I Dont Want To Be A Jerk Anymore!

[SPEAK]

Over the past six months since discovering this sight I have turned my life around and felt what its like to have confidence in yourself. I have handled myself amazingly with encounters with girls, hooked up with more than a few, way more than my previous record of 0. I also stand up for myself all time and have gotten into a few fights because of it, and won. Girls actually notice me now and are attracted to me for a while until I start hanging out with them for a while.

If I sound ****y in this post, that is exactly my problem. I read things on the DJ bible about "faking it until you make it" and thinking stuff like "I am the ****" all the time. I took this to heart, and now I have "made it." I am ****y and funny but more ****y I think. Girls sometimes get pissed off at me and the new me shrugs it off, but the old Nice Guy part of me thinks I am definitely doing something wrong.

I find writing this post extremely ironic because not too long ago I was reading about how to not be a Nice Guy and to get girls. Now I am trying to find out how to be nicer, haha.

Don't get me wrong I like this new me better than the person I was before because I have more friends and get way more attention from girls. However I know that I need to find the middle ground to be the best that I can be, and I just need ideas doing that.

Thank you

 

[888]

Method 1:

Just dial it back. I mean you've identified the issue, you know what you need to do (be nicer); like you said, its just a matter of hitting the sweet spot between nice guy and jerk.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Method 2:

You need to let girls see your vulnerable side every once in a while; it might be a good idea to get a few close female friends (that you don't want to ****) around whom you act like the most adorable, thoughtful, nice AFC guy ever -> this way, word will spread that underneath your gruff, jerky exterior lies a really sweet guy (awwwwwwwwwwwwwww).

And then you can continue to be ****y&funny without restraint. All the girls will think that they have you figured out, and will be more forgiving of your behavior. It will be a mistake on their part but it is something you can exploit.

*Whether or not you ACTUALLY are AFC on the inside is entirely up to you. You can be 100% assh*le, but if you manage to convince even one or two girls that you're really just a sweetie, then you're golden*


--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Method 1 (genuinely finding a medium between nice guy and jerk) is good if you want to go for longer, more committed relationships; no girl wants to actually date a jerk. Remember to be courteous, but not servantile (is that a word?). Be polite, be kind, but don't grovel.

Method 2 (making people believe you're nice on the inside, without actually changing your hardened personality at all) is better suited for getting non-committal hookups or short term f*ck buddies. Unless you actually ARE just a big softie on the inside, if you get into an actual relationship with a girl she will get tired of continually trying and failing to bring out the mushy AFC side of you. The trick is to lure them in with the thought that they can reform you, and then to get rid of them before they get a chance to discover that you don't actually have a soft side. Rinse and Repeat.

 

[Huffman]

You're afraid of being nice; afraid that you'll revert and lose your success.

Well here's a heads-up: you can have both. Now that you have eliminated most of your insecurities (i hope), just try for once to play it nice.

I personally found that you can get a lot of girls by being nice - in the right way. Nice, but not supplicating. Girls don't have to be your enemies.

 

[Cockynfunny]

Every girl is unique, just having one approach will not always work .

Girls notice you and are attracted to you, cnf can be amped down a bit.

Dont forget that the point of ****y and funny is to have fun an the same time show that you are not a pushover.

The best mind set to have is to do things you do because you want to do them and not to please girls.

Because in the long run when you get a gf and you are still that nice guy at heart, she will see through and crush your spirit so just be yourself - your CONFIDENT self.