I Think I know the problem with all of the guys here who face so much rejection

[positivity_injection]

you all learn techniques, lessons, strategies, C+F, gunwitch, and a million other things

but.........you cant **** with reality.....all these strategies will not work if the girl who is your target thinks you look ugly or creepy

people are too nice to just tell you that you are ugly, trust me, they wont do it.....i was told i looked handsome and all that BS when i was 15-17, but reality was that i was ugly, and i did not dress well, was flabby, looked weird in general, not something a girl would wanna be with

to the guys who feel that they face TOO MUCH rejection despite their efforts.....do what i did - work on your presentation of your looks......lose excess weight, get a tan, get some nice hair, dress like a stud, do a 180 in not how you look, but in how you PRESENT yourself to the female audience

and after you do this, THEN all of these techniques you are learning here will start working, because girls will actually have initial interest in getting to know who you are (because they wont think u look weird or creepy)

sorry fellas, its the truth, ive lived it!

 

[BeyondCharm]

Great advice! It's harsh and blunt but true. Focussing on your image and looks is so important to getting women.

If a person spent 80% of their time on improving look, image and reputation and 20% of their time on methods/techniques they'd be much better off getting higher quality women.

Your looks are the indicator of the quality of hotness IN MOST CASES of women you can land. That is why if you ever had a friend who had a hot girlfriend but wasn't very good looking, they were usually together from highschool or earlier because he knows if he broke up with her, that would be it for him.

Unfortunately most people do the opposite and end up shooting themselves in the foot by spending more time in techniques / lines / manipulative methods and NLP than on looks and how they could improve them.

The reason they shoot themselves in the foot

 

[ChrizZ]

you all learn techniques, lessons, strategies, C+F, gunwitch, and a million other things

but.........you cant **** with reality.....all these strategies will not work if the girl who is your target thinks you look ugly or creepy

people are too nice to just tell you that you are ugly, trust me, they wont do it.....i was told i looked handsome and all that BS when i was 15-17, but reality was that i was ugly, and i did not dress well, was flabby, looked weird in general, not something a girl would wanna be with

to the guys who feel that they face TOO MUCH rejection despite their efforts.....do what i did - work on your presentation of your looks......lose excess weight, get a tan, get some nice hair, dress like a stud, do a 180 in not how you look, but in how you PRESENT yourself to the female audience

and after you do this, THEN all of these techniques you are learning here will start working, because girls will actually have initial interest in getting to know who you are (because they wont think u look weird or creepy)

sorry fellas, its the truth, ive lived it!

Attitude and the way you perceive yourself is the most important thing.

That goes hand in hand with looks though.

The way you look is an indicator of how you feel on the inside. If you dress like a slob, have pimples etc. it shows that you don't respect yourself...so why would anybody else respect you let alone women?

However you have to have core confidence FIRST or you will end up like an insecure pu$$y that gets all his confidence from his looks and is always paranoid of how people view him.

 

[slaog]

you all learn techniques, lessons, strategies, C+F, gunwitch, and a million other things

but.........you cant **** with reality.....all these strategies will not work if the girl who is your target thinks you look ugly or creepy

people are too nice to just tell you that you are ugly, trust me, they wont do it.....i was told i looked handsome and all that BS when i was 15-17, but reality was that i was ugly, and i did not dress well, was flabby, looked weird in general, not something a girl would wanna be with

to the guys who feel that they face TOO MUCH rejection despite their efforts.....do what i did - work on your presentation of your looks......lose excess weight, get a tan, get some nice hair, dress like a stud, do a 180 in not how you look, but in how you PRESENT yourself to the female audience

and after you do this, THEN all of these techniques you are learning here will start working, because girls will actually have initial interest in getting to know who you are (because they wont think u look weird or creepy)

sorry fellas, its the truth, ive lived it!

Thats what you believe and so it's become your reality.

 

[JackRyanJuan]

I think you need to qualify your statements positivy injection. Are you talking about ONS'? LTR? FB's? I think your claim about presentation becomes less applicable the longer you are dating a girl. Initially, sure, that's what gets you ONS and FB's, but I think personality and confidence in yourself and your ability to lead a relationship become more important down the road.

