I DUMPED my GF!!! Was it correct? or did i overreacted?

[EvilSpirit22]

I dumped my girlfriend of 7 months yesterday because she gave her number to a guy on facebook and the guy was her facebook friend since a very long time. She gave her number and didn't told me.

I later on read her facebook inbox where the guy thanked her for the number. Although she has told the guy about me and he knows it. I have seen his texts and I would categorize him as an AFC. NO POTENTIAL THREAT.

Why i dumped her? She lied to me that she never gave him the number. I let it pass. The next day she didn't call me at all. When i did, She was rather cold and acted uninterested. So i hung up the phone and gave a silly excuse.

At night she was acting cold again so i showed disinterest and then she became normal. I said are you SORRY for what you did and she said No.

And we fought over the phone and i DUMPED her. She called me 5 times and i ignored the calls.

She unfriended me from facebook.

I haven't contacted her in last 24 hours. She hasn't done that either.

She disrespected me by giving the number to that guy and didn't apologise for it.

I implemented the NC.

I did a correct thing. Right??

 

[j.619]

If you've ready anything on this forum, you'd know that you did the right thing. Not only is it important, as a man, to set boundaries, but you MUST STICK TO THEM. That's what makes you a man. Being in control is what makes you a man. Control of your life, your emotions, and your boundaries. Don't let her convince you into moving that boundary. She'll be back, I'm sure, but only let her back on YOUR terms. Good luck!

 

[pyros]

if she gave him her number, and then denied it to you, you cannot trust her as you can see.

If you cannot trust your gf, you cant have a normal positive relationship with her. So whats the point in prolonging it?

Besides, you say that she was acting cold and distant, so I pressume she's planning on monkey branch, either cheating on you, or preparing the situation to dump you.

Either way she's not trustworthy so you're better off without her.

P.S.
Anyway, you could have asked her who the guy was, what he/she wanted and then you could have kept an eye on what she does, who she texts etc just to confirm she's about to cheat/dump you.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

Right now she's calling me. 8th call since i posted this. Should i pick it up? What to say?

 

[EvilSpirit22]

What if i want her back? But on my terms!

 

[pyros]

You know she lied.
You know she's talking to some dude whom she gave her number.
She acted distant and cold.

So she's not trustworthy and you see and sense something is up with this other dude...

what terms man? wtf?
so you wanna convince her that she should not talk to suspicious guys, she should not lie to you etc, right? LMAO.

You can pick up the phone and listen to her, but what do you think she's gonna say? --> Im sorry, Im sorry...Im sorry, I dont want to break up with you blah blah, this other dude is just a friend, he's just a friend...blah blah...

you get the idea right? Up to you man if you wanna keep dating a not so good girl.
A good girl and gf does not give her number to a FB 'friend' and lies about it

 

[In2theGame]

Actually, You did the right thing. If you had let that slide... she would know that she could manipulate you further. She's calling you a lot now because she knows she fvcked up.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

Well that guy stays in a different state.

 

[pyros]

Well that guy stays in a different state.

oh well, it does not matter then.

WTF??

if she's talking to a guy and hidding it from you, she's not into you and she's planning something bad for you.

 

[VikingKing]

She is going to cry, beg, and apologize. It's all just emotional manipulation. If you take her back she will just continue with the behavior, and/ or get revenge (aka dumping you).

She sounds like she is really immature. How old is she?

 

[EvilSpirit22]

Yeah! I didn't dumped her for giving the number. I know that this guy is not capable of getting her or any other girl. I am not the jealous type either. But you don't disrespect me and that's the reason. She told me that she talked to him and yup i saw the call log it was just over a minute.

But i believe i needed to put her back in her place so that she knows that i am not a normal dude.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

She is going to cry, beg, and apologize. It's all just emotional manipulation. If you take her back she will just continue with the behavior, and/ or get revenge (aka dumping you).

She sounds like she is really immature. How old is she?

18 turning 19 next week.Lost her virginity to me.

