"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I need help

Reyez1

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Ok heres my situation I am 5'7 and I use to weigh 170 pounds. I am now 130 pounds, but I am still fat. :( Basically I look skinny everywhere except my torso. I have love handles and a gut. My chest also has some fat kinda flabby I guess you could say. It's my form it's horrible. I can grab anywhere on my torso, and a nick chunk of fat will be in my hand...None of it is loose skin or anything, my skin went right back, i'm young (16). It's just fat, now how do I go about losing the fat from my torso, without lifting weights...

When my transformation is done, I want to look like a model, and be ripped. (yes girly man) I don't really want to bulk up. I just want to get skinny first (no fat on my torso) then I will start to lift weights from there to get ripped(not bulky). From what I read on these boards so far, it seems that cardio is what would help me the most? Thank you for your help.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Reyez1

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Some additional information. I look skinny with most articles of clothing, but you put on a real form fitting shirt on me, then you will see my horrible form. due to my love handles, I have an hour glass shape. Wide chest, wide mid section,love handles. but between my chest and ahndles, it goes in. I have a small waist was well, size 30.
 

Reyez1

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I dropped from 170 to 130 because at 170 I was pretty fat. I even started to get strech marks on my inner upper arm. As soon as I saw that strech mark, I wanted to lose weight. I was also shorter before, maybe 5'4, or 5'5. I was overweight according to BMI, so I wasn't just me hallucinating making stuff up in my head. You look at male models(yes girly men) they weigh like 160 at 5'11. So thats about the same for me 130 at 5'7. I may want to even gain 5 pounds. Thing is my form is horrible, hate my shape. Everybody thinks i'm skinny, and I do look it, but take my shirt off, and theres my gut and love handles. :(

The reason why I don't lift weights, is because my endocinologist is agaisnt it, she says it will stunt my growth. She gave me the whole discussion how and why. I forgot it, but she was convincing never the less. Something about making the growth plates fuse ealier than normal. She also had a dr in training with her, it was a male. He agreed with her and said, "If I didn't start lifting weights at a young age, I am sure that i'd be taller now. All of my brothers are way taller than me to." I want my growth plates to fuse before I get in to lifting weights.

So Cardio will get rid of my gut and love handles then? I've even been contemplating lipo sculture. My shape is disgusting. :( Makes me insecure, slows me down with the ladies, if you know what I mean.
 

Reyez1

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I was about to start eating less, and it would of been mostly chicken salad or something. Hmm so 2000 calories? Ok, I will try that. Thanks for the tip.

Edit: Should I stay away from carbs and just eat protien?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Ixnys

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Men usually store fat in their gut so it's no surprise that's the only place you have fat left...last fat to go.

Continue to do cardio 3-5 times a week. Continue to eat well. Remember, if you want to loose fat you need to create a calorie deficit.

You're 16 so you should be able to stay active if you have physical ed classes or play a sport.

If your parents are willing to take you to an endocinologist who says you shouldn't lift weights, they should at least set up an appointment with a nutritionist who can help you attain your goals. A nutritionist could analyze you and educate you on an eating style that would benefit you for the rest of your life.

If they won't do that at least by "The Sports Nutriion Guidebook" by Nancy Clark. Everything you need to know about eating right...
 

semag

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you're fukkin 16, you can lift weights.

You're not gonna gain in weight fast enough to be lifting anything that will even come close to hurting you for like 2 years anyway, and your "I don't wanna bulk up" statement is kinda wack. If you could pick up a dumbell and suddenly be 10 lbs heavier, there wouldn't be all this talk on bulkin and stuff.
 

DJBen

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hahaha... semag, you sounded pretty much like diesel then :p

That stuff on your gut could be retained water. The flab on your arms? Possibly excess skin. you lost a lot of weight, your skin will take ages to 'be tight again'

Now there are solutions to this

Losing gut: try drinking plenty of water. Not just a lot of tea/juice... plain and old fasioned water. you might notice your abs showing through, you might not, but stick with that for a month and see if it's made a difference.

