I Messed Things Up With Her.. I Think

lamath

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This is what I mean bruv... A minor thing has been turned into a shyte storm by her... Almost a power struggle.

I sent her a couple of messages to try to ease the tension... but I got back a simple OK xx one word reply.

I don't want to be texting her, while she can't be bothered saying more than one word.

Maybe silence and distance is the only option now.

She wanted a relationship with me, yet she can't get over something like this? What would the future be like.

Imo this is a indication of poor problem resolution skills. Not something you want i a ltr.

She is making you feel guilty. She knows what she is doing.
 
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soulforge

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Well i do think relationships are work and they CAN be worth it. Especially if both parties are younger, you basically are teaching one another your boundaries and how you expect to be treated. Both ways. But if she has too much baggage or issues then it probably isn’t worth working together on a relationship. You need to start with a quality person and try to stay away from train wrecks. That’s just my opinion. Drug abusers usually have deeper, underlying issues that you cannot work with.
So yeah, it’s up to you if it’s worth it. People can and do change but it takes awareness and a willingness to want to be a better person. Sorry but this chick seems immature, selfish (which is fine to a point but not totally in relationships) and unaware. You could probably do better. Stay focused on yourself and keep your expectations and standards high.
I just feel annoyed with myself for telling her off...

I should have simply left it at that... And never called her in the morning again.

I just need to know what to do moving forward?

I guess we are both to blame here.. I have tried easing the tension.

But I don't think I should continue reaching out.
 

Dash Riprock

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So been seeing her 3-4 months.

Yes some red flags she has, but I have been assessing her, without rushing in head first.. Watch and observe is my policy.

I gave her exclusivity recently too.

Here is where I think I furked up..

A couple of days ago, she asked me to ring her occasionally early in the morning, so she can get out of bed and do some excercise..

She said she struggles to get up, so me waking her up makes sense.

I rang her this morning and she didn't pick up the phone.. I waited an hour and called back, again she didn't pick up.

3 hours later she sends me a text message apologising & stating she slept through my calls and didn't hear the alarm either.

I called her up, and I have to admit I was a little pizzed off.

I simply said, why ask me to ring you, if either your phone isn't set to loud enough to wake you? Or your just not going to wake up because you sleep so deep.

To me it just seemed illogical, that I am trying to wake someone up who doesn't even hear the phone.

After the phone call, I could tell she seemed miffed off about me telling her off.

I have to admit, I feel bad about saying anything to her... I should have just rang her, she didn't pick up, just get on with my day, and make a point not to call her again.

She seems angry about it, and her text message back to me, have been very limited.

Maybe she is expecting me to apologise or to CHASE her.

I should have stayed quiet or simply not bothered ringing her at all.. Not my job to act like your alarm clock.

Her last text message to me was a simple...Ok Xx

If she doesn't message me tonight or tomorrow, should I just ghost and move on?

I feel like she is making a drama out of this or testing my frame.
Dude, you've been on SS for awhile now. WTF?

Girl: Ring me occasionally early in the morning, so I can get out of bed and do some exercise.
Dash: Do you have a phone with an alarm or alarm clock?
Girl: Yes....
Dash: Best you use it. I'm a very busy man and can't play "wake up service guy."
Girl: <no response, silent>
Dash: Let's get drinks at X on Y date, time.
Girl: Maybe <mad now>
Dash: Ok, gotta go. See ya.

Either she calls me and accepts my date and we go out and have fun or she's an irresponsible AW looking for a daddy not a bf and I dump her. Win-win either way.
 

guru1000

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I sent her a couple of messages to try to ease the tension... but I got back a simple OK xx one word reply.
It's not your job to ease the tension from one who is attempting to manipulate you. Instead, you should exacerbate the tension. She tested you because she saw a cupcake who will soldier to her beck and call, and she was right.

I informed you three times not to entertain exclusivity with this girl because of her questionable character and questioned you as to why you go exclusive with EVERY girl including your last three knowing they were all broken. And all your relations end the same way; with them abusing you or breaking up with you, and then you go from the "General Discussion" right back to the "No Contact" thread.

And here you go again ... Round Three. When will you learn that your exclusivity is a treasure not to be given freely to anyone?

I will not advise you on this one. I will wait for her to manipulate you and have her way until she drops you or the disrespect is so great you must walk away. Then I will be here to set your mind correct, and you will never again accept exclusivity from the unworthy.
 

soulforge

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It's not your job to ease the tension from one who is attempting to manipulate you. Instead, you should exacerbate the tension. She tested you because she saw a cupcake who will soldier to her beck and call, and she was right.

