I feel I have forgotten how to go out and have fun....

[CapedCrusader08]

Cause that's the point right? That's what this game is all about? the comfort building,the confidence,the energy,etc. I barely even go out,except for work or school,time off is spent trying to escape this. I am so stuck in my head,that I have allowed to take over and let time go by. I need some help,I need a magic pill,a quick fix it seems. I have become a hater,one who feels they must drag others down to make themselves feel good.

 

[DarkShade]

As trite as it sounds, a few beers gets me in a good mood. It helps to release inhibitions and leave your mind for a little while. I have a book I picked up at a bookstore called "Get out of your Mind and onto your Life", it's a little workbook that helps you release.

Basically what it says is this: In the world of tug of war, what do you do? You tug on that rope as long as you can, whether you win or lose. What if you just dropped the rope, stopped the struggle? Can someone really make you pick up that rope and pull on it? Only YOU can decide that. You can relate this to all aspects of life. It parallels the age old idea of "If two countries declared war and no one showed up to fight, what would happen?"

 

[Solomon]

Cause that's the point right? That's what this game is all about? the comfort building,the confidence,the energy,etc. I barely even go out,except for work or school,time off is spent trying to escape this. I am so stuck in my head,that I have allowed to take over and let time go by. I need some help,I need a magic pill,a quick fix it seems. I have become a hater,one who feels they must drag others down to make themselves feel good.

Dude I feel u man I so feel u
I work 64 hours a week, when I do get time to sarge its on a frigging Tuesday or Wednesday some crappy ass day, and the chicks are usually average or less, and its uuugh, but I go out you know why? because I wanna improve, I wanna do better, I want whats on top and not the bottom you know? right now I'm busting my ass in all aspects of my life from work to the field and its the journey which makes this so fulfilling you can't just start on top you gotta work your way there

peace

solo

 

[Asteconn]

Watch lots of comedy, or search yutube for 'fail', that's one of my favourites

 

[CapedCrusader08]

You're right. I have dropped the rope so to speak. It seems my problem has been,I am not the ******* that gets the hot chicks,or even the regular guy who gets average looking chicks. I mean,ams I just so sullen and depressed,people can pick up on this a mile away? Esp women. I feel I have some sort of identity crisis,or a masculine identity crisis,and I find myself blaiming and being angry at the world and women. It's like I have been waiting for this life changing event,like school,to happen,and yet I am still in this constant state. Ever seen the movie rodger dodger? Something like that.

I mean,I read two schools of thought on this website,charm/seduce em,bang em,leave em,not exactly what I want. Or,yeah,being a father/provider is a great thing,but women are so lacking in faithfulness,and are such manipulative sluts,it's not even worth it. I can't even seem to find a sensible balance. I mean, I feel like I am miles ahead,in terms of certain knowledge,but have actually very little in field,real life experience. As in I can read the baseball stats,but can't step up to the plate and hit the home run. I feel I have not even been in any sort of prime of life,and that could be due to many factors,I have never felt "hot" or "super attractive" like most guys. Could be when I am older I hit that stage,but I feel like that is what I have always wanted to be. I mean, I feel I have been in this constant slump,dry spell even,where I can't take control and make things happen for me.

I am also concerned I am somewhat emotionally crippled,or stunted even,thus causing this paranoid fear of intimcacy. Something that who knows what it's caused by. It could be this sense of feeling utterly isolated from things and people. I mean seriously,it feels like this sense of shyness and awkwardness,and not being the amog. I also try to avoid desperatley looking for validation,although I wonder if people can sense it. I am not the cool,easygoing guy I want to be. Instead, I am this worrisome,self pitying guy who can't get over his own past,let alone his own emotional grievances.

 

[Jaggs]

Yes that is exactly who you are, or have been in the past.

Stop making these PATHETIC whiny posts and go get some serious psychological help if you really think you are THAT bad. Go see a doctor.

