"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I saw my one-itis from college, and she...

MVP

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did not look that good at all.

I learned very quickly why one-itis is stupid.
 
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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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MVP, how do I get rid of my oneitis...All I do is think about this girl 24/7 always trying to talk to her, but I make sure she approaches me and starts off the convo so I don't seem as needy. Although she prolly wnats to be friends, we still flirt back and forth, which seems to give me hope one day we will have a relationship. I mean I don't mind thinking of her once in a while, but this is too much. And I guarantee you this, I bet no other guy is doing the same as me, nor she is thinking of me like this...

How did you get rid of yours or what should I do to maybe make her change her ways?
 

edmond

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Chicks Just Dig Me said:
MVP, how do I get rid of my oneitis...All I do is think about this girl 24/7 always trying to talk to her, but I make sure she approaches me and starts off the convo so I don't seem as needy. Although she prolly wnats to be friends, we still flirt back and forth, which seems to give me hope one day we will have a relationship. I mean I don't mind thinking of her once in a while, but this is too much. And I guarantee you this, I bet no other guy is doing the same as me, nor she is thinking of me like this...

How did you get rid of yours or what should I do to maybe make her change her ways?
Everyone has been there.
What do you do in your free time?
Keep yourself busy, go to the gym to improve your mind and body.
Do something for yourself and stop thinking about her, as she does not give a fvck about you.
 

MVP

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First you have to believe in yourself that you don't need someone else for validation. You do this by focusing on your goals in life. Second, when you have free time go out and socialize and meet new girls. It's a lot easier and fun to do that, then to spend your time with the same people (your oneitis). You will realize how many girls are actually out there.
If you say she is flirting with you, and you want it, then just raise it to the next level. Take charge of it more. If you feel like she's not interested in you that much, maybe it's because you're not escalating it. I would one day dress up real nice, and then when she talks to you, look at her in a very ****y / confident way. 90% of communication is about how your body language and expression/eye contact are. Then why don't you ask her out, or ask her to come over to your place to look at some of your hobbies or movies or whatever.
I don't know what she thinks, maybe she'll like you or maybe she won't, but that's the chance you'll have to take if you want to take it to the next step with her. Don't base your life around this chick, or else you will seeth with desperation. The key is to make her feel comfortable with you, bonus if you can make her laugh, and then just take charge. This doesn't just apply to this particular girl, whether she likes you or not, you can do this to every girl you meet.
 
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Well I was a little nice to her in the past. I can make her laugh very easily and I am very comfortable with her. I think she caught onto my "hitting upon her" and stated she did have a boyfriends, which was untrue. We are very good friends right now, but we still don't hang out outside of school, which I don't like. She likes to hang around with me, but it feels like its just a school thing with her. After a dance, she was going out with a couple of her female friends, and a few of her gay friends, but did not ask me if I wanted to go. Her not asking me if I want to go out to eat with her means she does not like me at all...
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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DJsomeday

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read "the power of detachment" in weapons of mass seduction that chapter RULES and it can change the way you look things :D! just search it with the search engine :)
 

Incog

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Chicks Just Dig Me said:
Well I was a little nice to her in the past. I can make her laugh very easily and I am very comfortable with her. I think she caught onto my "hitting upon her" and stated she did have a boyfriends, which was untrue. We are very good friends right now, but we still don't hang out outside of school, which I don't like. She likes to hang around with me, but it feels like its just a school thing with her. After a dance, she was going out with a couple of her female friends, and a few of her gay friends, but did not ask me if I wanted to go. Her not asking me if I want to go out to eat with her means she does not like me at all...
Looks like a limited IL. Hang out with her outside school, isolate, when flirting reaches its peak, kiss close.

If it doesn't work, that should tell you that you need to move on.
 

Kev07

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1. i forced myself to cut contact.
2. whenever i think of the person, i quickly add in "fvck that *****"
3. think of what you do for her, and what she does for you(which probably won't be a lot)
4. talk to other women
5. stay busy
6. "fvck that *****" <-- i used this thought constantly when i decided i did not want oneitis anymore.

worked for me.


you can take this a step further (i did this) by asking her out (if you're not together) and know that you will get rejected. then you have another reason to think "fvck that *****!"
 

Holland

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I agree. I wasted 4 months in one-itis about a year ago.
If I think back to her now: I'm like: WTF, dude.

I guess standards for women rise as you rise up the ranks of manhood yourself.
 

nicenomore

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Go talk to 3-4 other girls whom you have a slight interest level in or whom you flirt lightly with. I get a different one-itis everyday cuz of it. :)
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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