I have no idea what just happened. Need help

[The_Reaper]

I just spend the past hour talking online to my long-distance GF (we're apart for a few months but were never really "exclusive" though as far as i know she was not with other people), and it's official - she likes some guy and he likes her (except he's got a GF blah blah). well fukk her. I don't want to put myself through that ****, so I told her I don't want her in my life - I want to cut her free.

She got extremely upset. And over a long conversation I melted, like a *****, and said maybe I made a mistake.

Then I found out that she likes other guys by her very nature, she likes "a lot of people" but still stays friends with them. Fukk that! it makes me think she is a user. We got into an arguement and she said not to bother contacting her. the time we spent talking went so fast it was like a weird dream.

I used to have oneitus for this *****, I still do, but i hate her guts right now. What should I do? drop her?

 

[blinkwatt]

Haha,"Dropping a one-itis" is easier said then done. Just learn from this expierence and move on with your life.

 

[PRMoon]

You could NEXT her but since she's an LDR I'd say that should come with the territory. LDR's take alot of time and alot of effort. Not saying I'm not for them if you can manage it but in my opinion our time on this planet is far to limited to be waiting on something or someone that has a good chance of not being there when you want it to be.

Moving on, I think you should drop the exclusivity clause on your relationship. I say this as opposed to breaking up with her altogether for a rew reasons. First if you tell her you both have a pretty good relationship and you want to remain on good terms with her at least but the strain of exsclutivity is a little unfair, you appear to be honest and she should respect that if indeed you two were really all that good together. Second it frees up YOUR time to see other people and other girls love to hear about your previous relationships (some comparison ego BS) and if you come off as sweet and thus creating attraction. Finally, if you don't call the relationship off and leave it as open, you'll stand a pretty good chance of having sex with her again when your paths cross again.

 

[Hitman10000]

Kick that Attention H0 to the curb.

 

[Cableguy]

I feel for you bro. But you have to ask yourself, can you trust this chick? I mean, if by her nature she likes other dudes then it's only a matter of time before she really rips your heart out. Cut ALL contact with this girl like right now. It's only going to hurt worse if you drag this out. Hope it works out for you dog.

 

[The_Reaper]

Thanks for the advice. Let me just say that these forums are the only place where i expose such insecurities, when i'm with her i'm not emotional or needy, i don't let her see these thoughts. It's so very, very hard to cut contact with a girl I love so damn much, even if she is a devious manipulating untrustworthy *****. Sometimes I hate her so much, but hate is not the opposite of love, it's indifference. I have a photo of her and every time i look at it i just want to fcking die, i hate these wussy emotions, they're so unwelcome. I wish i could erase her from my mind. I've been with her nearly a year. ****

 

[redd]

Thanks for the advice. Let me just say that these forums are the only place where i expose such insecurities, when i'm with her i'm not emotional or needy, i don't let her see these thoughts. It's so very, very hard to cut contact with a girl I love so damn much, even if she is a devious manipulating untrustworthy *****. Sometimes I hate her so much, but hate is not the opposite of love, it's indifference. I have a photo of her and every time i look at it i just want to fcking die, i hate these wussy emotions, they're so unwelcome. I wish i could erase her from my mind. I've been with her nearly a year. ****

Yeah sucks doesnt it that feeling but best thing u could do right now is to start concentrating on YOUR LIFE! .

 

[The_Reaper]

I want to say one more thing, please read:

Please read this post here, it is very important:
The very important elements that is perhaps missing from my original post is this: the line between "girlfriend/boyfriend" and "friendship" is very blurred in our case. I cannot stress that enough. We have always been friends, always stayed in touch, have personal connections and know secrets of each other and share something great. It was a special thing, we were talking every day, it got deep. I was with other women while with her, and she was with other guys, and we were happy to have this kind of relationship. That bit is complicated and hard to explain. But things have changed recently. She said she feels more, she wants more - and this was happening just before I had to leave and go abroad. Now i realise i want her, i love her, i akways have but now it has reached a kind of pinacle. I am getting involved with a girl here, and I was torn between saying goodbye to the other girl, because talking to her every day is going to slowly and insidiously damage me.