I informed you three times not to entertain exclusivity with this girl because of her questionable character and questioned you as to why you go exclusive with EVERY girl including your last three knowing they were all broken. And all your relations end the same way; with them abusing you or breaking up with you, and then you go from the "General Discussion" right back to the "No Contact" thread.

And here you go again ... Round Three. When will you learn that your exclusivity is a treasure not to be given freely to anyone?

I will not advise you on this one. I will wait for her to manipulate you and have her way until she drops you or the disrespect is so great you must walk away. Then I will be here to set your mind correct, and you will never again accept exclusivity from the unworthy.
Guru I totally took on board your advice... However I wanted to observe what I was dealing with here.

My gut instinct does not sit well with her.. Especially now that I have seen, how she has taken something a rational person could easily resolve and turned it into such a big deal.

I can assure you, I will absolutely not give her exclusivity.

Infact she just messaged me this...

I hope you had a good day.. I am really tired and off to bed soon.xx

The difference is... No babe.. No direct question about hows my day been etc..

This is ALL power games now...

As far as I am concerned, she is not relationship worthy.. And moving forward, I won't even entertain the idea.
 
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Spaz

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A couple of weeks ago I warned you that you're been White Knighted.

You proven it then but not understanding the deeper meaning when I said it.

And here u r now proving it by ur actions.

Next time when the women in the forum goes on the recruitment drive, don't simply join in.
 

Spaz

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You didn’t help stop the storm. That’s why i like alpha men that have stopped me in my tracks and called me out. Helped me see i was being a c*nt and to stop playing immature games. Be a man, stop reaching out to her. :)
So far you're the only woman on this board/forum who is telling him exactly how is it with women.

Now you have value in Sosuave.
 

soulforge

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So her message to me tonight is far from the lovey dovey message she would normally send.

Didn't ask how my day was?
Didn't call me babe like she normally does?


Obviously her behaviour towards me has changed.

My impression is she is trying to keep me on the hook for a while?

Or she is trying to downgrade me to non exclusive again


How do I play this? Ghost her azz

Or just fukin keep smashing her... with ZERO exclusivity.


I have to admit I have some feels for her, so continue to smash her mightbe difficult.
 

SeekerOfTheWay

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So her message to me tonight is far from the lovey dovey message she would normally send.

Didn't ask how my day was?
Didn't call me babe like she normally does?


Obviously her behaviour towards me has changed.

My impression is she is trying to keep me on the hook for a while?

Or she is trying to downgrade me to non exclusive again


How do I play this? Ghost her azz

Or just fukin keep smashing her... with ZERO exclusivity.


I have to admit I have some feels for her, so continue to smash her mightbe difficult.
STOP! Stop obsessing, stop thinking about it. You are wasting your precious time and energy on this. Put the phone away at this point. Delete her number. Go exercise or do yoga (sorry, i don’t know what men do to clear their heads). The problem is now not her. For your own sake, stop.

You are WAY too attached to have casual sex with her. She WILL keep manipulating you and you’re likely to lose yourself and focus. Just stop. Do anything else but think and post about her. You are def obsessing. If anything, go bang someone else Stat.

If you accept her behavior and are okay with being under her control, that’s fine too. It’s your choice. But you need to be willing to accept all that comes with that (hint: misery).

Don’t listen to your feelings right now. As a female that’s something i have to practice over and over. But you’re a dude. Fall back on your logic. Think through how this will end. Even if you end up having something with her, right now you arent in a good place. She will cause you drama.
 
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soulforge

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STOP! Stop obsessing, stop thinking about it. You are wasting your precious time and energy on this. Put the phone away at this point. Delete her number. Go exercise or do yoga (sorry, i don’t know what men do to clear their heads). The problem is now not her. For your own sake, stop.

I just need to know what my next move is...

She is still messaging me, but not like the usual...

Do i play along? Or just ignore her, till she starts treating me with some respect?
 
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DEEZEDBRAH

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So been seeing her 3-4 months.

Yes some red flags she has, but I have been assessing her, without rushing in head first.. Watch and observe is my policy.

I gave her exclusivity recently too.
Not doing it right.

Has red flags and you gave exclusivity? 3-4months and exclusivity? What in the **** sort of circus are you running? You then deem you may have ****ed up with her?

Lulz if the above is not telling lol

Here is where I think I furked up..

A couple of days ago, she asked me to ring her occasionally early in the morning, so she can get out of bed and do some excercise..

