"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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I keep screwing up and backing down...

sbgm

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Hi! I have now confidence in talking with girls, and I can make girls like me. The problem is, when they advance a step, want to move the relationship forward, I always back down or screw the whole thing up. Ex. At a party, a girl teases (dirty dancing and dirty looks :p) me. I move over to her and dances with her for a while. She grabs my hand, but I move away! That would meant a laid if I hold her hand and followed her to where she were taking me. I thought " Oh my god, what should I do now, what should I say?"

It's like I'm afraid! Not scared of the girls, but scared of the relationship and the sexual/makeout things. I'm a virgin, so I guess that plays a part in this... What should I do? Have you been in a similar situation?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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sbgm

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Yes. It's also that I'm under pressure because my younger brother is not a virgin and I'm still a virgin. That's REALLY HARD. I'm also afraid of what my friends and family will say baout my girlfriend, will they like her? That stuff
please help me overcome this problem
 

SinJester

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I know how you feel man. Just know that it gets SOO much easier once you have done anything just once. Fvuck your friends and family, if YOU want her then YOU go for her. Don't let them hold you back, ever.
 

aussiegoat55

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Play it cool, take a deep breath, and relax.

I approve of you pulling back actually. I wouldn't want to make myself too "available" or easy to seduce by a woman. Don't be a man*****. They believe they have this power over you, to lead you to the bed in the hopes that you'll get laid, should be the other way around. The man should lead the woman.

Be careful of people who come on strong to you.

But in the case of your inexperience, take things slow, learn to perfect your kissing, then advance to the next bases.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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sbgm

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I have probably dissed like three good looking girls (HBs 7-8) last semester because I felt insecure and did not know what to do. Do you think I still have a chance with them or should I wait for other girls to come? :p
I need to know what I should do on the dancefloor and such, I think. Is there any threads dealing with that topic?
 

sbgm

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bump
 

oh yes.swayay

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lol, what are you afraid of? It's all in fun. Don't think about it as such a big deal. Just wing it and be confident that you'll know what to do when the time comes. If you become nervous, take in a nice belly full of air and exhale. I've found that doing that really helps to calm the nerves.

About dance floor etiquette, I'm sure there should be a thread or article about it somewhere. But from my own experience, I could tell you that you should try to have/be fun from the moment you get there. Because once you start the night off as a wall flower, it's usually REALLY hard to get into the fun rhythm of things and when you do make an attempt it usually feels (and looks) forced. The instant you enter the room, look around with your head high and start feeling the rhythm of the music, make all your necessary greetings to friends who aren't already dancing, then head straight for the dance floor. Don't give the wallflower in you ANY chance of taking over.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Like, what everyone else said just relax. Hell, if there is beer at the party have a few drinks. That will calm you down. How old are you anyway?
 

sbgm

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I'm seventeen
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

oh yes.swayay

Don Juan
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yea, if you don't think you're ready enough for sober confidence, alcohol will work wonders. Just don't get too drunk. :up:
 
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