 

[positivity_injection]

the issue is, as i have seen too many times, is that nerdy guys get told that LOOKS DONT MATTER LOOKS DONT MATTER, and then those same nerdy guys wonder why they face rejection so much when they try to run game on an HB8 at a club or street or mall.........the FACT that i have learned is, when you look good, you feel good, and as a man, most of your look can be worked on easily

so tomorrow, to all you guys who are outta shape, instead of reading techniques on inner game, go lift some weights and do an hour of cardio, and change yourself for the better, FOR REAL

 

[positivity_injection]

I think you need to qualify your statements positivy injection. Are you talking about ONS'? LTR? FB's? I think your claim about presentation becomes less applicable the longer you are dating a girl. Initially, sure, that's what gets you ONS and FB's, but I think personality and confidence in yourself and your ability to lead a relationship become more important down the road.

good point friend

initially the better you present yourself, the better

but once u have ****ed a girl and shown her that you can give her sexual pleasure, your presentation of your looks to her will matter less, given that you continue to give her that pleasure

 

[ezily]

you all learn techniques, lessons, strategies, C+F, gunwitch, and a million other things

but.........you cant **** with reality.....all these strategies will not work if the girl who is your target thinks you look ugly or creepy

people are too nice to just tell you that you are ugly, trust me, they wont do it.....i was told i looked handsome and all that BS when i was 15-17, but reality was that i was ugly, and i did not dress well, was flabby, looked weird in general, not something a girl would wanna be with

to the guys who feel that they face TOO MUCH rejection despite their efforts.....do what i did - work on your presentation of your looks......lose excess weight, get a tan, get some nice hair, dress like a stud, do a 180 in not how you look, but in how you PRESENT yourself to the female audience

and after you do this, THEN all of these techniques you are learning here will start working, because girls will actually have initial interest in getting to know who you are (because they wont think u look weird or creepy)

sorry fellas, its the truth, ive lived it!

really good advice. I agree with it completely.

But where are you coming from? You join not long ago and then all of the sudden I start seeing tons of posts giving advice from you. Not being mean or anything but usually the best and most reliable advice comes from guys who've been here/around for a while. I'm just curious as to what your backstory is and how you came across this stuff.

 

[ItsOnNow]

What if you're fat/average looking,have a good personality,don't come off as creepy,maybe a bit shy perhaps? What chicks do you have a chance with then? I often think that I don't want to sleep with everything that moves,then I feel like I do. It's conflicting.

 

[Wodan]

the issue is, as i have seen too many times, is that nerdy guys get told that LOOKS DONT MATTER LOOKS DONT MATTER, and then those same nerdy guys wonder why they face rejection so much when they try to run game on an HB8 at a club or street or mall.........the FACT that i have learned is, when you look good, you feel good, and as a man, most of your look can be worked on easily

so tomorrow, to all you guys who are outta shape, instead of reading techniques on inner game, go lift some weights and do an hour of cardio, and change yourself for the better, FOR REAL

So true! I have a friend i went to high school with and now 3 years on from being at different uni's he is getting no women, and im getting a fair few.

He preaches that looks arent everything and says in quite a cursing way that guys that get girls based on theyre looks cant keep them. And also has defenately read alot of game, approaches loads of people and yet is single and has had sex only once in his life.

I put on 4 stone of muscle in 5 months and thats been the biggest aid to my game really, that alongside getting rid of long hair and dressing properly. ( I suddenly got alot of attention but couldnt make anything of it at first due to a negative outlook due to lack of game or vice versa)

At the end of the day a fat girl that seemed like the nicest person in the world. would you date her? I know i wouldnt

Girls defenately take looks into account so dont think you can be lazy, put next to no effort into your appearance and get a girl that spends hours everyday on looking good.

 

[Wodan]

What if you're fat/average looking,have a good personality,don't come off as creepy,maybe a bit shy perhaps? What chicks do you have a chance with then? I often think that I don't want to sleep with everything that moves,then I feel like I do. It's conflicting.

I think creepy is just a form of wierd. And wierd is something you dont understand.

If your shy people wont understand you and label you as wierd or creepy if you prefer that word.