She said she struggles to get up, so me waking her up makes sense.
Wtf???

Its called a alarm.

You officially became dancing monkey.

I rang her this morning and she didn't pick up the phone.. I waited an hour and called back, again she didn't pick up.
Dancing monkey!!!


3 hours later she sends me a text message apologising & stating she slept through my calls and didn't hear the alarm either.

I called her up, and I have to admit I was a little pizzed off.

I simply said, why ask me to ring you, if either your phone isn't set to loud enough to wake you? Or your just not going to wake up because you sleep so deep.

To me it just seemed illogical, that I am trying to wake someone up who doesn't even hear the phone.

After the phone call, I could tell she seemed miffed off about me telling her off.

I have to admit, I feel bad about saying anything to her... I should have just rang her, she didn't pick up, just get on with my day, and make a point not to call her again.

She seems angry about it, and her text message back to me, have been very limited.

Maybe she is expecting me to apologise or to CHASE her.

I should have stayed quiet or simply not bothered ringing her at all.. Not my job to act like your alarm clock.

Her last text message to me was a simple...Ok Xx

If she doesn't message me tonight or tomorrow, should I just ghost and move on?

I feel like she is making a drama out of this or testing my frame.
You should take your valls out of her murse and man the ****kkk up.

You dun goofed.

She puts up a hoop and you pranced through the it out of the most phaggotry of nature.

You can't chase excellence and be on phaggotry times simping.

Step your game up kuz .
 
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DEEZEDBRAH

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I just need to know what my next move is...

She is still messaging me, but not like the usual...

Do i play along? Or just ignore her, till she starts treating me with some respect?
#nextset

Her lowered interest is due to your simping
On tren.

You can only serve 1master. The benchmark is excellence, purpose, ambitions etc. The simping is drying up her vagina.

Anything that dares take you off the Hero's Journey is unacceptable.

She should be sucking a Whole lot of D in the words of AMS + making you sandwiches.

Meanwhile, you continue to simp.

She ****s up and you're still at her beck and call. Her alarm and being snorlax is her problem
 

soulforge

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Not doing it right.

Has red flags and you gave exclusivity? 3-4months and exclusivity? What in the **** sort of circus are you running? You then deem you may have ****ed up with her?

Lulz if the above is not telling lol



Wtf???

Its called a alarm.

You officially became dancing monkey.



Dancing monkey!!!
3 hours later she sends me a text message apologising & stating she slept through my calls and didn't hear the alarm either.

I called her up, and I have to admit I was a little pizzed off.

I simply said, why ask me to ring you, if either your phone isn't set to loud enough to wake you? Or your just not going to wake up because you sleep so deep.

To me it just seemed illogical, that I am trying to wake someone up who doesn't even hear the phone.

After the phone call, I could tell she seemed miffed off about me telling her off.

I have to admit, I feel bad about saying anything to her... I should have just rang her, she didn't pick up, just get on with my day, and make a point not to call her again.

She seems angry about it, and her text message back to me, have been very limited.

Maybe she is expecting me to apologise or to CHASE her.

I should have stayed quiet or simply not bothered ringing her at all.. Not my job to act like your alarm clock.

Her last text message to me was a simple...Ok Xx

If she doesn't message me tonight or tomorrow, should I just ghost and move on?

I feel like she is making a drama out of this or testing my frame.
[/QUOTE]

You should take your valls out of her murse and man the ****kkk up.

You dun goofed.

She puts up a hoop and you pranced through the it out of the most phaggotry of nature.

You can't chase excellence and be on phaggotry times simping.

Step your game up kuz .
[/QUOTE]


Yeh man big mistake....

The list of red flags is huge.. Maybe this is the wake up call I needed..

Giving this chick Exlusivity or a relationship is going to be Disastrous!
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Yeh man big mistake....

The list of red flags is huge.. Maybe this is the wake up call I needed..

Giving this chick Exlusivity or a relationship is going to be Disastrous!
Begin spinning plates.

I would be crushing. I doubt you will be given your focus (or lack thereof).

Simping, being at her beck and call drys up the vagina.

You shouldn't be out of the honey moon phase 3-4months in. And unexclusive.

Exclusivity = women going full retard!

Rollo is annoying but, he's spot on with FRAME.

What frame is it for you to wait 3hrs calling her nonstop is out of the question?

Women are either kittens or ****s to men. Put her ass in check. Be willing to walk.
 

soulforge

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Begin spinning plates.

I would be crushing. I doubt you will be given your focus (or lack thereof).

Simping, being at her beck and call drys up the vagina.

