I don't want to blow this one!!!!!!!!

[quicktaurus]

Allright you DJ's. Here's the scenario:

I went to a female friends work for whatever reasons, and when I got there, she had two friends there with her. One was some dude, and the other was a totally fine HB. Me and the HB made instant eye contact, and I could tell there was an instant attraction. She spoke first and said that I looked familiar to which i replied that she did as well, knowing damn well that had I met her before, I would have remembered. I was kinda embearassed becuase I was wearing my work clothes, f'd up hair, unshaven, the whole bit. But she was still jockin! I made my f'd up appearance the center of the conversation in order to let her know that i dont just kick it like that by saying "you'll have to excuse the way i look because im still in my work clothes and havent been home to clean up yet, to which she replied "thats ok im still in my work out clothes". of course that gave me the go ahead to look her up and down!!! as i was scoping the "clothes", she puffed out her chest to make sure I saw those luscious breasts of hers!!!!!!!! Finally we determined that we had seen each other on a personals style website and she told me to add her as a friend. I thik i handled the situation pretty well. I purposely waited until today to add her as a friend to my profile following some of the advise on phone calling i found here. Good move right?

O.K., now here's the deal. she has alot of information listed on her profile about herself which is a real plus! (Im thinking trance words might be useful here? what else DJs?) she decribed what she looks for appearance wise for a man, and i fit the bill to a T! also, every other guy who leaves comments for her ALL JOCK HER. so i know i cant jock her if i want to be different. but im afraid to use neg hits because of how sprung SHE was when we met. (so was I, but i used my poker face and a little ****y funny and alot of projected self confidence and eluded to my above average income to mask it) i just dont want to blow this one because i could REALLY like her in the future.

Bottom line: I need to write her a first message that will impress her and solidify her interest in me the right way. i seem to be able to get to this point with women often, but then crash and burn when it goes beyond this point.

Share the love fellas!!! Thanks in advance for any help!!!

 

[quicktaurus]

O.K. I sent her a message and I kept it really simple. 4 short sentences. No compliments. The last was an open ended question based on something I remembered from the encounter. I didn't write a conclusion because i figured it would give her an "out" if it was "all wrapped up". This way I tried to make it to where it's mid conversation, and a reply from her would be natural. Now I will be able to tell if she is really interested if she not only replies, but askes me questions. I figure no questions, no interest. Right?

 

[cactus3178]

What'd you TXT her, just out of curiousity?

Seems like your off to a good start...

 

[Bill]

Get the digits then get a date; I'm not too fond of IM when it comes to "business".

Want to get something going? show her you got game. For that to happen, show you have balls and ask her on a date.

Also, don't put too much work into this one girl (that is, unless she's showing some seriously high IL).

Come back to us with a field report.

-Bill

 

[quicktaurus]

Originally posted by cactus3178
What'd you TXT her, just out of curiousity?

Seems like your off to a good start...

Here's what has transpired thus far:

From: ME
Date: Jan 4, 2006 10:54 PM

It was trippy that we recognized each other after having never spoken or met before. I think that's pretty damn cool, huh?

So you were wearing your work out clothes, eh? You workout here in town?

----------------------------------
From: HER
Date: Jan 5, 2006 1:37 AM

haha...very weird.
yeah at body works...
<3

----------------------------------
From: ME to HER

Body: You go girl, work, work, work that body!!! I used to lift weights there a few years back. Good ****.

Ya know what, I've got all sorts of fun and intersting things to ask you, and typing is for the birds (I mean I like birds [and bees!], but you know what I mean), so yadda give me your number so we can talk a little better. And besides, you have a cute voice! So I'll check back for it later.

xo

________________________

Pretty allright fellahs? Real talk is appreciated weither good or not.

Hey Bill, what is IL? I looked at the glossary and didn't see it.

Now I'm just waiting for her to send the number!

 

[Serialized3]

IL = interest level

Try not to put such an importance on her, when you start considering her as something really important you mess up your chances with her because you end up putting a higher value on her than yourself.