I used to be incredibly shy, spent too much of my youth playing computer games and the lack of social practice made me shy. Ive turned it around now but its an ongoing thing, I frequently push myself out of my comfort zone so i become increasingly less shy (being fluent in cold approaches will be one thing i must achieve before i consider myself to not be shy anymore)

Anyway a fair few of my friends i met early on in university, before i got rid of alot of my shyness interpreted me as wierd at first because of it, and if theyd acted on theyre early judgements then id be minus a few friends.

Just trying to help you see things from another angle, I think shy people tend to be so because they are really careing people. Think how much you will care about wishing you didnt act shy you will feel on your death bed though?

You will really wish you had lived life to experience as much as you can, and being shy goes directly against that. I hope you will force your comfort zone more if you havent already so that shyness becomes a thing of the past for you

Also i want to put across that being shy you will tend to get the worst girls because only a slag will tend to do the approach for you and make all the first moves especially up2 sex.

I think if you change two things, Shyness to extrovertedness and from being fat/average to athletic you can have pretty much any woman you want.

 

[Effington]

As someone else mentioned, self-esteem and your presentation go hand in hand. People who have high self-esteem typically like the way they look and take pride in their appearance.

Days where I'm reserved and ticked at the world, I will get nasty looks from 5's, but days where I'm on my game I will get numbers from 9's and 10's. All the posts here about how looks are the only thing that matters are just excuses from people with no success.

 

[Wodan]

As someone else mentioned, self-esteem and your presentation go hand in hand. People who have high self-esteem typically like the way they look and take pride in their appearance.

Days where I'm reserved and ticked at the world, I will get nasty looks from 5's, but days where I'm on my game I will get numbers from 9's and 10's. All the posts here about how looks are the only thing that matters are just excuses from people with no success.

Were saying looks matter, not that theyre the only thing that counts.

 

[SinJester]

If you go out and get rejected a lot at the start it's because you aren't natural with it yet. These are just all techniques you haven't tried and aren't sure about. You don't know if they work and don't have experience with them, and it's not something you naturally do so it might be awkward. You will most likely be in your head thinking everything through and you won’t be in the moment. That's why you come across as creepy, not because of your looks (unless you look really bad and don't know basic hygiene, but I'm assuming very few people here come under that category).

If you keep doing it then it will become naturally and it will be part of you. It won’t seem creepy anymore and you success will go up massively. You will have more experience, more confidence and will be able to just be it the moment. Things will happen through you instead of you having to think about them, even if they were originally 'techniques'.

Who here originally tried c/f and it didn't work? Who now does it naturally without thinking and it works a treat? I know that's what happened to me.

So you shouldn't be surprised if things don't work at first. It isn't that they don't work, you just aren't good at them yet. It's the same with every other skill you learn. I'm sure I don't have to use the learning to drive a car metaphor here. You see when you are in your head girls will pick this up and sense that you aren't authentic, that you aren't clear about your intentions and therefore creepy. However unfortunately it is a necessary stage you have to go through with everything if you want to get good at something or integrate a new characteristic.

That's it. You guys are giving credit to looks where it isn't due. Sure I agree looks play some part in everything but a good looking guy can still come across as creepy. It is how you PRESENT yourself to women, but not through clothes and style. It is you actions, energy, body language, vocal tone, sub-communications. You present yourself to women by being present. Of course they don't know it consciously and can't express it in words, they just get a feeling and say to their girlfriends "he's creepy, there's just something about him".

Think of a nerdy guy that you all speak of. Is he dressed bad? Maybe. Is it the only thing that makes him creepy? If he is perceived as nerdy than he obviously has bad social skills, so how can you put it down to looks? He would be awkward, nervous, shy, and in his head. Certainly a big difference from being self-assured, calm, well-spoken, smooth and extroverted. And you want to put it all down to looks? Sorry fellas but I don't agree.

And honestly how many people here go out trying ‘game’ without dressing decently and having a shower? Seems pretty basic to me, I’ve been doing that all my life before I even came close to finding this place. Now I’m sure some people need help there and they definitely should fix that up but I don’t think that would be the majority. Even if you are a slob and fix that up, well that it really great, but it isn't the total solution.

