I have realized that...

[ItsOnNow]

I think part of my problem is that I tend to see some if not most people above me,probably because I feel behind most people in some if not most aspects of life. What can I do to get over this feeling? This sense of inferiority. Shyness/anxiety? In a sense,I don't want to end up like this guy,http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=bill122460+&search_type=, he has his points,but he does come off a bit creepy/crazy.

 

[ready123]

huh?

 

[DonutMan]

huh?

I agree, rephrase that. Doesn't make any sense, or your just a lot smarter then I am.

 

[DonutMan]

OK, Just read your question over a few times... Starting to understand what youre trying to say. How about some examples as to why you "feel behind people in most aspects of life"?

 

[ItsOnNow]

I fixed it.Meant to say above...

 

[DonutMan]

Why do you feel inferior, shy, anxious? What aspects do feel behind in? Also, try to think of some ways that you may be ahead of others. There are definitely things that you are good at that others are not. Tell us more about yourself.

 

[WC2]

There's a simple answer to this question. Improve yourself. I don't care if you have to pickup a book that tells you how to, just do it. Do it tomorrow.

But please don't turn into someone who sits at home and reads self improvement books for years. Read a chapter every night and take that advice out with you the next day and DO SOMETHING. These books are only as good as you make them.

Your self worth is the most important aspect of any man. Any man can write a script when it comes to ladies, but only true men who have a great deal of confidence and self worth have luck with not only women, but life in general.

I cannot tell you how much of a difference your self worth makes. I know I keep saying the word self worth, but DRILL it into your head. If you're not walking into the world everyday knowing that you're worth a great deal and knowing that you're not some average joe, then you're not living your life to the fullest.

If you're inferior when it comes to anxiety or shyness, then force yourself to do a little something everyday. Maybe it's saying hi to a woman while walking to school. Maybe it's starting a conversation with a complete stranger. Create goals everyday and completing these goals will make you feel all the better. There are great rewards in attempting to improve your life style. The hardest part is starting up the momentum.

 

[ItsOnNow]

That's just it. That's always been the answer. I think it may be cause by a deeply ingrained fear of sorts that may be easier said than done to get away from. I may be afraid of seeking contact with other people. This is bad. That plus coupled with lazyness,sense of self pity,doesn't help.

I feel inferior,shy,anxious,behind for many different reasons. Education,socially,plus bad social enocunters over the years may have left an imprint on me. Plus behind in dating/sex matters. Some if it I may be overthinking,some of it is a real problem.

That's it. I want to have the confidence/self worth. I have always had the goals,and the want for it,but maybe not the drive and effort to put in. It's like I want it,but can't work for it. In terms of everything. Plus,this sense of that well,I don't know if I am or how to attract the ladies. And being able to do it in the confident,classy way. Not like an "afc" or a completely manipulative jerk either. I feel like so much time has gone bye. I don't know if it has or hasn't.

Like you said,the hardest part is finding the momentum. Why does that happen? How does it happen?

 

[ItsOnNow]

I also may be thinking way too ahead. In terms of starting a family having/having children. The whole pass on the genes and ensure a future sort of thing. Yet I still have yet to figure out the whole dating system/game/attraction/also not being taken advantage of/maniupulated.

 

[DonutMan]

How old are you? Do you have a job? It's never to late get your education, find a community college and start from there. They are cheap and you can take night classes to get your degree while your working.

I'm not sure if this is the right way to look at it but, think about life, and how short it is. You want to get the most you can out of it, so you got to push yourself to try new things and challenge yourself in new ways. Don't dwell on the mistakes you may have made in the past, just learn from them and improve yourself. Don't let your sense of self worth come from whether or not you think the ladies are attracted to you....

 

[WC2]

I also may be thinking way too ahead. In terms of starting a family having/having children. The whole pass on the genes and ensure a future sort of thing. Yet I still have yet to figure out the whole dating system/game/attraction/also not being taken advantage of/maniupulated.

How old are you? Have you ever been in a relationship? If you haven't, theres really nothing to worry about. If anything this should make you WANT to get out there and see what the world is about.

Don't get too down on yourself, there are plenty of guys out there who have not experienced everything they should. Unless you're 50 going on 60, it's never too late.

I didn't totally grow into myself until I got to college. This forum is good for you in small doses, but you really need to make things happen in real life. Take a few steps each day like I said before, and you'll start feeling better about yourself. Don't joke yourself into thinking everyone on here has experienced much more than you have. In actuality, most of these guys have probably experienced the same or less. Do something today.

 

[ItsOnNow]

I am 22,will be 23 in august. And I don't know if it is just me,or I am overthinking things,or perhaps in some ways,I am behind others. I do have a job,have had same job 3 years now. Not complaining,but it is obviously not what I want to do forever. Well,i don't know if you would call it a relationship,but there was this girl I was going out with,3 years ago now,and she was my first. I made many mistakes such as being a bit clingy,validation seeking,and pushing for a serious relationship when I should have just been enjoying it all.

Then,last time I was actually with someone,was April of 06. So yeah,maybe you can see where I am coming from with the whole feeling behind everyone else,i.e other girls and guys. It just feels like I keep repeating the same thing over and over,since I was 16. I am not talking about just guys or people on here, I am talking about in general/overall. Maybe it is just not having learned the whole social game thing. I don't know.

I didn't quite go to college right after high school.thats a whole nother story...