you, I told you. Its all part of the public discussion.

 

[rswarren]

So whats wrong with me is that I want to join the military and serve the country?

Are you some like radical leftist that hates the military or something?