"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I need help at parties...

harkkam08

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Okay I need help guys approaching people at parties, Im having trouble because it seems there is so much going against you.

The music is loud
People group off into their own circles

What is a guy who goes alone supposed to do?

I know he should build up social worth and credit. But thats hard.

Here let me post a video of a party. I live in NYC.

Now imagine you were standing next to the camera man. What am I supposed to do other than just stand around.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVLDBELy_X4&feature=related

Thanks guys
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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hondo928

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Literally just do it, or you could search for the thread called dancing bible, there is some stuff in there.
 

hondo928

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Literally just do it, or you could search for the thread called dancing bible, there is some stuff in there.
 

kdnash82

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Why do people feel the need to dance every time they go out? Dancing isn't the panty dropper. Not to brag, but I am a pretty good dancer. Yet, sometimes when I go out, I won't dance at all. One particualr place I'm a reg at, I've spent a night of having chicks ask me to dance all night, and I turned each one of them down. So don't feel that you have to dance every time you go out. It's ok to enjoy the environment.

Back to the point. In a situation like the one from the video, the first thing I would do would be to grab myself a drink. Usually, I would grab two (one for drinking and one for show), but this place looks too packed to be walking around double fisting.

I would start on the outside of this huge crowd and walk around the mob, as I circle this mob, I would continue to make my way towards the center. The whole point of me doing this, is to get my face seen and to see others who I might enjoy spending my time with. If I make it to the center and have yet to see anyone I'm remotely interested in, then I'd probably just leave.

Upon finding people whether they're male or female, that I would be interested in hanging out with, I introduce myself, and start up a conversation. Doesn't matter what it's about. If you're friendly, then most people respond well. Just don't come off as the creepy douche who tried to speak to me guy.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Furyguy

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A better place, a better time.
"Yo, nice hat! What's your name?"

Yell "Cheers!" and clink bottles.

Or go find some fat or lonely chick and use her as a stepping stone to the friends she probably has.
 

SinJester

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Your making it working against you rather than for you. Just think everyone goes to parties to be social and meet new people. No one wants to go out and just stand around with the group of friends they see every day. Also think about how much effort the girls put in to looking good. They spend hours on their hair, makeup, clothes etc, and it's all to get the attention of guys.

People are a lot more open to being approached at parties. You can also get a lot closer to them because of the noise so kino is a lot easier. I don't really like dancing or the loud noise either, so I tend to stay a bit outside and make conversations with people there.

Once you start meeting people you will see them throughout the night and that will make it easier and give you social proof.
 
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