You shouldn't be out of the honey moon phase 3-4months in. And unexclusive.

Exclusivity = women going full retard!

Rollo is annoying but, he's spot on with FRAME.

What frame is it for you to wait 3hrs calling her nonstop is out of the question?

Women are either kittens or ****s to men. Put her ass in check. Be willing to walk.

Your right I gave her exclusivity too soon... My plan is to pull back completely...

Totally minimise any contact with her.... let her do the reaching out... and if she doesn't, then NEXT

Give her simple replies, if and when I am ready.

She calls me? I miss her call.

No more kisses, or babe etc etc.... holding hands NO MORE

Smash her azz, then send her home....

The red flags are too HIGH with this one.. giving her a relationship could potentially mean destroying my own life.
 
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lamath

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STOP! Stop obsessing, stop thinking about it. You are wasting your precious time and energy on this. Put the phone away at this point. Delete her number. Go exercise or do yoga (sorry, i don’t know what men do to clear their heads). The problem is now not her. For your own sake, stop.

You are WAY too attached to have casual sex with her. She WILL keep manipulating you and you’re likely to lose yourself and focus. Just stop. Do anything else but think and post about her. You are def obsessing. If anything, go bang someone else Stat.

If you accept her behavior and are okay with being under her control, that’s fine too. It’s your choice. But you need to be willing to accept all that comes with that (hint: misery).

Don’t listen to your feelings right now. As a female that’s something i have to practice over and over. But you’re a dude. Fall back on your logic. Think through how this will end. Even if you end up having something with her, right now you arent in a good place. She will cause you drama.
This is good advice

It feels like you are losing self control man

Take a step back.

She is acting in a displeasing way so your interest in her should decrease.
Handle things that reflect that way of thinking
I know it not really how it work but imo its always the best way to handle similar situation.

Dont overreact, no need to react or have a plan right away.

Work on what is under your control.
 

soulforge

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This is good advice

It feels like you are losing self control man

Take a step back.

She is acting in a displeasing way so your interest in her should decrease.
Handle things that reflect that way of thinking
I know it not really how it work but imo its always the best way to handle similar situation.

So even if you

I get you man... she certainly is acting in a displeasing way.

My intention is to back the fuk off completely..

She reached out tonight, but I WILL not be reaching out to her..

Either she continues to reach out... or I let it die.

I am not happy with her behaviour.... downgraded to fuk buddy now.
 

lamath

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I get you man... she certainly is acting in a displeasing way.

My intention is to back the fuk off completely..

She reached out tonight, but I WILL not be reaching out to her..

Either she continues to reach out... or I let it die.

I am not happy with her behaviour.... downgraded to fuk buddy now.
Imo
You should lett he situation cool off before you decide to take action on it. Dont forget what happened, but slow down
A cold and calculated reaction is way better

No rush here man.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Your right I gave her exclusivity too soon... My plan is to pull back completely...
I'm red pill awareness on steroids. Full on meat head.

I will walk away if a woman's out of pocket. I don't care for how hawtttt.

The sec you give exclusivity, its just begging for problems. Women especially in western society are a by product of the train wreck culture. They need to be in check.

Kitten or **** brah!

Totally minimise any contact with her.... let her do the reaching out... and if she doesn't, then NEXT

Give her simple replies, if and when I am ready.

She calls me? I miss her call.
Women want their closure but if they **** off, its done.

No games. No texts. Let her call.

Go get baeees now.

Rollo is annoying but bang on with plate theory. Options are ideal for dread game.

Its why being married sucks cause women get fat, out of pocket and the state will jsil you plus extract resources.

No more kisses, or babe etc etc.... holding hands NO MORE

Smash her azz, then send her home....

The red flags are too HIGH with this one.. giving her a relationship could potentially mean destroying my own life.
Chalk it up as a learning experience.

Mate, I'm 30. I never give up exclusivity. I come with a invisible warning, will not commit.
 

17 shots

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Just because you apologize about something, doesn't mean you deserve an immediate resolution. That person doesn't have to immediately forgive you, and act like nothing happened. You give them space to think it over, and let them come back around if they want to

I'm sure you've been in a similar situation before where someone apologized to you, and it took you a while to warm up to them again. You didn't plan on never talking to them again, but you were still a little upset by how they treated you. You needed a day or two to really move past it mentally

She ended up texting you, so it's fine now. Let her act a little weird for a minute, it's no big deal. You over reacted about a phone call, and yelled at her for no reason, and now you're acting like you're the victim, but you're not
 
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