That's something to get over right, cause otherwise, i ain't relationship material? I realize, I have had that problem if I just had a gf, like everyone else, all would be good. That's just a part of a bigger thing.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I have always felt alone and not happy...
- Thread starter ItsOnNow
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
You need to stop posting about how you feel. Go out and do something.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Interesting vids:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuGUmI3TpPk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuGUmI3TpPk
what do I want? An out of this mental hell and getting what I want in life, and attracting and getting women the right and honest way, and to find the balls to do it. I cannot get over this feeling of being behind everyone else, like everyone else started,tried,failed, succeeded sooner than me.
I mean seriously, look at me. Here I am lamenting my problems rather than having fixed them. I am losing it. My comfort zone is here, at home, either on the computer or drinking to take my mind off of things.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuGUmI3TpPk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuGUmI3TpPk
what do I want? An out of this mental hell and getting what I want in life, and attracting and getting women the right and honest way, and to find the balls to do it. I cannot get over this feeling of being behind everyone else, like everyone else started,tried,failed, succeeded sooner than me.
I mean seriously, look at me. Here I am lamenting my problems rather than having fixed them. I am losing it. My comfort zone is here, at home, either on the computer or drinking to take my mind off of things.
I would rip you a new one. but your a bit too pathetic for that. Stop posting for a week and go do something. Make a plan and see it thru. Come back and post the results. If you can't do this at the very least stop posting crap.
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
Troll
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzyuhT9kCIo&feature=related
Damn its depressing, if you feel this way then do something about it instead of complaining like a vagina.
Only you can help yourself.
Damn its depressing, if you feel this way then do something about it instead of complaining like a vagina.
Only you can help yourself.
That's too hard to do for some people. It's easier to feel sorry for ourselves and have people pity us and tell us it can't be done. People on here don't want to work for anything, they want things handed to them since they feel they deserve it and are entitled.Warrior74 said:
Go get an education? Too hard
Go meet people? Too hard
Go join clubs? Too hard
Go join sports? Too hard
Go make money and be rich? Too hard
Go ask girls out? Too hard
Sit at home, eat chips, watch downloaded movies and porn and hope a model comes knocking on our door to give us free sex? EASY!
ItsOnNow, if you start one more thread like this, some people will likely tell you where to go.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
The truth is that fixing stuff like this is SIMPLE! Yeah, it's very very simple!! You may not like the solution, you may not believe it, but it's your way out:
I know this is hard for someone who doesn't have motivation, but it's easy. Go out and do some exercise!
Inactivity = Depression.
If you can't handle the truth... Remember it's prooved! You release hormones that make you feel better, you get a better body and feel better about yourself, raise some Testosterone, then girls will follow, etc. etc. You'll feel 1000 times better!
Stay one week away from your computer I guarantee you that it will do wonders and you'll laugh at these threads later.
But I have to tell you... I'm not really motivated to give advice to someone who behaves like this! I LOVE to help people with energy, with the mindset "Okay I' m gonna work out outside until my muscles hurt and my breath runs out !" and no one is really willing to help someone (And you've made other threads!) who is "daaamn, this is sooo bad, i'm really unhappy." *eats pizza*.
If there's a problem, fix it, don't complain! Good luck!
I know this is hard for someone who doesn't have motivation, but it's easy. Go out and do some exercise!
Inactivity = Depression.
If you can't handle the truth... Remember it's prooved! You release hormones that make you feel better, you get a better body and feel better about yourself, raise some Testosterone, then girls will follow, etc. etc. You'll feel 1000 times better!
Stay one week away from your computer I guarantee you that it will do wonders and you'll laugh at these threads later.
But I have to tell you... I'm not really motivated to give advice to someone who behaves like this! I LOVE to help people with energy, with the mindset "Okay I' m gonna work out outside until my muscles hurt and my breath runs out !" and no one is really willing to help someone (And you've made other threads!) who is "daaamn, this is sooo bad, i'm really unhappy." *eats pizza*.
If there's a problem, fix it, don't complain! Good luck!
To the OP,
If you really can't accept the way your life is right now, the only thing you can do is change it. You are the only person who cares enough about you to help you change it. Self help is the best help bar none....you probably just have to get out of the house more, if you really can't bear your own company you need to get your extroverted arse out of the house and feed off of other peoples energy.
If you don't really care about doing this, then you are comfortable with your current situation and need to quit *****ing about it and just enjoy what you have....good luck man.
If you really can't accept the way your life is right now, the only thing you can do is change it. You are the only person who cares enough about you to help you change it. Self help is the best help bar none....you probably just have to get out of the house more, if you really can't bear your own company you need to get your extroverted arse out of the house and feed off of other peoples energy.
If you don't really care about doing this, then you are comfortable with your current situation and need to quit *****ing about it and just enjoy what you have....good luck man.
