“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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"I don't want to hurt you"

dtmssmfkdv

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Lifelong celibate here (I'm 25 and first kiss was just yesterday due to previously held religious views), been studying game past 2 years, lost 40 pounds, and recently quit my job and moved to Central America to hang out with Latinas fulltime. Anyways, I'm going to Spanish school where all the teachers are 18-25 ladies, and been flirting with the cute ones. I've been at the school many weeks now, and being that most folks studying foreign languages are nerds/introverts, and my Spanish is conversational, it's been easy to assert myself as the most interesting student there and build a social circle with all the teachers. We go out several times a week generally.

Been flirting with one girl in particular for several weeks, we always make strong eye contact and tease each other, and recently we started taking private dance lessons together just her and I, which I've been using to kino.

Anyways, yesterday I host a housewarming party to celebrate my new apartment, she gets fairly drunk, I lead her up to the balcony privately to isolate her, and she grabs me and starts making out with me. (She cheeked me when I tried to kiss her on the lips a couple days ago, I laughed, and told her "next time"). The party gets broken up by the landlord, and a few of us go back to her mom's house. Eventually it's just her and me left on her couch, we're cuddling and kino is escalating when her boyfriend calls. She's on top of me so I can hear everything, he starts *****ing her out for going out with other people, not spending enough time with him, and eventually he starts crying. She finally hangs up and says he's so jealous. I looked up his FB and he's liked her last 20 posts and he put 3 different pictures of flowers on her wall of VDay...

I try to kiss her again. She stops me, says, "I can't. I have to think. This is so complicated for me. I don't want to hurt you." I would go back to caressing her and eventually lift her chin so she'd be staring at my eyes, I'd lean in and try to kiss again, and she'd stop me with the same statement. This happened 5 times, then on number 6, we finally started making out again but not as long as back at my place. When she walked me out, she also kissed me on the lips again.

While we were talking, she kept asking me why I like her. "There's so many other cute girls at the school, and they all like you (she names 3 other girls who flirt regularly with me). Why'd you choose me? You could go out with them."

Is she just lacking self-confidence? I have social circle, other girls want me, her current boyfriend is a tool. Why's she afraid of hurting me? Is she just being reluctant, or is she still planning on friend-zoning me? Normally I don't want to hurt you is code for I'm going to dump you, but that doesn't seem to compute here. Am I playing my hand too fast or too slow, or just keep plowing on?
 

Thorninmyside

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Her part of the game is hers to own and figure out. I think you should just play this for what you want. Make her wonder what's going on in your head rather than you worry about hers. You have other options, but if you want this one, take it for what you can and if doors close, move on. It sounds to me like you were pretty close to a lay.
 

SAYNO

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I dont want to hurt you : "Im boinking someone else now, you are more emotionally invested in me than i am in you. Either that or i have vastly over rated myself and am about to get pumped and dumped by someone out of my leauge. But i will string you along, until i find out if the other guy is gonna hang around or not!"


This means that not only is she flirting with you she is also ****ing someone who she thinks has higher status than you and her current boyfriend combined. Trust me if it was going to happen it would have right then and there...
 

dtmssmfkdv

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Yeah Sayno, could be that. Don't know though, we were at her mom's house, so I think prevented me from getting the bang then and there.

I guess I'm just wondering if the "I don't want to hurt you" line is ever actually true, or if it's always a smokescreen. I don't get why she'd have her first makeout with me the same night she drops the I don't want to hurt you line...
 

El Payaso

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This is just a slightly different form of her ASD kicking in. Isolate her again and just keep pushing.
 

Skyline

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Personally, there's nothing wrong with your situation. Besides maybe some morale compasses regarding "stealing her away", but hey you're you- your choice.

That line she used is like her firing a gun- but with blanks in it. It's just meant to startle, daze, or confuse you. From which it's actually working since you've began to question yourself and your situation with her. Women will try and use logic to rationalize behavior that is emotionally driven, she finds you attractive but still has the logic to not betray her boyfriend. Even though she already has. This is why actions speak louder than words, especially when it comes to women.

Her actions clearly say she's interested in you more than her boyfriend at this point. So listen to those if you wish to maintain the situation. If you do, her boyfriend is most likely going to find out. So be prepared for an AFC confrontation. He'll probably want to fight you; he cried because he wasn't spending time with her- just remember that. I mean I'd be scared.

So basically do what you have been doing, you're fine. But if you don't think this isn't the case, then SAYNO already stated the other reason.
 

VladPatton

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SAYNO said:
I dont want to hurt you : "Im boinking someone else now, you are more emotionally invested in me than i am in you. Either that or i have vastly over rated myself and am about to get pumped and dumped by someone out of my leauge. But i will string you along, until i find out if the other guy is gonna hang around or not!"


This means that not only is she flirting with you she is also ****ing someone who she thinks has higher status than you and her current boyfriend combined. Trust me if it was going to happen it would have right then and there...

This is what I'm thinking. Waaay too much resistance. Girls that make you jump through hoops are never worth it in the end.
 

benogan

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"I dont want to hurt you" Look her in the eyes, hold. Hold. Laugh hysterically.
 
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