I think I understand how women feel about doormats

49au

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There's this girl I've had in my life for over 2 years now. I fvck her off and on. She lives about 3 hours away.

Anyway, I've treated this girl like absolute dog sh!t. I'm not bragging about it, I'm just telling you how it is.

I've rejected her countless times.

I had her drive down and stay with me for NYE, the whole time asking me why she isn't my gf, but letting me fvck her anyway.

I've told her I don't take her seriously.

I treat her like a sex slave.

I've told her about other women I've slept with or want to sleep with, while laying in bed with her.

I've done so much hot/cold on her that I think her mind is completely fvcked.

I'm sitting here right now texting her direct sexual comments, and despite her throwing a fit about how she has a bf now and I need to respect that - she just keeps responding.

Every time I reject her, I stay silent for a few months, then come back and start talking to her again. Each time its taken a little longer to get her guard down, but it always works.

This girl is a doormat, she satisfies some dark side of my psyche. I've loved women before and would never dream of treating those women the way I do her. Why do you think it is that I'm like this with her?

Just because she lets me.

I think all women have this dark side too. And they will unleash it on any man weak enough to let them keep trampling on him.

I keep desperately hoping one day she'll just block my number. If she did, I would finally respect her. And if I ever came at her again, I wouldn't play the game.


Just an observation.
 

Down Low

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A regular guy will, say, keep a firearm in case of attack.

A sociopath will keep a firearm in case he wants to attack.
 

CostaDeSol

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Down Low said:
A regular guy will, say, keep a firearm in case of attack.

A sociopath will keep a firearm in case he wants to attack.

Can you elaborate? I don't see how it relates to what the op is saying.
 

49au

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I think he's saying that I'm a sociopath. :)

I do have a sadistic streak. But I actually have a very wide range of emotions, which are triggered pretty powerfully by certain types of crazy girls. I also have a conscience, though there are some strange inconsistencies with it.

But my conscience would in fact forbid me to treat a normal girl like this, but this girl is clearly not normal. She just has zero self esteem, despite being hot. So I take advantage of it.

This is the same thing that most women will do to guys who allow them to. Perhaps not in a such a direct way, but they will do it.
 

MM92

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I read this through thinking it was weird. But then i realised that actually i have a girl like that. I've known her about 6 years and shag her once every year on average. Basically when i'm going through a dry spell. Just thought it sounded similar so i'd share it.
 

CostaDeSol

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49au said:
I think he's saying that I'm a sociopath. :)

I do have a sadistic streak.

I was just confused by the metaphor. I guess i wouldn't go as far as calling you a sociopath. It just sounds a bit like s&m or master/slave play to me
 

Johnnyventana

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But my conscience would in fact forbid me to treat a normal girl like this, but this girl is clearly not normal. She just has zero self esteem, despite being hot. So I take advantage of it.
This. People treat people exactly how one lets them. There's a reverse lesson in that for the dudes here. Thus, your point.
 

cablecow15

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I think subconsciously we say these things in-front of them to give them a escape route , witch normal woman would take , but these girls are so easily abused , they will just sit there and take it because they think that by being this doormat and always being there for us that we will eventually fall for them. (witch is a translation of a friendzone with women except in this scenario they get sex)

call them AFB 's if you will
 

Down Low

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A kind and loving puppy must be sadistically brutalized to become a fearful and vicious guard dog.

It's why clinical psychiatrists speak of abusers as themselves being abused. "Abused/abuser." "The abusive personality." "The abusive syndrome." "The cycle of abuse" AKA "generation after generation until total liberation." Like when a fatherless girl doesn't learn to trust men, certainly gets sexually abused by male family members, grows up to abuse her husband until he leaves, which leaves her to raise their daughter without a father.

To knowingly and willingly abuse another person: is sociopathy.

What? Do you have another definition? Is it some form of "tough love" or something? Especially when you choose as the target of your abuse a woman who seems to be disturbed/weak and easy to hurt?
 

Poonani Maker

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The girl I was with all last Summer was like that, a doormat. She saw me as a big impact in her life. I'd fvck her hard and long just wearing her out and she, it was like a righting of her that she needed, not wanted. I guess even her boyfriend at the time (she'd tell me no guy has ever fvcked long - like 2 to 3 hrs - nonstop like I'd always fvck her), who was more her age, couldn't last 10 mins, and as such, she didn't respect him, always bad-mouthed him as emotional or needy, so Sensitive, yeah, I remember her using that word the most. She still tries to contact me like every 2 months since I cut her off in September '11. At first, I didn't treat her bad, but with each successive fvck, she became boring to me (her kissing just not creative enough for me as when I first met her, no inspiration to heat things up anymore, she was just too comfortable, and had told me that I had a soothing effect on her - I guess a bad thing now that I look back on how I did her - it took away the original spark), I certainly not only began running roughshod over her kicking her back, but ultimately pushing her away for good with NC in the end.
 
