"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I need your guys' help, I cannot, no matter how hard I try, forget about her

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Brighty

Master Don Juan
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Me and this one girl have had this thing on and off (but never dated, only flirted) for three years now in high school. The first year was freshman year and I was a shy little bytch and I didnt make a move (well I did but I botched it up). She ran through my mind constantly and it continued into sophmore year where she ended up dating another guy and I got pissed off because I thought she liked me. I ended up disgusted with her (still a shy kid) and I basically ignored her all throughout junior year. As I sit in the shower waiting for a different girl to come over (parents are out of town), my thoughts return to that same girl once again. I just keep on wondering what-if. In the past (especially junior year) she's clearly made come on attempts to me while she's had a new boyfriend but I've ignored them. I made the realization that she did still like me, just that I've been too much of a shy ***** to do anything about it.

After all of this time I'm still hung up on her, I've tried to replace her with other girls but god damn it she still comes up in my mind almost daily.

I'm questioning whether to call off the girl coming over tonight and just spend the night alone after this epiphany... I feel heart-sick and I know I'm stupid because I'm so young and have no idea what love is, but god damn it, I don't know why I'm so hung up on her.

Can anyone with some experience help me out?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Warrior74

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enjoy that new girl. focus on her and who she is. stay in the present. time will sort you out man. Keep your head up.
 
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Jokerlsk

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Focus on the faults of the first girl. Trust me it's the only way to go. I've had oneitis twice and that's how i got over both of them. When you think of that girl don't think about how great she is but everything that's wrong w/ her. Don't call off the thing w. this girl. enjoy her company and focus on the good in her. Don't let one girl restrict you from enjoying life man.
 
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SmoothTalker

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No need to call off things with the new girl. I mean don't claim to love her and only her forever or anything like that, but you shouldn't be doing that anyway, just have fun.

If the girl you can't forget does in fact like you back though, I'd give it a shot.

One of 3 things will happen:
1)You'll date her allowing you to get to know her better, and stop liking her because you find her behaviour annoying, etc.

2)You date her and she's everything you imagine, in which case you'll probably go AFC (no offense, but it happens at your age if you are REALLY into the girl), and she'll get sick of you and dump you. You will probably find it easier to get over her then because you know it won't work.

3) You date and are both happy. In that case, sure you'll miss out on some experiences while you're in an LTR, but its not as horriblie as some people on this site claim. I did it, and do not regret it at all, because you also gain a ton of experiences. And lets be honest, high school girls are not college girls - yeah you might be able to have some action without relationships, but you'll have far less sex. Hell half the girls in high school are reluctant to have sex WITH THEIR BOYFRIENDS because they don't want to be considered sluts (makes no sense to me.. but whatever, you can get around this), are they really going to put out for casual sex?

Its also nice to develop a connection with someone, just don't become whipped and you'll be fine.

PS: It is a bit odd that you can't get over her even when you are getting other girls. My classic AFC Oneitis case was on this one girl from grade 8 to half way through grade 10. She was cute but nothing too special, and she had zero interest in me but for some reason I couldn't get over her. Then I started dating a new girl and like a switch the oneitis was gone. Well.. the oneitis also put on some weight, that probably helped lol.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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DonJuan11

Master Don Juan
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I don't get why you are upset. She tried to come on to you when you liked her, you rejected her. Now that she's moved on, you are digusted with her for not trying to make a move again?

You are hung up on her because your ego thought she come back to you again and again. Now that she hasn't and moved on with her bf, you ego has taken a serious beating. Don't punish the current girl because of it.
 
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MikeEdward1973

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HandyAndy said:
Imagine her taking a massiv dump, works half the time, everytime ;)
Click to expand...
that was funny
 
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