I think I'm starved for attention

[Desdinova]

This is royally fvcked up. Many of you know that my marriage ended. She was rarely ever home, so I stopped caring and wanting her attention. I just focused on my hobbies and interests until I was ready to end the whole thing.

Before I got married, I dated a lot of women. I was able to keep emotions out of my interactions and STRs. Never really got too attached to anyone. It was a bit sad in a sense that I became numb when it came to having feelings for women (mostly thanks to this site.) But now, things are a bit different.

I've been dating a woman for the past 3 months. I shopped around a bit, but chose to keep her. Fantastic looking woman, solid HB8, maybe 8.5. We don't have a whole hell of a lot in common, but we're both incredibly attracted to each other. She's also 4 1/2 years older than me.

I've been going berserk dealing with all this fvcking emotion I've been feeling. I honestly can't remember the last time I was this attracted to a woman. I used to be able to keep my emotions well under control, but this is like borderline insanity. I've been fighting the urges to do stupid AFC 5hit that I know would get my ass thrown to the curb. A bit of it has leaked out, but she didn't seem to mind that little bit.

I thought this place and my ex helpled destroy any emotion I could have toward women. Honestly, it feels absolutely fantastic to have some of this emotional 5hit again, but when it's pushing me to be a needy little AFC, it pisses me right off.

I think I was just starved for some female attention. The thing is, I was starved for a good five years. It's pretty tough to avoid becoming a glutton.

 

[Miles28]

You're being pretty hard on yourself. It's great that you can feel these emotions. Better than the numb, anaesthetised sensation that you say you have experienced when dating previously (and which, to be honest, I am feeling now towards every girl I'm involved with).

Enjoy the feeling of being alive. You recognise that there's a danger of lapsing into AFC behaviour which means you're bound to be more circumspect in your general approach and are consequently unlikely to f*ck this up.

 

[catman]

Im rite at this point as well? Strange haveing feelings again dont really know if i like it or not? Interesting question for sure

 

[Victory Unlimited]

What????

DESDINOVA!


Say it isn't so. Please tell us that you have NOT fallen prey to the most dangerous of enemies that MANkind has ever faced------------HUMAN EMOTION.

That is...human emotion OTHER than just "anger". There are many men (and some who have even posted HERE in recent memory) who seem to believe that the only human emotions that are allowable for men to feel towards women other than their mothers are DESIRE or ANGER.

How DARE you admit to actually finding evidence within yourself that you may actually be starting to "give a damn" about someone of the female persuasion. So, because some others of us here actually choose to give a damn about "you", I thought I'd warn you by giving you a headstart-----because they'll be coming for your ass now, son.

That's right.

In fact I hear them coming now. They're on their way right NOW.

These motherfukkers can SMELL a guy "giving off emotions" from a mile away.

So my advice to you is to start running NOW and never look back if you wanna survive.

Good Luck, soldier.


EMOTIONS are your ENEMY!!!!! :yes:

...more info.




But seriously, dude:

You're more knowledgeable NOW than you were all those years ago. Just sit back and enjoy the experience while always remembering to mix "how you feel" with "what you know"---------and the objectivity that you'll have access to will help KEEP you in proper emotional equilibrium.


PEACE...today.


VU

 

[Bluntmaster]

So you like a girl and you miss her when she's gone.

Big Deal?

Just play it cool and it will work out.

 

[cavedweller]

Des,

You are starting to fall in love with her...Nothing wrong with that.

cavedweller

 

[Falcon25]

I give it 11 days before she starts pulling away, when I read this, I thought it was written by a woman. Get your head out of your ass. You act like one of those deusche bags from the show Bachelerotte. Men don't look for love, men run into it on accident. Stop this. Very feminine. And you didn't decide to "keep" anyone. She "kept" you around. Women do the choosing. Now, if you act this feminine, she is going to choose to get rid of you.

SHE DON"T GIVE A FUVK HOW YOU FEEL OR YOUR EMOTIONS OR YOUR FEMININE LITTLE FEELINGS, ALL SHE CARES IS HOW SHE FEELS. THAT'S IT. AS SOON AS SHE LOSES THAT FEELING, YOU ARE GONE. HOW DOES SHE LOSE THAT FEELING? WHEN "YOU" FEEL WHAT "SHE" IS SUPPOSE TO FEEL. READ THIS OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

 

[CaptainJ]

You act like one of those deusche bags from the show Bachelerotte

German bags?

 

[jophil28]

Experiencing strong emotions in the presence of a woman is not the problem. Filtering out your old, habitual self defeating behavior and replacing it with productive actions is your mission.

 

[Kailex]

Desdinova, I been wondering when you would post again.

