"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

I need some cute stories.

JDA70

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Try and get her emotions going.
Ask her to close her eyes and think of her favorite color
then ask " how does that color make you feel"

Or " when you get up in the morning
what gets you motivated for the day?"

Or "What excites you about life that keeps you going?"
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Ace of Flames

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Incog said:
You're on this forum looking for funny stories to tell a chick so you can pass them off as your own. What are you in it for?
Ace of Flames said:
Thanks for actually responding Shinra. I'm not looking for stories that actually happened to someone, to pass them off as my own, though. I was thinking more like, just some fictional, quirky little story. I dunno, it could be about a cat and a ball of string. Think like, bedtime stories, kinda.
Reading Comprehension.

Use it.
 

Mayfly

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You want a cute story...here's one...

One day I was walking down the street and this puppy came running down the street in front of me. It had the cutest little face, and it didn't have a collar on. So I took it in, and cared for it as the years wore on. It now was about 4 years old and it was this year when the owner final came by. I was really depressed to give it away, but the owner seemed genuine and wanted to take care of it. The weirdest thing was that he was wearing an Atlanta Falcons jersey with the #7 on the back. When I asked his name, he said his name was Michael. I said he seems nice enough and gave him the dog. I wonder what ever happened to Bruno.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Ace of Flames

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Lol, better nate than lever. That's retarded. I'm glad I read the comments first.

And yeah, that's way too long. I was thinking something I could tell in a few minutes. I don't wanna be preaching here, lol.
 

ChocolateVanilla

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Mayfly said:
You want a cute story...here's one...

One day I was walking down the street and this puppy came running down the street in front of me. It had the cutest little face, and it didn't have a collar on. So I took it in, and cared for it as the years wore on. It now was about 4 years old and it was this year when the owner final came by. I was really depressed to give it away, but the owner seemed genuine and wanted to take care of it. The weirdest thing was that he was wearing an Atlanta Falcons jersey with the #7 on the back. When I asked his name, he said his name was Michael. I said he seems nice enough and gave him the dog. I wonder what ever happened to Bruno.
Have you seriously told that story to a girl?


LOL, man this thread is one of the funniest ones I've read in a while.
 

comic_relief

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Ace of Flames said:
I'm looking for fairly short, cute little stories that would make a girl smile.
This one night, I fvcked your mom.

alright, in all seriousness, I told my girlfriend the story "acre of diamonds" and she loved it.

Also stories about my past worked really well, can't really give any good stories on the fly, but just use your humor and past for the stories.

Also read inspirational material like Chicken Soup for the Soul. They have good stories.

comic_relief
 

DJ Wrangler

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Mayfly said:
You want a cute story...here's one...

One day I was walking down the street and this puppy came running down the street in front of me. It had the cutest little face, and it didn't have a collar on. So I took it in, and cared for it as the years wore on. It now was about 4 years old and it was this year when the owner final came by. I was really depressed to give it away, but the owner seemed genuine and wanted to take care of it. The weirdest thing was that he was wearing an Atlanta Falcons jersey with the #7 on the back. When I asked his name, he said his name was Michael. I said he seems nice enough and gave him the dog. I wonder what ever happened to Bruno.
HOLY SH!T ! that one was hilarious! this is by far the funniest thread I have read...
 

Incog

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Ace of Flames said:
Reading Comprehension.

Use it.
So you're looking for short, fictional, cute stories that'll make a chick smile after sex.

Seriously, you already got her in the sack, your intuition should take over from there. What to say, if anything, comes naturally.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Ace of Flames

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Incog said:
So you're looking for short, fictional, cute stories that'll make a chick smile after sex.

Seriously, you already got her in the sack, your intuition should take over from there. What to say, if anything, comes naturally.
It doesn't have to be after sex. That was just an example.

Also, its not like I can't make up something. Its just that what I make up isn't always that good, lol. It would work much smoother if I had an actual story in reserve.

