I have Oneitis, again

[loveorlust]

This time I'm the loser

Any course of action to rid myself of this dreaded disease and still win the girl even though I've already been placed in the friend zone by her?

sh@t!

 

[Serg897]

Sucks doesn't it? Cut her off right now and start over. You know deep down that this isnt going to work out with your current mindset, and that she already kicked you to the curb. Dont look back.

 

[MisterD]

No contact bro. That's all you can do for now. And then determine if this "friendship" is a legit one where you hang out, she serves as a wing woman, and she introduces you to her girlfriends, or if its a polite rejection where she flakes when you ask her out, and only uses you to feed her ego. If its a legit healthy relationship, don't next her. If it's a dead end, next her.

Question regarding the friend zone. What's the best way to handle it? When the girl throws the friend card at me I typically say "haha, oh ok", and go no contact/eventually next her, but i'm considering saying something along the lines of "haha thanks for the heads up but i dont do the friend zone thing" and see what her reaction is. A polite rejection on my end that conveys I don't care but I'm also not gonna be her male girlfriend. Does that come across bitter or trying too hard? Should I just stick with a chuckle and a NC? How do you guys typically handle it. And keep in mind i'm not asking how to win her back as I believe once the friend card is used I'm no longer going to expend energy on her, even if there is a slim chance to turn it around. I basically just want a way to turn down her friendship offer without looking upset

 

[Chickfight]

Question regarding the friend zone. What's the best way to handle it? When the girl throws the friend card at me I typically say "haha, oh ok", and go no contact/eventually next her, but i'm considering saying something along the lines of "haha thanks for the heads up but i dont do the friend zone thing" and see what her reaction is. A polite rejection on my end that conveys I don't care but I'm also not gonna be her male girlfriend. Does that come across bitter or trying too hard? Should I just stick with a chuckle and a NC? How do you guys typically handle it. And keep in mind i'm not asking how to win her back as I believe once the friend card is used I'm no longer going to expend energy on her, even if there is a slim chance to turn it around. I basically just want a way to turn down her friendship offer without looking upset

If you do everything right, then you wouldn't get friendzoned. Everyone makes mistakes though and if it does happen, I'd be honest and polite and NOT desperate. Smile say "I think you're cool, but I'm not interested in being your friend". If she replies with something like "Well I guess we can't see eachother anymore then." I'd reply with "That's up to you". If she's still not digging it after that, it's a lost cause.

 

[DonJuanit0]

Question regarding the friend zone. What's the best way to handle it? When the girl throws the friend card at me I typically say "haha, oh ok", and go no contact/eventually next her, but i'm considering saying something along the lines of "haha thanks for the heads up but i dont do the friend zone thing" and see what her reaction is. A polite rejection on my end that conveys I don't care but I'm also not gonna be her male girlfriend. Does that come across bitter or trying too hard? Should I just stick with a chuckle and a NC? How do you guys typically handle it. And keep in mind i'm not asking how to win her back as I believe once the friend card is used I'm no longer going to expend energy on her, even if there is a slim chance to turn it around. I basically just want a way to turn down her friendship offer without looking upset

I simply make my self clear that I don't believe in friendship between a man and a woman! "Nature didn't make us to be friends I'm sorry" that's my words! She might ask, then what are we? I've answered "we're just two people who like each other but for some strange reasons we do nothing about it"
if she says that she doesn't like you, you just say that you do and the case is closed! I have no women friends, just women that hang around with me and my male friends!

 

[MisterD]

If you do everything right, then you wouldn't get friendzoned. Everyone makes mistakes though and if it does happen, I'd be honest and polite and NOT desperate. Smile say "I think you're cool, but I'm not interested in being your friend". If she replies with something like "Well I guess we can't see eachother anymore then." I'd reply with "That's up to you". If she's still not digging it after that, it's a lost cause.

I agree about if you do it right it wouldn't happen, but sometimes it's about not having attraction. The few times it has happened, it wasnt a matter of me waiting years to ask a girl out and shes already comfortable with me being her bff. It was me approaching a girl, landing her number, and then as soon as i escalate she says well im just hoping we can be friends; aka i didnt know how to turn you down when i gave you my number, so im turning you down now. At which point I move on. Its not one of those things were i worship a chick for a few months/years, then one day profess my love for her and she rejects me. It's a new chick, as soon I get the number and escalate they try to use the friend zone card.