It's all true, what you're saying, the inactivity, the getting out, doing things, meeting people, meeting girls, that's been a big one for me, it's all easier said than done for me. It may be fear of judgement or rejection. Why? I don't know. I don't know what it comes from, but it's killing me. There has been times when I have gotten so drunk to kill the anxiety in me, both at home and being out. Sometimes I go out just to be around other people, stores, restauraunts, walking around, etc. But it's like there's no connection anyways.
This is killing me. I don't like this. I haven't liked this for a long time. It's always in the negative, I can't shut it off. I know, I should be out, approaching, meeting, not taking things too personally, which is something I try not too. I have found myself giving information which I don't apply to myself. I haven't even tried to aquire the skills to do so, this is what bugs me the most.I am not comfortable, yet I am too much into my own zone, and so much time has passed while everyone has been living, I have been feeling miserable.
It is also this feeling of being behind/not good enough. For many reasons. It's all these other things too like "If you don't use, you lose it." Or if you can't attract a woman,by definition, you are sterile. I am so clueless, I don't even know the right signs, how to read them, and there is a wealth of information out there, some I have applied, sometimes, I give advice to people w/o applying it to myself.
This is killing me. I don't like this. I haven't liked this for a long time. It's always in the negative, I can't shut it off. I know, I should be out, approaching, meeting, not taking things too personally, which is something I try not too. I have found myself giving information which I don't apply to myself. I haven't even tried to aquire the skills to do so, this is what bugs me the most.I am not comfortable, yet I am too much into my own zone, and so much time has passed while everyone has been living, I have been feeling miserable.
It is also this feeling of being behind/not good enough. For many reasons. It's all these other things too like "If you don't use, you lose it." Or if you can't attract a woman,by definition, you are sterile. I am so clueless, I don't even know the right signs, how to read them, and there is a wealth of information out there, some I have applied, sometimes, I give advice to people w/o applying it to myself.
Mr_rogers
Senior Don Juan
You know man, I feel very much the same way that you do and I have to really struggle to get away from the computer and to deal with my anxiety issues. The biggest difference between you and I is that I'm at least trying. If you gave it an honest to god 100% effort for even a single day, the chances of you making some sort of headway are huge. If however, even the day-to-day things seem insurmountable, you may have a genuine anxiety disorder or some sort of clinical depression. If that's the case, do yourself a favor and get some professional help.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
DonGorgon
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2007
- Messages
- 4,679
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- 102
You guys can thank capitalism for all this social depression and desperation.. Expect this to get alot worse too..
Have you tried exercise and meditation? I know when I get in a spiral of negative thinking these things help out. Try doing push ups and crunches in the morning and doing 5 to 10 minutes of positive affirmations. Just start out small and work your way up to more exercise and longer meditation. It might feel silly at first but if you can stick to it for a solid month you will see some improvements in your outlook.
If you add that to taking action (going out and talking to people, meeting girls) you will see some improvement.
Also cover the basics.
Everyday:
-exercise and meditate apon waking.
-make a list of goals for the day that you can and will achieve
-dress to impress, groom yourself well. Always look your best.
-make eye contact with everyone you talk to. (don't stare, but don't avoid)
-make yourself smile. Even if it feels weird. If you do it long enuff you will feel your mood brighten.
-push yourself out of your comfort zone. Try something different or do something that scares you.
-try to focus your thoughts on right now. This moment in time. If you find yourself dwelling on the past, cut that thought. If you find yourself worrying about the future, cut that thought. How? Focus on what is happening right now. Focus on your body, your breathing, focus on what is around you. See the colors, the shapes, the people, the things. Bring your mind to the present. Then do some affirmations and then move forward with what you were doing. Eventually it will become second nature and you will learn to live more in the moment.
-Get off the computer! ( work on the computer 12-15 hours a day, I need to take my own advice on this one!)
If you add that to taking action (going out and talking to people, meeting girls) you will see some improvement.
Also cover the basics.
Everyday:
-exercise and meditate apon waking.
-make a list of goals for the day that you can and will achieve
-dress to impress, groom yourself well. Always look your best.
-make eye contact with everyone you talk to. (don't stare, but don't avoid)
-make yourself smile. Even if it feels weird. If you do it long enuff you will feel your mood brighten.
-push yourself out of your comfort zone. Try something different or do something that scares you.
-try to focus your thoughts on right now. This moment in time. If you find yourself dwelling on the past, cut that thought. If you find yourself worrying about the future, cut that thought. How? Focus on what is happening right now. Focus on your body, your breathing, focus on what is around you. See the colors, the shapes, the people, the things. Bring your mind to the present. Then do some affirmations and then move forward with what you were doing. Eventually it will become second nature and you will learn to live more in the moment.
-Get off the computer! ( work on the computer 12-15 hours a day, I need to take my own advice on this one!)
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.