I need some advice,I worry I may be losing touch with reality...

[ItsOnNow]

Not to sound scary,but it has got me thinking. I knoiw my posts haven't been the most positive,but it helps.

My life for the past year or so feels as if it has been pretty stagnant. I wake up,go to work,come home,and that's that,or spend too much time on the computer. On day's off,I do what I can to keep myself from going nuts. That,coupled with a constant sense of emptiness,isolation,and loneliness. This has been happening for a long time,and it feels as if everything is constantly routine,there is no escape from it. Like I have no control. Also,whenever I wake up,the bad thoughts always start,and my mind is always bogged down with mental clout of all sorts.

Alot of it I feel is social/personality related. For I always feel like I am not the person I want to be. Yet I look at everyone else and all they seem to be. Happy,confident,successful,attractive. Yet I lack these things that I want. Women,freinds,etc. I really feel like I don't know what my role is. I feel like I don't belong etc. I'll type in more,cause I cannot think straight as of now.

 

[iqqi]

You need a new activity.

Sport, working out, hobby, GOAL.

Something to take your mind off of negative thoughts, get you out of your current rut, and at the same time improve yourSELF.

So pick something.

Here is a list to start you off, pick one, or just get the jist of what I am suggesting:

1. Workout at gym (set schedule and goals)
2. Take a dance class (this will also make you sexier )
3. Take an art/photography/cooking class
4. Start jogging
5. Join a local soccar/basketball/canoeing team
6. Start going to the bar on Fridays ALONE. (I personally think being able to go out alone significantly helps you grow as a person)
7. Volunteer somewhere.

By the time you have gotten into this new activity, when you look around you will see you have a better attitude, maybe a new talent or attractive quality, and perhaps a new person or two in your life.

To get out of a rut, you must actively climb. Good luck.

 

[wolf116]

fvck off troll.

You have been given heaps of great advice, you ignore it, then start another depressing thread.

You're depressed about your mundane life but haven't taken one step to fix it.

 

[ItsOnNow]

I don't mean to be a troll. That's part of my problem,I can't always take or follow advice,or it takes me a little longer than normal too at times. I have a learning disability.

 

[wolf116]

I also have a learning disability, but I know how to get a gym membership!

 

[iqqi]

The only person who looks like a troll on this thread is the one not offering anything constructive to it.

 

[wolf116]

The only person who looks like a troll on this thread is the one not offering anything constructive to it.

I have given him heaps of constructive advise on his other threads.

I am making him think.

 

[iqqi]

Maybe he didn't find it useful.

As long as he seems to WANT to improve, and isn't claiming the world is over for everyone like him, or signing off completely, due to something trivial like height, then lets either help him, or ignore him when we get tired of him.

Yes, I was directly comparing him to Wutang.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Step one...STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHER PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO HAVE WHAT YOU WANT. As long as you do that youll be depressed.

 

[wolf116]

He has been given advice from all the top guys on this site and he couldn't find anything useful?

He hasn't done anything, how will he know what is useful advice?


Why are you asking for advice if you are not going to try anything?

What is the point?

 

[collalife]

Step one...STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHER PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO HAVE WHAT YOU WANT. As long as you do that youll be depressed.

yeah comparing is negative attitude. FOCUS ON YOUR SELF IMPROVEMENT. dont worry about others lives, strictly improve your own and live a happy one filled with positive. AS you think you shall become. think positive in every situation, assess the negative, but look for solutions.

also like the dj bible says, GET A LIFE. go out there and meet people,set wingman meetings, talk have fun and live in the moment. live your life like your happy, confident, attractive, and make progress to sucess and believe me once your mind focuses on it your mind will make it happen.

(PSYCHOLOGICAL INFO)

 

[iqqi]

Definately don't compare yourself to others.

You never know what is lurking and dark beneath the bright shiny surface of another person's grand facade.

 

[ItsOnNow]

Look,I know what you're all saying,but I just can't seem to make it happen. Comparing yourself isn't good,but I can't help it. I know I have to or should take action,but I can't bring myself out of it,probably from all these feelings. It's like I can't control my thoughts often times. It does feel like it is too late at times. I feel that way for different reasons. But that's about alot of things.

as for this...

Here is a list to start you off, pick one, or just get the jist of what I am suggesting:

1. Workout at gym (set schedule and goals)
2. Take a dance class (this will also make you sexier )
3. Take an art/photography/cooking class
4. Start jogging
5. Join a local soccar/basketball/canoeing team
6. Start going to the bar on Fridays ALONE. (I personally think being able to go out alone significantly helps you grow as a person)
7. Volunteer somewhere.

By the time you have gotten into this new activity, when you look around you will see you have a better attitude, maybe a new talent or attractive quality, and perhaps a new person or two in your life.

To get out of a rut, you must actively climb. Good luck.

I know. I can't bring myself to. I can't bring myself to do small things either Like such as keeping things clean. I have taken very few small steps to where I want to be. Dating/love life has been another thing bothering me,or lack of it. That's something for another time. I mean,really,somewhere,in my own social development,I never learned or figured out how to talk to women. This has bothered me the most. It could be for many reasons.

 

[iqqi]

I know. I can't bring myself to. I can't bring myself to do small things either Like such as keeping things clean. I have taken very few small steps to where I want to be. Dating/love life has been another thing bothering me,or lack of it. That's something for another time. I mean,really,somewhere,in my own social development,I never learned or figured out how to talk to women. This has bothered me the most. It could be for many reasons.

Well then you will not get anywhere.

It's your life. Do or don't do with it what you will (or won't).

 

[ItsOnNow]

That's what's been killing me. It may be some sort of total dissatisfaction in life.

 

[wolf116]

Ok I'll make it real simple so you can figure it out.

Do this right now. Go to the local gym and sign up.


There, wasn't that easy. You are now a member of your local gym.

 

[ItsOnNow]

I have a home gym,plus financially,things have been tight. Another thing killing me. I have impulse spending problems. All I have wanted is the chicks really. Yet,I seemingly can't. Whether it's mental or physical,I don't know. Also,I can't stop thinking about sex. Normal,I know,but I can't help but feel awkward/bad when I always hear about people getting more than me,having more game,being with more girls,etc. Hearing people lost it earlier than me,and more experience.

 

[wolf116]

I have a home gym,plus financially,things have been tight. Another thing killing me. I have impulse spending problems. All I have wanted is the chicks really. Yet,I seemingly can't. Whether it's mental or physical,I don't know.

Unless you have a squat rack your home gym is pointless.

Are you training?

How many pounds of muscle have you gained this year?

Look I'm always giving this advice to the real fvcked up guys here because it helped me more the anything despite my social anxiety disorder.

I don't care what's wrong with you, if you're in fantastic shape you will get laid. All you have to do is place a picture of your body on an internet dating site.

I have a hot fvck buddy and an ex who wants me any time I like even though going out makes me want to spew, and it's not due to some secret pick-up line.

 

[ItsOnNow]

I don't if I am really fcked up.

I have not much muscle,I have always been,well,fat. And that has bothered me. Not as much as it may seem though.

That is what I want in some ways. To be like,when they see me," I would fck him" But I also want something more real than that with someone.

See,you have fck buddies and ex's that still want you that you can see. I don't. So there feels like there is this big void in my life. I'm not looking for some secret line or learning all these tricks. No,I want something more than that.

 

[wolf116]

Before I got into shape I had the same void.

All I wanted was a GF. your desires change over time.

Also the testosterone and endorphins your body produces will effect your attitude and motivation.