Just have confidence and go out there and follow your gut. Don't second guess anything. She obviously wants you, now just go out there and lead her, show her your masculinity, and take her back to your pad and tap that.

 

[tmpgstx]

Hey quickt - good luck with her but think you may have blown it. There are two things that i can see as a turnoff to a girl with a fairly straight head on her shoulders - the first

"It was trippy that we recognized each other after having never spoken or met before. I think that's pretty damn cool, huh?"

It's in the dating rules book for women that they should never date a guy that says or writes the word 'trippy'.

Just reading it from an outsider's perspective - you seem very eager (almost desparate) to get with her.

The other thing was the 'xo' at the end of your message. I'm thinking you mean this to be the cheek peck kiss. This isn't masculine but submissive and a bit weird for someone she's never even touched before yet.

Hope that helps - didn't mean to be harsh but constructive criticism will help you improve.

 

[quicktaurus]

Thanks you guys, I appreciate any and all advice and/or critisizms so long as its "real talk" (not some kid being an ass because he can type b.s., you guys know what im sayin.) as it will most definitely improve my game.
_________________

"Just reading it from an outsider's perspective - you seem very eager (almost desparate) to get with her. "

- tmpgstx
_________________

Im not desperate, but I am definitely excited about the possibilities. I've lost 47 pounds since September (238 to 191, 5'9" and muscular) and have about 20 or so left to go until i'm fatless. So needless to say I havent been hit on by a woman of this caliber in what seems to be a decade. My usual scoring average is about every 6 months i'll get some trim for varying lengths of time. And these arent grotesque fatties either though. Im too picky for that. but theyre not hotties either. Id rather get none than expend energies on ugly/fatties. also I feel if a hottie saw me with a fatty she'd think im gross and desperate and i could count them out. I live in a city of about 20,000 people so its pretty small.

3 different girlfreinds lived with me one after the other from 1989 to 1999, so i lost alot of game, (plus 80's game is out of style anyway) then when i became single, i was fat. its been the 6 mo average girl cycle ever since.

plus i was, until very recently learning, a horrible AFC, flowers before a date even, shower with compliments, etc. and a hopless romantic. Im trying to break away from that style and at least realize i have the problems and avoid doing that lame sh!t. but as you can see, the "xo" leaked out as i was tring to match her "<3". Bad move i guess.

 

[izza]

Originally posted by quicktaurus
but as you can see, the "xo" leaked out as i was tring to match her "<3". Bad move i guess.

LOL, yea, probably.

You know, it's not so much what you do, it's the underlying self-confidence that counts for a lot more. That's what gives the ring to your words - even on email. So don't worry so much about should I do this, should I do that - you don't need to worry about that anymore once you learn what it means to "be yourself" (which by the way is perfectly banal and meaningless - even misleading - to those who don't understand it yet). It comes with time.

In the meantime, yes, my brother you do sound a little desperate for this girl. It sounds like you don't want to wait another "six months." I wouldn't either. That's a sign that you need to work on meeting some more women in case this one doesn't work out, or for the women after her. Once you feel like you can get a date with a half-decent girl any week, that's where true confidence begins. Best of luck bro!

D

 

[quicktaurus]

No reply from her yet. Oh well. NEXT!!!

I accomplished a 2 minute convo with a female stranger today though. Not my type, but good practice!

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Originally posted by quicktaurus
No reply from her yet. Oh well. NEXT!!!

I accomplished a 2 minute convo with a female stranger today though. Not my type, but good practice!

Don't NEXT so quickly, especially when your waiting for a reply from a internet site. Its not like she knows EXACTLY when you messaged her, so give it a few days. Secondly, in the future # close right then and there, so you can avoid the secondary forms of communication (e-mail, myspace, IM). You mentioned wanted to separate yourself from the "herd" of doods that jock her and compliment her on her site, right? Well the best way to do that would have been to not communicate with her there, but # close and take her out!

I've never been a fan of internet communication. Its hard for the girl to tell when your being c/f, when your being serious and to top it off, they barely know you. So if you say something even the slightest bit offensive to them for whatever reason, they'll cut you off.


PIMP