You were a perfectly well-visioned man who was sent into a dark room for years. After zero exposure to light, your eyes dulled, certain sense were suppressed and you lived getting used to that. You slowly assimilated your environment, an environment with zero illumination.

After 5 years, you were pushed back in to the open... at noon. The sun is shining bright and your "eyes" are still adjusting. They will adjust, it's just a matter of time.

This is your first "longer" relationship since the marriage.
Just keep it down, if you need to vent here, do so.

It's been 3 months... that's why. If it were 3 dates, you wouldn't have posted this. You know the AFC tendencies, so you are already leaps and bounds above the former you pre-marriage.

 

[vatoloco]

It's okay to feel emotions. The key is to keep them in check and to not act impulsively upon them (especially if they're strong emotions).

 

[jonwon]

This is royally fvcked up. Many of you know that my marriage ended. She was rarely ever home, so I stopped caring and wanting her attention. I just focused on my hobbies and interests until I was ready to end the whole thing.

Before I got married, I dated a lot of women. I was able to keep emotions out of my interactions and STRs. Never really got too attached to anyone. It was a bit sad in a sense that I became numb when it came to having feelings for women (mostly thanks to this site.) But now, things are a bit different.

I've been dating a woman for the past 3 months. I shopped around a bit, but chose to keep her. Fantastic looking woman, solid HB8, maybe 8.5. We don't have a whole hell of a lot in common, but we're both incredibly attracted to each other. She's also 4 1/2 years older than me.

I've been going berserk dealing with all this fvcking emotion I've been feeling. I honestly can't remember the last time I was this attracted to a woman. I used to be able to keep my emotions well under control, but this is like borderline insanity. I've been fighting the urges to do stupid AFC 5hit that I know would get my ass thrown to the curb. A bit of it has leaked out, but she didn't seem to mind that little bit.

I thought this place and my ex helpled destroy any emotion I could have toward women. Honestly, it feels absolutely fantastic to have some of this emotional 5hit again, but when it's pushing me to be a needy little AFC, it pisses me right off.

I think I was just starved for some female attention. The thing is, I was starved for a good five years. It's pretty tough to avoid becoming a glutton.

I believe you can recover from slip ups, its not the slip ups thats important its understanding you've slipped up, and adjust yourself accordingly.

Personnally, I slip up often in my relationship, but saying that I recover and the slip ups dont re-surface or if they do, I know how to handle the situation, like being aware of the slip up and your thoughts putting in damage limitation and being prepared for the potential fall-out of such - and when the percieved fall out happens you bomb through it because your zen aware of what you did and the resulting problems that could esculate. Once you attain the knowledge I dont think you can loose it, like for example watching a guy go out on a date with a girl with him paying for everything and watching the girls actions and knowing he's been taken for a ride - That sort of training for example is inbedded, it may be bypassed when your emotions kick in but the training is still there, i.e there is a difference in slipping up and being ignorant of the fact and slipping up and knowing you've done something silly - That to me shows your in no danger because it wouldn't be an issue if you wasn't aware of the problem, hence you probably handle it perfectly and are a little hard on yourself.

 

[5string]

Des, nothing wrong with this. You're human. I would just say not to verbalize all of it to her. You know the reasons why. If you did not have these thoughts and feelings, you would just be a bitter shell of a man. I think yer fine. Hope you don't mind my signature.

 

[game.r]

Experiencing strong emotions in the presence of a woman is not the problem. Filtering out your old, habitual self defeating behavior and replacing it with productive actions is your mission.

beautiful!

 

[romangod]

I've been going berserk dealing with all this fvcking emotion I've been feeling. I honestly can't remember the last time I was this attracted to a woman. I used to be able to keep my emotions well under control, but this is like borderline insanity. I've been fighting the urges to do stupid AFC 5hit that I know would get my ass thrown to the curb.

There's nothing wrong with having emotions for a woman. After all, you're only human. The key is being aware of those emotions and knowing what they mean.

What emotions are you exactly feeling? Are they healthy?



Emotions are good. Drowning in them is not good.


Cheers!

 

[Stagger Lee]

Uh sounds like you have oneitis. GFTOW you AFC! j/k

 

[scorpio1138]

dang the Horse$hit we have to go through to keep them around....

 

[Bluntmaster]

Maybe it's time to get married again.

 

[Desdinova]

Just to let you guys know, I dumped her. I let her know that I wanted to see more of her, and she let me know all the things that I'm going to stop doing and what she's going to make me do.

I can't comprimise the things I love for any woman no matter how hot she is. And this woman was pretty damn hot.

This **** hurts a bit, but I'll recover

 

[grinder]

I’m curious about your thoughts on dumping her. There is no “DJ” thing I can tell you that you don’t already know.