Alright guys, first off today is my birthday so what I'm about to tell you could very well be because of that reason but I'm hoping its not. I'm currently a sophmore at college and last night all my friends went out for my birthday. We pregamed with these girls down the hall from us (we've known them for both years). Now this one girl, lets call her V, is gorgeous but always had a boyfriend until just recently. So we get to the bar like 30 mins after the girls and one of them come up to me and go hey V wants you go make something happen. Now I'm a shy kid so I don't really force anything whcih is my problem, but I eventually tried to make something happen. It ended up that we danced made out for a little and then I left because all my friends wanted to go. Now this girl is pretty much UNTOUCHABLE and I accomplished that much and so I got to thinking that this girl could possibly be a possible LTR for me but I want to play it perfectly so I don't EFFF IT UP! So since this is prertty much my 2nd time ever trying to go for the LTR I need some tips from you guys. What should my next move be?!
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I efff this up!
- Thread starter toddC
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
It's way too early to think in LTR terms, so scale down the long-term expectations. Don't run before you walk. Too many chumps make the mistake of asking a gal for a relationship, rather than setting a date, and the gal thinks "run away." Don't be one of those chumps.
It's hard to understand what went on, but if I understand you correctly, you made out and she was into it. If I read that correctly, and she wasn't just giving you "birthday attention," she'll probably be up for more. But looking beyond that at this point will do you no good.
Just continue to hang out with her, don't force anything, but go for it if the opportunity arises. You're pretty new to this, so just trust your instincts. I'm sure Mozart didn't compose a symphony the first time he sat down at a piano.
It's hard to understand what went on, but if I understand you correctly, you made out and she was into it. If I read that correctly, and she wasn't just giving you "birthday attention," she'll probably be up for more. But looking beyond that at this point will do you no good.
Just continue to hang out with her, don't force anything, but go for it if the opportunity arises. You're pretty new to this, so just trust your instincts. I'm sure Mozart didn't compose a symphony the first time he sat down at a piano.
i mean i completely disagree with you and i'm not even quite concerned with what you have to say. We weren't that drunk and she vocalized before we even started drinking that she wanted me. So thats first off. I just don't know when to text/call her or if you guys ever heard of facebook she wrote on my wall today so i dunno.
kdnash82
Master Don Juan
WOW!!! Everytime I think I've seen it all on this site, another guy surprises me.
I can't believe you did what you did. Some girl tells you to make a move, you escalate things which is good, then you leave with your friends? Did one of them tuck you in too? What were you thinking?
I'm sorry. Let me calm down. Basically what I wanna say is, instead of going home with your friends, you should have left with her before the night was even over with. It was obvious that she wanted you to do something with her. Live in the moment and stop thinking about long term.
I can't believe you did what you did. Some girl tells you to make a move, you escalate things which is good, then you leave with your friends? Did one of them tuck you in too? What were you thinking?
I'm sorry. Let me calm down. Basically what I wanna say is, instead of going home with your friends, you should have left with her before the night was even over with. It was obvious that she wanted you to do something with her. Live in the moment and stop thinking about long term.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
kdnash82
Master Don Juan
You're taking that saying WAYYYY too literally. For instance. If I was in a situation where my homeboy just broke up with his girlfriend, and that girl came by my house the very next day, got butt naked in my living room, got down on her knees and said, "I wanna suck your dikk". I wouldn't let her.
If it's my birthday and some chick tells me that her friend wants me to make something happen tonight, (if I did smoke weed) I would enjoy most of the night, take my weed and bounce with the girl. Trust me, they will understand.
If it's my birthday and some chick tells me that her friend wants me to make something happen tonight, (if I did smoke weed) I would enjoy most of the night, take my weed and bounce with the girl. Trust me, they will understand.