I need some REAL advice

[Brians_600rr]

alrighty, me and my girl broke up after a 7 month relationship about 2 weeks ago because im getting shipped out to korea and i really dont want to do the long distance thing..

of course i told her it wasn't the distance and that i really wasnt into the relationship anymore (which i wasnt) but shes such a nice girl and she did and would do anything for me..

so onto the questions.. she really wants me back BAD! i mean i would def say yes if i was stationed near her but right now its not looking like ima be anywhere around her for about another year...

well anyways me and her still chat cause i wanted to keep her as a friend and of course shes always asking 'can i be yours' and 'will u be mine' every 30 seconds..

but my question is should i really be talking to her on the phone anymore.. i mean i have limited to contact to a friend level but still she wants to chat on the phone forever every night.. right now im in texas and shes in arizona so we cant really meet up.. so phone talks and texting is the only way to chat.. i mean i like talking to her on the phone but is it really the smart thing to do.. right now i really just want her to be happy.. she deserves it.. and she tells me the only thing that will make her happy again is if we get back together.. and that is def not happenin..

so please any advice on this situation would be awesome..

 

[KontrollerX]

I'm assuming you are in the military on the limited amount of information you have given so I'll just say this...

You need to focus all of your attention, energy and emotions on that.

Worrying about some chick whose got oneitis for you until of course she meets some stud in her area to rock her panties off is counter productive because you and I both know thats going to happen and her texts and phone calls will become less frequent and distant sounding after that happens and she is fvcked three ways from Sunday but oh of course don't worry about that now she'll say as we all know she'll be more than happy to play you and get her emotional fix from your continued attention until that new guy appears in her life which again will inevitably happen.

So yeah you don't have to be an assh0le to her but you have to be a fvcking man and grow a backbone and tell her that you and she cannot talk in any fashion be it texts or phone calls or whatever the fvck and that for now its best she move on.

You can add that its a decision of circumstance and that if you end up in her area again in the future and she's single you both can go from there if you have feelings for eachother then but right now its just not feasible to try and maintain a relationship over such a distance.

Word all this however you feel is best but absolutely go no contact until you get back in her area and you decide if you want to get back together with her again.

Its that simple.

Be a man and go cold no contact after you give her this message.

Do not let her whine, emotionally blackmail you or do any other manipulative bullsh!t to get you to keep talking with her.

Your word as a man is final in this and she's just going to have to accept it.

Make that clear to her and hold to it yourself and stay strong in your resolve to do so.

Do not I repeat do not allow your emotions to be played upon to continue a discourse with her.

If she calls and you hear her voice hang up the phone.

If she texts you block her or don't answer.

Got it?

 

[Brians_600rr]

damn thats some tough advice.. but i guess its true.. i really do have to cut contact completely

but check this out.. in two months i get to go home for awhile.. almost a full 2 months... she noes this and shes already talking about it... i noe shes gonna wanna hang out all the time and im cool with that because wen we are together and not separated by a couple states we have a blast. should i do this?

like i said before though, there will def be no chance of us getting together before i leave for korea...

again, any advice would be greatly appreciated

 

[Metaphysical]

it is better if you distance yourself away, but if you want to be friends with her, then go ahead and do that.

this is your life. who should be telling you how to live it or how to act? YOU.

find out if you really like her and value her as a friend. if u do, keep her, if not then move on.

 

[KontrollerX]

Heh heh see now you've gone and added extra information that changes things entirely.

Well at least partially.

All the advice I gave you stands for when you are going to be seperated from her for a year.

For right now though since you'll get to see her again in two months talk to her now and again and keep it mostly to phone calls as you can tell where her emotions are at when you hear her voice and keep her laughing and giggling and happy with you basically.

Then once you're back with her fvck the sh!t out of her as much as you can and try and make it your best performances ever each time.

Really make her remember it.

Then my previous advice comes back into play.

And that means when you leave for a year and you are sure thats how long it will be give her the message about it being best for you both to move on for the time being and if there is any feelings left for eachother when you get back then you'll both go from there and that if she meets someone else while you are away that is cool.

Then you go cold no contact and do as I said.

Having fvcked her so good then having stood your ground as a man to her and not given in to texts and phone calls you'll be on her mind for a very long time.

If you b!tch out though and let her talk with you in any capacity after saying its best you and she move on until you get back she will definitely use those talks to get over you emotionally while all the while you'll view it as her being interested in you.

Then when new guy comes along all that I said will happen.

And look it may happen anyway but the point is you'll be on her mind much longer and in a stronger way if again you fvck her really good and then tell her the its over message and then stick to your guns on it with the no contact.