 

[pyros]

I think two things:
a) you think you control the relationship but Im not so sure.
b) considering what you wrote, she will cheat on you sooner or later.

she talked on the phone with the guy? WTF??

 

[EvilSpirit22]

oh well, it does not matter then.

WTF??

if she's talking to a guy and hidding it from you, she's not into you and she's planning something bad for you.

She said she knew i would get mad at her. But then why the fck she did it? That's my whole point. I switched off my phone now. Its 1.20 am here.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

I think two things:
a) you think you control the relationship but Im not so sure.
b) considering what you wrote, she will cheat on you sooner or later.

she talked on the phone with the guy? WTF??

Yesterday i said the exact same thing to her that you would definitely cheat on me. You are damn right bro. This emotional side of me ****s the alpha in me.

 

[pyros]

She said she knew i would get mad at her. But then why the fck she did it? That's my whole point. I switched off my phone now. Its 1.20 am here.

man, are you blind?? you ask why did she talk to the guy??? why do you think????

jeeeeeeeeeezzz....

P.S.
she did it eventhough she knew you would get mad. Nice.
See? she does not care abbout you, she cares about herself, and this is why she's talking to some other dude, and this is why she's planing something and hidding it from you. Open your eyes.

Be a man, understand that she¡s not trustworthy and selfish, and keep her just for secs if you can. Bye.

 

[wishyo]

lol, it looks like a massive overreaction to me. Come on man, you are motherfvcking man... Why the heck would u care about some stupid website and girl giving her number to someone... I might be very well wrong, just shared my opinion.

 

[Ruleit]

I agree with pyros.

She crossed the line, didn't apologize for it, didn't want to acknowledge her mistake. In her mind she is right and her hamster is rationalizing it as "who the hell does OP think he is trying to control ME!!!

You did the right thing by standing your ground and dumping her.

Once the trust is gone... it's fvcking GONE.

If you answer her calls and listen to her whining about her justifications for giving the number... and believe you me... she will come up with really GOOD reasons for doing it... totally believable ****.... e.g. "One of my friends from junior high overdosed last week and he's the only one who can tell me how she is doing. I didn't want to bother you about that drama, but I really needed to know if she was going to make it. blah. blah. blah"

If you want to entertain the thought of taking her back, make her work for it. Let her prove herself by knocking on your door with eyes filled with tears of regret for lying to you.

And when she does the above... put her on probation. Tell her you can't trust her, but are willing to start over. Meanwhile you start working on finding her replacement.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

I agree with pyros.

She crossed the line, didn't apologize for it, didn't want to acknowledge her mistake. In her mind she is right and her hamster is rationalizing it as "who the hell does OP think he is trying to control ME!!!

You did the right thing by standing your ground and dumping her.

Once the trust is gone... it's fvcking GONE.

If you answer her calls and listen to her whining about her justifications for giving the number... and believe you me... she will come up with really GOOD reasons for doing it... totally believable ****.... e.g. "One of my friends from junior high overdosed last week and he's the only one who can tell me how she is doing. I didn't want to bother you about that drama, but I really needed to know if she was going to make it. blah. blah. blah"

If you want to entertain the thought of taking her back, make her work for it. Let her prove herself by knocking on your door with eyes filled with tears of regret for lying to you.

And when she does the above... put her on probation. Tell her you can't trust her, but are willing to start over. Meanwhile you start working on finding her replacement.

Yeah i will take at least a week to get in touch with her and would FZ her Fck her one more time and that's it. Let her realize what she lost.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

lol, it looks like a massive overreaction to me. Come on man, you are motherfvcking man... Why the heck would u care about some stupid website and girl giving her number to someone... I might be very well wrong, just shared my opinion.

The alpha in me thinks the same. But if you have read the articles here, You don't allow a gal to disrespect you and if she does that you VANISH. Let her beg. If you go too easy on her she will do that again. Create a fear in her mind that you are not with her FOREVER.