"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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I got a little scare today (and what could it mean)?

The Comeback Kid

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As a prelude, first, here is the other thread regarding this girl: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=86033

You should read that thread first, as some of the things mentioned are hard to briefly explain. It's not terribly long, but it is informative.

There is this girl that I like (read the other thread to understand what's up) and we have our HC Dance Saturday. A lot of people at my school go with friends and not necessarily "dates". But I told myself if the situation and hte timing were right, I was going to ask her to Homecoming.

So, after lunch, I enter the class that I share with her. There are 4 of us that talk in the class - me, her and these two other guys that I also know. One of those two guys weren't there - we'll call the guy that was there "B". Anyway, I was showing my HC ticket to them, because I was going to ask her if she did have a date. So, asking if she had a date sounded smooth and she decided it was time to trick me. First, her and that guy friend ("B") pretend they're talking about something and she says...

"yeah, I'm going with "B", and they're both smiling at me. I hid my frustration and said that was cool. A couple seconds later, she says "TCK, I'm only kidding lol" and I was relieved (yes, the guy friend was just playing along). She actually is just going alone/with friends and said that she's not going to go to HC with a date at all. Also, she's not a girl that really plays games or would act immature to reject someone or anything like that.

So what's up with that? Could I have possibly accidently given a "tell" that I liked her (I never said a word about it, but maybe the way I said something or body language could have given it away)? Does she like me and was just trying to make me react? I don't know what it could mean - do you?

P.S. Overanalyzation of the day - "B" and I were wearing a sports cap of the same team. She quickly realized we were wearing caps of the same team (I always wear one, he doesn' too often) and she said she liked mine better. Doesn't mean anything, but it's just something else that happened today.
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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The Comeback Kid

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ALMOST 50 VIEWS and no replies (my bump doesn't count)? I really need some help interpreting what this could be and where I stand in general (in this situation).
 

The Comeback Kid

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HELP???

I really need some help on this ASAP. My dance is Saturday and I think I can do well (if her other guy friend is back in school tomorrow, I'll try to get him to remind the girl and I about our little "dance" at HC). But I need to hear what you think about this situation first.
 

kegger

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Try to chat more with her alone, kino, and just say some thing like "I am going to homecoming, want to come along with me" simple enough and you may have a date. Can't hurt anything.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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The Comeback Kid

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Originally posted by kegger
Try to chat more with her alone, kino, and just say some thing like "I am going to homecoming, want to come along with me" simple enough and you may have a date. Can't hurt anything.
I like the approach, but I think she plans to go to hte dance w/o a date and take it from there. If she wanted a date, she woulda had one already...long ago too. What I will do (as I posted above) is try to remind that guy friend that the girl and I are having a dance together - if he says that, I'm in for sure.

On a side note, with heels, she'll look 3 inches taller than me lol (we're both 5'6"). :eek:

The top situation though (with her testing my reaction) caught me off guard, but I have no clue what it may mean. She got me good on that one.
 

kegger

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Also remember that girls do not always say what they mean. It don't really matter how you do it, just ask her to go with you, all that could happen is that you fail. I know were you are coming from though, I am in about the same boat right now and I wish there was someone like me to help myself sometimes.
 

SynapsyS

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Lame.

Try this instead:

You - "I'm looking for a date for HC. You've impressed me over [time], so you can come with me :)"

Her - "Sorry, I don't want to go with a date."

You - "Oh come on, HC just isn't anywhere NEAR as fun without a date. You'll regret it if you say no ;)"

Her - "Hmm, ok then, you've sold me! :)"

Don't ask her. Tell her. And don't give her the the chance to reject you in such an obvious and easy way.

Good luck.
 

B-Lemond

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Damn TCK, 5'6"?! I'm 6'1", 6'2".

About the girl, it's obvious she likes you.

If you really want to go with her then let her know that you need a ride. When you guys arrive together, because she gave you a ride, it'll look like she is your date. Other guys will probably stay away from her because they think that she is taken. You'll look like your together but without you actually having to risk rejection and you'll save gas.

On a side note, TCK you need to stop this one-itis thing. It happens with every girl you talk about.

My advice about the dance would be to get the ride and dance with other girls. Open your eyes. Don't put all your hopes on one girl. Don't even think about her. Think about having FUN and if she wants to get in on that FUN then she'll approach you. Otherwise it's her loss.

Our homecoming dance is tonight as well. I'm not going with anyone. I'm just going to have a GREAT TIME.

JUST GO AND HAVE FUN!
 

The Comeback Kid

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Yes Bluelemond, I am only 5'6". I'm supposed to eventually grow to about 5'10" (doctor said I stop growing at 23-24), but when my mom is 5'2" and my dad is 5'11", just how tall am I going to get lol?

I can only hope she likes me. As I've probably mentioned before, I get all these signs and it ends up being that there is no chance in h*ll they'd go out with me. It's happened several times already, so I don't really know what to believe anymore. I try my best, but it's tough - what's happened in the past has remained constant every time, and it's a little tough to get rid of.

I really think she is going w/o a date. Plus, I'm driving to the dance, and I gotta pick up a friend cuz he has no car. Anyway, I didn't plan on asking a date to the dance. The Captain of the football team (gets a sh*tload of chicks) gwho I'm friends with told me he's not going with a date because he wants to see and talk to more people. I think he has a point.

As for one-itis, this one isn't so bad. There are a bunch of other girls I know now. I do prefer a relationship over a ONS though. I "like" one chick but I can hang out at the dance with other chicks as well (I think...). We'll see.

Thanks for the encouragement and good luck at your dance as well. Last year's dance was a living nightmare (more in P.S.), so hopefully things go better this year.

P.S. As I mentioned, last year's dance was HORRIBLE for me:
-Let's say I was talking with three other friends. Three hot girls would come up to us and yank the other three away so they can dance. Now imagine this happening more than once.
:down: :down:
-I was sooo nervous. I couldn't move (almost). It was my firstbig school dance I went to, and I was petrified. Especially when I saw girls coming up to two of my friends and talking to them and just kinda ignoring me totally.
-I can't dance, period. At least this time, I've read up on some stuff though. This may be my main fear of the HC Dance though.
-There was probably more, but I can't remember everything right now (like how I was HC Prince and the Princess was too drunk to dance).

We'll see what happens. Obviously, last year's dance has stung in my head. It was also an inspiration, as I have been improving myself from that moment on, vowing never to let something that bad happen again. Hopefully, I'm right.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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The Comeback Kid

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Got back from HC.

I think this was the worst HC ever...NOTHING HAPPENED. There really weren't many people dancing, I said hey to a few girls (some hotties kissed me on the cheek), but I could hardly find that girl I like (said hi to her once).

So not many people danced (just some girls and couples/bf-gf) and there were NO parties at all (in fact, there were hardly any cars on the road)...I cheched with the football captain and the other football player who was HC King - nothing.

The only downside was that there was a slow song, and I couldn't find the girl, where I was (some guy that knows us both tried desperately to find her, but cou;dn
t find her). I had to use some girl my friend knew (HB 5-6 :down: ) and that was it - I don't even know her name lol.

Oh well - it wasn't much of a HC IMO. :(
 
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