Anyone agree think the same way? I agree with ChrizZ and slaog on this one.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Looks do not matter. But, yes; Improving your looks/presentation helps as you mentioned above.

 

[edger]

Looks DO NOT matter. That I'm certain of. For those of you following my post's at the Mature Man's Forum, I've talked about this a lot. Most HOT women I see are with average to below average looking guys, as well as slobs and dorks. And when I actually see a good-looking guy with a hot woman, it's really a breath of fresh air.

But it's actually a good thing that looks don't matter to women. And I say that because, everyone deserves a shot with a hot woman regardlesss of whether they're ugly or not. It's only fair. Ugly guys can't help it that they're ugly, so I'm glad to see they still have a shot with hot women, through good game. As long as you are smooth and have good game with the ladies, you will do fine. And a lot of unattractive guys happen to have good game, which is why so many of them get hot women.

I'm without a doubt a good-looking guy, yet it is rare that I pull hot women(meaning I get to f*ck 'em). Most of the time, I get ZERO vibes from hot women.

 

[AlekNovy]

I agree that a lot of guys in this thing are getting it wrong and wondering why they're experiencing a ton of rejection, I disagree with the given reason though.

The reason is something else...

Something completely overlooked...

Yet fairly ****ing common sense.

It's called "cold approaching".

Why is this so damn important?

What I've noticed is that the community tends to create this special breed of guys (hey I was one of them for the longest part of my journey)... Who are unique in that, they've got less love/sex experience than an average guy, yet a ton more advanced experience, which is a paradox in itself, but true.

It's basically like this. Cold approaching (or pick up) is the highest level of social/sexual skill possible. Yet this is what most guys concentrate on.

We actually have like virgins, who go around and try to approach the hottest girl in the club, and pull her home that same night.

Which isn't bad in and of itself, but I'm just saying it's probably the hardest route to take. You're going to experience a TON of rejection before you even get semi-good.

Now, these same guys... if they tried to get dates and ask girls out within their social circle? Guess what, they would experience almost NO rejection. I mean like almost zero rejection.

And yes, I mean as they currently are. Without revamping their image or whatever.

I think the healthiest balance would be like a combination of both for beginners. Like concentrating on the social circle, but doing a bit of cold approaching on the side simply as an excercise so that it grows in paralel.

 

[SinJester]

Great post AlekNovy, so true. Normal people get laid and get girlfriends all the time, yet how many of them do cold approaches? Lots of PUAs can be well reguarded even before they can get laid once in awhile. I agree with your advice about doing both. The thing is with social cicle game don't try and change who you are and start pulling out all these new techniques because the last thing you need to do is weird out your social circle.

It is important to both if you want to have some success and improve your social skills. You aren't going to get a lot more advanced or increase your social skills if you stay in your own circle. Still I wouldn't say you can experiance almost no rejection, unless you know the girl is attracted to you.

The most import part is: "And yes, I mean as they currently are. Without revamping their image or whatever"

That kind of thought is extremely rare in community guys and actually damaging if you don't believe that.

 

[AlekNovy]

Great post AlekNovy, so true. Normal people get laid and get girlfriends all the time, yet how many of them do cold approaches? Lots of PUAs can be well reguarded even before they can get laid once in awhile. I agree with your advice about doing both. The thing is with social cicle game don't try and change who you are and start pulling out all these new techniques because the last thing you need to do is weird out your social circle.

It is important to both if you want to have some success and improve your social skills. You aren't going to get a lot more advanced or increase your social skills if you stay in your own circle. Still I wouldn't say you can experiance almost no rejection, unless you know the girl is attracted to you.

The most import part is: "And yes, I mean as they currently are. Without revamping their image or whatever"

That kind of thought is extremely rare in community guys and actually damaging if you don't believe that.

Yeah man, good point. That's probably one of the biggest weaknesses of "personal development". It can go TOO FAR. Up to a point where people take too much responsibility and are almost made to feel bad for not living up to a perfect standard.

Growing, evolving and improving yourself is good.

But accepting yourself *AS YOU ARE* currently is so much more key. First accept, then improve and add.