Put on some muscle. Why? To fill that skin out.

Trust me, if I gain 10lbs of quality muscle in 6 months, I'd be stoked. It's not as easy as you think ;)
 

Reyez1

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Thanks guys for all the replys. I plan on visiting a nutritionist actually. Sometime this month my parents will take me. I don't have any flab on my arms. Every body part looks skinny besides my gut. I have a lil bit of fat on the side of my pecks though, or hmm side of my ribs.

About 16 being ok to lift weights, I don't know about that. My Endocrinologist says differently. I would think she knows what shes talking about shes a dr and all. I really do want to lift wieghts to, but I do not want to compromise my height. My goal weight would proberbly be 140 pounds with 8% body fat or less if possible. :) My goal weight will change depending on my final height of course.
 

Nocturnal

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Are you kidding? Do you know how many thousands to hundreds of thousands of kids 16 and younger are lifting weights for high school sports? Unless there is something specifically wrong with you, I give you a 100% ok for lifting weights. Just look at the agregate data - it's right there.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Reyez1

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Believe me dude, I said the same thing. You know how many of my friends are lifting weights? Every last one of them... She still says what she says though. You can tell her 70% of 16 yo's lift weights, but she will still say the oppisite. As I said before, she gave an explaination as to why, but I forgot most of it. It had to do with the growth plates fusing earlier than normal. Even if I wanted to lift weights and go agaisnt my Endocrinologists recommedations, I can't. I can't join a gym without my parents paying for it. They also believe what my Endocrinologist is saying.
 

MindOverMatter

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If you wanna just lose the fat and be skinny, do cardio and watch your calories.

I was in the same situation 2 years ago. I was 6'2, 230 lbs, had a beer pouch + love handles. Did cardio only at first, everyday for about 2 months, dropped down to 180 lbs. Then I was really skinny, all that cardio made me lose a lot of muscle mass.

But my bodyfat was near gone, and I began my strength training. Now I'm at 215lbs again, but I have next to no fat. My goal is to be 250 one day with 10% bf.
 

Nocturnal

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Originally posted by Reyez1
Believe me dude, I said the same thing. You know how many of my friends are lifting weights? Every last one of them... She still says what she says though. You can tell her 70% of 16 yo's lift weights, but she will still say the oppisite. As I said before, she gave an explaination as to why, but I forgot most of it. It had to do with the growth plates fusing earlier than normal. Even if I wanted to lift weights and go agaisnt my Endocrinologists recommedations, I can't. I can't join a gym without my parents paying for it. They also believe what my Endocrinologist is saying.
Does your school have a gym? Also maybe you could try getting a second opinion.
 

Ixnys

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Article

It's from the American College of Sports Medicine. Strength training IS beneficial to EVERYONE. However it would be important to start out with a qualified trainer who could show you how to perform exercises with correct form. While you're at it check out this link with even more articles you might find helpful.

Link
 

DJBen

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I wish I started lifting when I was 15/16, and not seventeen. I'd be a god damn monster by now.

Theres always someone out there that has their own belief on everything. It's fine to lift at 16. Go hit the weight room.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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roscoe211

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There is no way you're going to damage growth plates at 130lbs. People hurt themselves by lifting improperly- bad form and lifting more than they can handle- and at 130lbs you're nowhere even close to that. If you're worried about that just go with low weight/ high reps- like db reps of 12-15, 3-4 sets. Atleast that way you'll be stimulating your muscles without putting too much strain on them. Also once you lose that fat you're going to want to have a little definition. Basically, lift like a chick.
 

Reyez1

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Yes my school has a gym. The lifting like a chick isn't a bad idea. I definitly do want definition at the very least...whats funny is, I even asked my Endocrinologist if push ups are bad to? She thought about it for about 10 seconds and said "ya it is, because you're just lifting your own weight." Sigh, can't even do push ups...lol. Anyways, I will start lifting weights at my school gym, but I won't go heavy. 40 pounds bench press seems like an okay number, just enough to stimulate my muscles.

Thank you for the helpful links.
 
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