I don't understand her intentions? Does she want me to chase her?

[A1234567]

So I asked this girl out at my bank a couple weeks ago after getting to kind of know her over the summer. Every time I would go in, we would talk about a lot of things in both of our lives such as interests, school, family, etc. I sensed interest so I gave her my number hoping she would at least text me. She did. She rejected me, though. She told me she would go out with me some time but she thinks it would be a "conflict of interest" for her to go out with a customer. She thinks people at her job would talk. I sensed it was just an excuse because (1) why would anyone there have to know? and (2) if she was interested, she would've jumped at the invitation. After I got that text I just sent her one back that said, "Yeah I understand. Thanks for texting me, though." I left it at that. I didn't contact her or go to the bank again.

Two weeks later, I get a text from her on my birthday saying, "Hey! I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! Have a great day " I hadn't had any contact with her in two weeks. I think it's really strange that a girl who has no interest in a guy and rejected his offer to go out would make sure to text him on his birthday when they aren't even good friends.

I finally went back to the bank yesterday just out of curiosity. We didn't discuss me asking her out but we talked about life again. Her eye contact always seems so interested. When I left the bank, I got into my car but I could see through the bank window. She was smiling and looking at my car and walked up to the banker girl and said something to her. Knowing women, I'm sure she made fun of me but I'm not certain of that. After that, I sent her a short text that said, "Just so you know, I wouldn't let anyone at your job know if we went out some time." She never responded.

I just don't get her. Is she playing hard to get or what? I was going to forget about her until she randomly texted me on my birthday.

 

[Tictac]

She's an attention wh*re.

What else do you need to know?

 

[sylvester the cat]

Two weeks later, I get a text from her on my birthday saying, "Hey! I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! Have a great day " .

http://ministry127.com/sites/default/files/Hook, Line, and Sinker (title).jpg

 

[Dreesy]

It sounds like your NC was getting her a little riled up, so she threw in a line to see what she could catch, and she managed to get you off your game. That last text you sent was unnecessary, you should have continued your NC and not have gone into the bank the day right after she texted you.

Go back to NC, and only contact her if she contacts you asking for a date.

 

[nismo-4]

Your princess is in another castle. Just in need of an attention fix. Don't respond unless you're cool with being a beta orbiter.

Case closed.

 

[Tiguere]

You should've been more persistent. Shee gave you a bs excuse... You still have a chance my friend...

Text her back... Say.. Hey...
Which evening are you free???
Then invite her out for an appetizer and drinks. Kino kino kino.. Go for kiss... Ask her back to your place.. Then fvck her right in the pvssy

 

[evertking]

Sucks you contacted her, you on her mind and that's good, if ya wanna bang it. But a better reply would have been nothing at all. Withdrawal and make her chase ya.

 

[christoff522]

So I asked this girl out at my bank a couple weeks ago after getting to kind of know her over the summer. Every time I would go in, we would talk about a lot of things in both of our lives such as interests, school, family, etc. I sensed interest so I gave her my number hoping she would at least text me. She did. She rejected me, though. She told me she would go out with me some time but she thinks it would be a "conflict of interest" for her to go out with a customer. She thinks people at her job would talk. I sensed it was just an excuse because (1) why would anyone there have to know? and (2) if she was interested, she would've jumped at the invitation. After I got that text I just sent her one back that said, "Yeah I understand. Thanks for texting me, though." I left it at that. I didn't contact her or go to the bank again.

Okay, she's an attention-wh0re. Bascially she mirrored all your interests to keep you interested, but had zero intention of getting with you. But she still enjoyed the attention (you were basically the work equivalent of a beta-orbiter.

Two weeks later, I get a text from her on my birthday saying, "Hey! I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! Have a great day " I hadn't had any contact with her in two weeks. I think it's really strange that a girl who has no interest in a guy and rejected his offer to go out would make sure to text him on his birthday when they aren't even good friends.

Well it does if you consider that she missed the attention, perhaps she wasn't getting any attention from anywhere. Or maybe she was simply being friendly.

I finally went back to the bank yesterday just out of curiosity. We didn't discuss me asking her out but we talked about life again. Her eye contact always seems so interested. When I left the bank, I got into my car but I could see through the bank window. She was smiling and looking at my car and walked up to the banker girl and said something to her. Knowing women, I'm sure she made fun of me but I'm not certain of that. After that, I sent her a short text that said, "Just so you know, I wouldn't let anyone at your job know if we went out some time." She never responded.

This sounds so desperate. Not only are you playing into her drama, you're giving her all the power. You should have left it, let the hamster spin in her head. After seeing you, perhaps you completely ignored her, she'd be left wondering if maybe you'd gone in there to see her, or perhaps you weren't bothered. It would have given YOU the power. If she had any interest she would have pursued you. However, she now probably perceives you as desperate, Remember, you currency is your attention, if you don't give it..it drives em crazy.

I just don't get her. Is she playing hard to get or what? I was going to forget about her until she randomly texted me on my birthday.

Theres no such thing as hard to get, theres interest or disinterest. If she's interested she'll let you know, if she's not you'll wrap it up and dramatize it in your head to make it "hard to get". Thats to protect your ego. She's a b!tch, attention-wh0re and thats all you need to know.

 

[Tictac]

Theres no such thing as hard to get, theres interest or disinterest. If she's interested she'll let you know, if she's not you'll wrap it up and dramatize it in your head to make it "hard to get". Thats to protect your ego. She's a b!tch, attention-wh0re and thats all you need to know.

You don't have to understand her intentions. You can't pull that off anyway.

All you can do is observe and respond to her behavior.

 

[betterthanbeer]

TicTac nailed it.

When you didn't text again or she didn't see you for 2 weeks, she began to go into attention-withdrawal and need a fix.

It happens to the best of us.

I wish you hadn't sent this though "Just so you know, I wouldn't let anyone at your job know if we went out some time."

It kinda smacks of begging. Oh well, carry on with your life, when you see her, treat her as an aqauaintance. Her loss.

Kinda???
Not begging...it was BEG/WHINING. Other than this slight modification, Mauser96 has it.

 

[Rival]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mctBMLUQdsg

^ pretty much this

Agree with the others,Not trying to bash you but for your text was bad and expected. (learn from the experience)

looks to me as she sees you as a friend and maybe was pulling your wires a little bit with the text.

Don't drop the bank but I'd be pretty cool with her when I saw her and see if anything happens (let her make any moves from here on out)

 

[VladPatton]

After the rejection, you should of been talking to her about nothing else but banking and why you were at the bank. You reject her back when you cut it short when she begins getting all cutesy and personal again with the dialogue. You just say "oh hey, I gotta run..later!"...and you do it all with a smile on your face, showing no sign of being butthurt. Of course by now you should of deleted her number.