I feel I messed up, now what?

[Onion]

After my BPD nightmare, I am dating a new girl (HB7) on LDR. We went out on a couple of dates (amazing sex on the second date) and her IL is really high.

I am learning my lessons from you lot and thank you, that she's blowing up my phone with calls, txts and lots of pics etc while i am staying cool, not texting much and being unavailable. It is really paying off.

Problem is i didn't think this would go any further than a few dates and haven't told her that i have a son. I want to turn this to LTR. How do i proceed?

 

[bigneil]

If there is one thing that seems universal, it's that single moms who are interested will almost immediately disclose the number of children they have. Apparently, keeping it secret backfired on them so much that it was ruled out as an option for them. Men should probably do the same thing. Don't reveal it as a liability. Just mention your son in a sentence, etc.

 

[Onion]

Beingneil, thing is she asked if I had any and I said i had six in a joking way but she now assumes I dont have kids. How do I get out from this without losing her?

 

[MOTU]

Onion you need to come clean on this. Like Niel said, mention your son casually. If she says "why didn't you tell me sooner" say something like "I I am very protective of my son and I had to make sure that you weren't psycho or something" and then laugh. Think through her possible responses and be prepared to counter them. If she makes a big deal out of it turn it around on her "wow you don't seem like the kind of person who dislikes kids" or something. Rehearse it so it comes off naturally.

Whatever you do don't apologize or act like you did something wrong. Make it about looking out for your kid not about her.

 

[Onion]

MOTU that sounds good, thanks bruv. One thing though. would this be the kind of thing you'd expect women to hold it against you at some point in future? Considering i 'shoulda' told her about it on the first, maybe second date? certainly before i fvcked her?