"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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I FOUGHT IT. I didn't call...and she didn't call me.

montybrown

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So today I had to fight it VERY hard to NOT call this girl up. I wanted to call her so bad because I want to talk to her. But I know that if I didn't call she won't call me and tonight proves it. Any ideas if this is a sign of not being interested or what? Should I just move on? I was thinking to myself "What if this girl is WAITING for me to call? and is afraid to call me?" But then I was thinking, I always fvckin call her every night and she doesn't answer....but then calls me up later. Now this time, I just didn't call her up at all and she never did call at all. I'm just confused.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

iqqi

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montybrown said:
So today I had to fight it VERY hard to NOT call this girl up. I wanted to call her so bad because I want to talk to her. But I know that if I didn't call she won't call me and tonight proves it. Any ideas if this is a sign of not being interested or what? Should I just move on? I was thinking to myself "What if this girl is WAITING for me to call? and is afraid to call me?" But then I was thinking, I always fvckin call her every night and she doesn't answer....but then calls me up later. Now this time, I just didn't call her up at all and she never did call at all. I'm just confused.
Wait three days.

This will make her wonder, and I bet she'll miss you.

Who is this chick to you, and why are you calling her EVERY NIGHT???
 

Nexxus

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maybe she actually wasn't there when you called and just wanted to call u back for good manners...

just wait 3 days befor you call, n quit bein so confused...
 

Obsidian

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Read the Book of Pook, chump. Games and silly strategies are not the answer to your life's problems; your mindset is all wrong.
 

Monkey

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It doesn't matter how badly you want to talk to her, it only matters how badly SHE wants to talk to YOU.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bigdavis

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Don't call! Wait it out. There are only two things that can happen.

Either she wasn't into you and now she's relieved that you quit calling. In which case it's over, move on.

Or she's sitting at home driving herself nutts wondering why you aren't calling and she WILL attempt to make some contact with you, be it a text message, phone call, myspace, email, or whatever. And then she's Yours!
 

Sandow

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Not Calling Is Good, Just Make Sure It's Not Too Long.
 

frisco

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Use this ratio

For every two calls from her you call her once and when you call her make sure you have something interesting and unique to say make her feel good while on the phone then dont call her till she calls twice simple
 

Kidquick

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montybrown said:
I'm just confused.
It sounds to me like her interest level is mediocre at best, because if she's into you she wouldn't be confusing you. It might be time to focus you attention elsewhere.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Obsidian said:
Read the Book of Pook, chump. Games and silly strategies are not the answer to your life's problems; your mindset is all wrong.
Thank you!
 

iqqi

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Kidquick said:
It sounds to me like her interest level is mediocre at best, because if she's into you she wouldn't be confusing you. It might be time to focus you attention elsewhere.
This is not true, some women are just plain confusing. I know I can be.
 

Desdinova

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For a moment there, I thought you were trying to avoid calling an ex.

I had to learn the hard way that I was much better off striking while the iron is hot. You're better off calling the next day instead of doing the wait, ESPECIALLY after meeting a woman for the first time. As long as you don't go overboard with calling her, you'll be fine.

If she doesn't answer, leave a message. If there's no voicemail, call the next day. If you get no response in a week, ditch her number.

I find women are typically horrible at initiating most things when they're dating a new guy. That's why you have to phone her, you have to pick the day, you have to pick the activity, and you have to set the pace of progression in the "relationship".
 

iqqi

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If I am really interested in a guy who got my #, and he calls the next day, it is GREAT.

For those of you who do want to play mind games though, call her the very next day, come on strong, THEN wait 3-5 days to call.

THAT sh!t drives me nuts.
 
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