You CAN change.

all your post are just whining about how you are not this and are not that. SO FVCKING WHAT?! try and become that! You will fall down, but you will get back even stronger.

Stop posting here. Its not helping at all. Burn your computer, go get some help, try as hard as you can to turn your life around. It can be done, and you will look back and go WHY WAS I SUCH A WHINY *****?!

I'm sorry but your attitude is just extremely aggravating. You just make post after post about how pathetic you think you are, as if its some permanent thing. Do you WANT To change? Stop thinking that who you are is just a sum of your past experiences.

Get off this website. Go live.

You shouldn't even think about trying to pick up woman or "sarge". Leave that for when you are slightly happier. It's going to do nothing but make you go backwards at the moment.

 

[DJVladdy]

He doesnt need a psychiatrist - he needs a good kick in the ass, like many of us here, me included.

One very important thing you mentioned, CC:
you feel like you need the magic pill.

That IS our problem. The problem is expecting something for nothing. Magic pill does not exist, contrary to my belief that amphetamine is exactly that. I'm kind of paying for that right now.

Magic pill/quick fix = bull****:

Pheromones
Get rich quick
hydroxycut
the "secret"
"Conquer your Campus"
adult friend finder

...the list goes on and on. what do they have in common? 2 things:
1. none of them work.
2. they all promise a magic pill, or a solution that only "the chosen few" have been allowed to know (except u can become "chosen" for 29.95 yea OKAY..)

 

[CapedCrusader08]

Well,I don't exactly see it as "a chosen few" sort of thing. Well,some parts. My problem seems to be a lifestyle thing. Plus others. It's 50 million things running through my head. Yeah. Not having put in enough work over the years. I would come home,isolate myself,as in spend alot of time moping about,hoping things would get better,beating myself up. Or maybe it's a personality thing,or not improving my looks,or maybe it's the way I see the world,see people. Or some warped sense of reality,brough on by I don't know what. It's some sort of emotional thing. Or,it is a lack,or maybe even fear,of sexuality. You talk about the "don juan" being the guy who "oozes with sex appeal". Well,what's the difference between that and genuine love? Or the difference between two people involved with one another for a long time. Something I feel I have been lacking. Companionship,love,whatever you want to call it. Lack of attraction perhaps?

 

[mfd1830]

Who cares? Why do you keep trying to figure out the exact details of why you are the way you are? Did you go out today and try making eye contact with any girls? Do you have any goals and concrete plans to reach them? These are the things you should be doing and figuring out; else you're just gonna keep wasting more time on the internet and getting nowhere.

Non-action is the root of every single problem you have.

 

[DarkShade]

Dude you just need to get a few friends, a few drinks and let the night go where it takes you. Don't make it a point every time you go out to bring home some quality punani, your #1 concern when you enter your place of enjoyment is to do just that, enjoy yourself. If a girl catches your eye then give it a shot, otherwise you are there to have fun, not to chase tail. I'm stepping my game up night by night and I haven't brought anyone home yet, but it's only a matter of time.

 

[CapedCrusader08]

why do I keep trying to figure out the details? Closure I guess. Yes,I have always had goals,it's getting them that has been the hard part. Yeah. non-action. That's what kills me. As for freinds,idk,i;m shy,or have trust issues. or feel inferior or something.

 

[mfd1830]

The hurt only stops when you choose to forgive and move on. Odds are you were at least 50% responsible for all the ****ty things that happened to you; if for no other reason, you let them happen.

I'm thankful for the terrible high school life I had. Just as I'm thankful for all the stupid and awkward dates and interactions with girls I've had in my life. Everybody needs to hit the bottom if they want to reach the top. People that have no reason to assess their life and their place in the world have no opportunities for growth. They coast for the rest of their lives, thinking they're happy with their stable job and wife, never realizing that they're missing out on 99% of what life has to offer. These people are sad. They are a waste. When we were in high school, we called them bullies.

Nothing worth having comes easily.