i know its impossible to escape from the friendzone, but the other way around?

[seth03]

Let me get to the point: I've known this girl since early february. She invited me over to her basement at 1a.m. the first night we hung out, but i didn't know how to make a move, and it was hard b/c we were both on seperate couches and the lights were on. (any tips for that situation?). I was so disappointed with myself, and thats when i first started coming to this site. So, ever since then, she's been calling me to hang out pretty much every week for the past 4 months, but only with her girlfriends around. My question is: I know she put me into the boyfriend zone when we first met...do you know if she put me into the friend zone now, or do you think its impossible to escape from the "boyfriend zone" once your in?

Question 2: The only reason i havent advanced on her is because i have no experience with girls...i havent even kissed one, and this girl is a ****ing swimsuit model. Does anyone have any tips for a person who doesn't have experience with a girl, and has the chance to **** one? Would you go for it, or would you practice on someone uglier first?

 

[seth03]

ok well since nobody knew how to reply to that one, can you at least tell me if telling her directly that "i want to pursue a relationship with her" is a bad or good idea. And if she says she doesnt want to, do you think the least AFC reaction would be to just say ok thats cool, and mention that il find another girl?

 

[CrzyBadBoyDJ]

Next time she comes over, get alittle closer to her, start acting more like you are interested in her sexually/physically. Try to get her alone, and not bring her friends. Sit near her, and use kino. Keep it light hearted, watch a movie that doesn't leave you feeling depressed or something.

You can even go on an action date, like bowling.


Re-reading the Bible might help you, too. there are some posts about escaping the friends zone.

 

[fukuy]

ok well since nobody knew how to reply to that one, can you at least tell me if telling her directly that "i want to pursue a relationship with her" is a bad or good idea. And if she says she doesnt want to, do you think the least AFC reaction would be to just say ok thats cool, and mention that il find another girl?
Dont ever , and i mean never, never discuss about your relationship with a girl. Dont ask those passive questions such as yours or " lets be boyfriends girlfriends " stuff. Action speaks louder than words, and that's truely applied to a woman case.
If you want her sexually, show that to her in a sexual way.

 

[seth03]

yes! finally some damn good advice. i've been staying up waiting for a reply from somebody for so long. thanks so much dude. one of my good friends who is good with girls actualy told me to do that 'pursue a relationship' line, and now i just realized how much it would suck if i said that. thank you soo much.

by the way, i called her today and told her i'm going to pick her up tomorrow at 6:00, and for her to cancel all her plans. She agreed. So far, my plans are to go to chuck e cheese or bowling (just fun stupid **** to keep it light).

 

[Vincent]

Originally posted by seth03
do you know if she put me into the friend zone now, or do you think its impossible to escape from the "boyfriend zone" once your in?
Question 2: The only reason i havent advanced on her is because i have no experience with girls...i havent even kissed one, and this girl is a ****ing swimsuit model. Does anyone have any tips for a person who doesn't have experience with a girl, and has the chance to **** one? Would you go for it, or would you practice on someone uglier first?

First off, Your most definetely in the friends zone. No its not impossible to remove yourself from the LJBF zone, but the real question is, is it worth it? 9 times out of 10 you'll find out its more work than its worth.

Your date is going to be most likely, more of just friends hanging out. But if you play your cards right, you can turn it around. If she's still holding you in the zone, you might want to move on.

Question 2: You know what, i wa like you. Never kissed a girl, very little to no relationship experience, and i let it hold me back. You know what i said to that. Fvck that! Its not worth it worrying about how good you are, if they can't accept that, then they don't deserve you.

Always remember YOUR THE PRIZE CATCH, not her, she's just another fish like hundreds of thousands of other fish, but your one in a billion.

 

[triple_ultima]

Actually, from the information provided, I don't think it's CERTAIN that you're in the friend zone...although it is definitely possible to "fall from grace" and leave the "boyfriend zone," as you call it.

Your problem is that you did not make a move when you had a chance. So what if you were on seperate couches? Unless her parents were around, that's not an obstacle, and neither is the lights being on. What do you do in that situation? You get up, walk over to her couch, sit down right next to her, and give her a huge grin. That's what I would've done.

And please, for the love of God, don't go somewhere stupid like chuck-e-cheese. Bowling, yes, definitely. Bowling can be a great way to have fun on a date. And be sure that on this date, you make your intentions clear.

Grab your balls and go for it. Get some kino in. Maybe even a neg-hit or two. But by the end of the night, make sure that she knows that YOU are interested in HER, and that it is HER turn to impress you.

Here's a quick tip that I LOVE: Create a points system. If she says something you don't approve of, say "Oh. Minus 15 points." She'll say "what are you talking about?" Then I always like to say something like "Well, you aren't doing so good...you have negative 150 points now. You better regain some." Just wait until she asks what she can do to regain points. Then you're golden.

 

[BGMan]

Originally posted by seth03
yes! finally some damn good advice. i've been staying up waiting for a reply from somebody for so long. thanks so much dude. one of my good friends who is good with girls actualy told me to do that 'pursue a relationship' line, and now i just realized how much it would suck if i said that. thank you soo much.

by the way, i called her today and told her i'm going to pick her up tomorrow at 6:00, and for her to cancel all her plans. She agreed. So far, my plans are to go to chuck e cheese or bowling (just fun stupid **** to keep it light).

I'd disagree with the others here. Seth03, I think that you have done exactly the right thing so far. The fact that she actually DID cancel all her plans to be with you should be a BIG indicator that you are NOT in her "friends zone". She has been basically "working on you" for a half a year; during that time, you and she have hopefully built a lot of rapport so you feel comfortable around each other. And, when girls like you, they help you, and she seems to have been doing that as well. So when you called her up, told her to drop everything and go out with you, she was probably delighted that you are now stepping up to the plate. Not only that, but showed Major Brass BallZ by telling her to "drop everything"! )

Don't talk about yourself too much, and don't be afraid of getting close to her -- or, rather, don't be afraid of letting her get close to you. If she starts to use Kino on YOU, and is having a totally awesome time, smiling and laughing, the probability is like 90% that she likes you romantically.

Also, be sure to see/date her once a week, and DO NOT ask her "where the relationship is going". You want HER to ask YOU that, and when she does, don't give her a straight answer. "Fun stupid sh!t to keep it light" is EXACTLY what you want to do with this girl.

Let us know how it goes!

BGMan