"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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I have hit a plateau, please advise

DJSilver

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I need suggestions from experts on what I might be doing wrong.

In the last few years I have improved myself significantly but I still dont have a girlfriend. I have tried everything - reading online websites such as sosuave, reading david deangelo's material and tons of other things out there. I consider myself to be average looking. Few women in the past have called me "cute" and "so good looking", so I dont think looks is the problem. Atleast I am not hideous. The pattern seems to be that girls whom I dont find attractive find me attractive. The girls that I find good looking are almost always (a) either hooked up (b) show little interest in me.

In the past I used to be really shy, but I have improved myself tremendously. I have greatly improved my social skills. I dress well, talk well, make good money. I have lots of friends. I am really confortable talking to strangers. I am usually good at conversations/talking funny/flirting etc. I participate in tons of interesting activities. I goto lot of parties, meet lot of new people, do tons of exciting and new things. I think I have everything going for me in terms of all the things that people usually advise DJs just starting to improve. Friends and co workers find it impossible to believe that I am not dating anyone. I am just telling the general perception that people have because I come across as an exceptional guy in lot of things. But the reality is different and the girls are turning me down left and right. Especially the girls that I am interested in. I have improved my game, so I am able to get their numbers/emails 80% of the time. But they almost never result in any dates.

At this point my inner game is quite strong so I dont really care whether girls reject me or accept me. I have long back stopped women define my happiness or sense of esteem. However, I am very confused as to why this is happening. Am I just plain unlucky? Or are the girls I find attractive out of my league (if there is such a thing).

The pattern has become so predictable and frustating. Everytime I meet a girl that I am interested in, she doesnt show interest at all. If I get the number or email, it doesnt lead to anything more. They dont return calls or reply back. Everytime I meet girls that I dont find attractive, they find me attractive. But I dont want to date them.

I thought that maybe when I come across girls that I find attractive, I subconciously act wussy, show neediness and all the AFC stuff, but I dont think that is what happens. I have observed myself in such situations and even asked my friends to give me feedback. My level of game is usually the same. For some reason, I NEVER can get further.

I feel I have hit a plateau. I am starting to believe, unfortunately, that maybe there is some truth about some girls being out of your league. Should I just compromise and date girls that I dont find attractive and dont make me happy? I hope there is another answer out there.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Cod3r

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Some might flame me, but IMO there are definite leagues... You might can go up 1 point on the looks/status/race/ect... scale through personality and game, but that's about it...


-Cod3r
 

toom

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Hm...this seems like a way of structuring something that can't be so easily defined, but maybe you have the 'idea' of a girl that you want to date, or don't want to date, but emotionally you find it hard to commit. I personally always have a grand notion of having this or that gilr as a girlfriend, but when it comes to knowing how I feel, epecially when the right girl comes along I often fall short. Not accusing you of any serious commitment issues mind lol. Maybe people just feel in different ways.
 
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