Are you trying to tell me all of you guys are master poets ALL the time or something? Everyone is a Lit major? Seems like a mighty coincidence. :crazy:
 

ValleyDJing

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Ace Ace Ace...*throws arm over your shoulder* I'm gonna make a player out of you if its the last thing I do!!
 

Incog

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Ace of Flames said:
It doesn't have to be after sex. That was just an example.

Also, its not like I can't make up something. Its just that what I make up isn't always that good, lol. It would work much smoother if I had an actual story in reserve.

Are you trying to tell me all of you guys are master poets ALL the time or something? Everyone is a Lit major? Seems like a mighty coincidence. :crazy:
I like to pull random Shakespeare quotes and cite them.

ME: Cowards die many times before their deaths
CHICK: What!?!

ME: Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow creeps in this petty pace from day to day, to the last syllable of recorded time
CHICK: !?!?
 

The Sperminator

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Heres a story you can tell her. It's from one of the other users on this site.

I live in this apartment with blinds that don't close completely 100% but sometimes leave very tiny slits. (I still don't know if they were actually able to see me through the slits.) Btw, I never bothered to get new blinds or buy a curtain over it.

So I put in some porn and started to indulge in it.. several minutes into it, I hear a voice from the window calling my name. I recognized it - it was a girl that I had suspected had a crush on me for a long time although I never really bothered to make a move on her in favor of other better looking girls. There was no giggling accompanying the voice and it sounded neutral but slightly upbeat. I panicked, then got dressed and went outside 5 minutes later.. no sign of anyone.
 

jaysname

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Cute story? how about passionate love.

Ace I know what kind of story you're looking for, and I see why you're searching. There are lots of cute little anecdotes and fluffy little tales about animals, love stories or current events. Your search continues because this is not one of them. Rather this is about passionate love and will definitely get a reaction out of her :D

Tell her about the twins in Europe that were separated at birth and married. They had no idea they were twins or each other existed, so later in life when they met they felt an inevitable attraction. Of course, when they found out they had the marriage annulled.

Me what would I do? I know the right thing to do is divorce, but man, talk about strong love! You'd have a love so passionate and strong, totally unmatchable by any girl after her...I'd stay married and not tell anybody haha F everybody who says soulmates don't exist..try marrying your twin! as far as babies go, adopt. Or have a kid and just name him Donny.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

xdreamz

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use childhood experiences those are good to use

if you want a short one
just be like..

one time, i was falling asleep and hitting my head and the next day
i woke up still hitting my head.
 

iqqi

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This thread kind of creeps me out.

I guess I just don't really understand the question, but the more I think I do, the more creepy it seems.

It sounds like you are going for intimacy.

To create true intimacy, you shouldn't rely on "stock stories". You should just talk naturally. Is the problem that you don't know how to do that? It usually comes with really wanting to know more about someone, and genuinely wanting them to know you.
 

War Against Betaism

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My stories are usually just told on the spot that usually relate to what we are talking about. Oddly enough judging from responses by other people, I lived a pretty awkward life (not myself, but I've had a lot of awkward experiences and situations involve me).

This is a story I usually only tell guys, but it might work with girls...true story btw (I'm writing this as if I were talking to them):

"Okay my friend hooks up with this one girl, and they got along pretty well. At first it seemed like they were on and off, like one day they would love each other, the next day they seemed like just friends. Well they finally got together in bed one day, and she started sucking his ****. Though like a minute into it she suddenly bites the head really hard and it starts bleeding!--" At this point they're usually laughing or cracking up, but here's the best part. "If this happened to you you would say something like 'wtf?' or 'you fvckin b!tch!' Well, my friend instead said 'you betrayed me!!!!" The people who I tell this story to are usually dying of laughter at this point.

My cousin actually told me this story (I knew the guy though), and he has a history of spicing things up to real life stories, so I doubt the guy said "You betrayed me!" However it did get me rolling on the floor.

Story telling is actually an art itself. If it was easy, we all could become screenwriters and writers. I'm pretty sure if I told you guys this story face to face it would be a lot funnier.
 
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