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perseverance

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I'd say you have some sort of mental health issue(s) going on because the impression I got from you while reading your post is a man who doesn't mind treating this woman with such contempt and actually seems to enjoy treating her like this. She also has to have something mentally wrong with her to accept such poor treatment.
 

bigneil

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Not to defend the extreme, but 49, have you ever observed how this might arouse her?

As noted in "Neg hits" on DJ wrote how you can literally watch the reaction in their eyes.

I tried this last weekend when I finally saw a girl after 4 weeks. I sort of made fun of her and while she originally defended herself, as I held my ground I watched her pupils go medium... medium-large.... large. The next thing I knew she was hanging all over me.

Try this!
 

dutchmaster

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perseverance said:
I'd say you have some sort of mental health issue(s) going on because the impression I got from you while reading your post is a man who doesn't mind treating this woman with such contempt and actually seems to enjoy treating her like this. She also has to have something mentally wrong with her to accept such poor treatment.
So treating someone poorly now means the person has mental health issues? Interesting...
 

Trump

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Sounds like both of you have a personality disorder.

You having to put a girl down and treat her badly to sleep with her, her for accepting such harsh treatment.

It would be a different story if she was insulting you or was your gf and giving
you crap, but to do it to sleep with her or feel better about yourself shows no confidence on your part.
 
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perseverance

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dutchmaster said:
So treating someone poorly now means the person has mental health issues? Interesting...
I'd say so, yes, this kind of behaviour doesn't seem normal to me. Quite why anyone would deliberately go out to abuse someone else is beyond my level of comprehension, then again I was brought up, not dragged up.
 

coochieman

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Nothing's wrong with you.

There are only volunteers. No victims.... The problem is her's.

The girl let's you treat her like sh!t and so far it's workin.... Isn't it getting you her vag when you want it? Then, you are pulling the right cords(for sex I mean), so why stop ?

The OP must be aware that not all girls would accept such treatment.

If ever you want to do some good for her, then stop. Easy as that. With that being said, if you like her well enough, try telling her to get some help for her esteem issues.
 

Packers2010

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after reading your post i learned something.

I take women at what they say not what they do. i realized it. then read the replies forgot that. then i remembered it. then instantly forgot it again. you can tell how badly I am stuck in " AFC mode"
 

49au

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Packers, let me tell you a story about that same girl.

On NYE I took her to a party. Then we went to a club with a bunch of friends.

We went home around 1am and I could tell something was up. She'd been all over me the whole time, and now she was pissed. I asked her what was wrong and she said she didn't want to talk.

At my place she goes straight to the couch and turns on the TV. So I just go to bed, assuming she'll follow eventually. She never did. I wake up the next morning and have a bunch of texts from her on my phone. Keep in mind, she's sending me all these texts while I'm in the bedroom and she's in the living room. Crazy.

They're talking about what an ******* I am, how I'll never change, never commit, she thought I wanted her to be my gf, she's tired of me using her, and she's leaving in the morning.

So I walk into the living room with a smile on my face and say something dumb like "Looks like someone could use some love." I cuddle up to her on the couch and she tells me she's pissed and she's leaving soon.

I told her that's OK and just start massaging her neck and talking in a really low voice to her. Then I started massaging her leg, and inner thigh for a few minutes. Long story short... I kept getting her horny, then got her off and then told her it was my turn. I got on top of her and railed her. Just rough.

I flipped her over and busted on her back then told her to go clean it off.

Not only did she not leave, she stayed all day and fvcked me again.
 

ArcBound

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Trump said:
Sounds like both of you have a personality disorder.

You having to put a girl down and treat her badly to sleep with her, her for accepting such harsh treatment.

It would be a different story if she was insulting you or was your gf and giving
you crap, but to do it to sleep with her or feel better about yourself shows no confidence on your part.
It's not a personality disorder its human nature a lot of people have. People in positions of power can afford to mistreat people they have power over. You see this with politicians, policemen, bosses at the workplace. 49 just has sexual power over this girl and she's willing to put up with all this and she's willing to be a doormat (who knows why, maybe bad parents but it doesn't matter) for 49.

Second she probably gets off on some of the stuff 49 does. What you think is harsh she might think sexy and dominant.
 
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