I'm Right there.
I had a girl I went down to NC with, and she had a bf, but she Dumped him the day before, so. I picked her up about 30 miles away from my house, which is her house, lmao, and I drove 12 hrs. down to NC with her. we stayed at a hotel the first night, and She said she wanted the "Fuzzy" blankets, and I could have the "Scratchy" one. Well, we ended up sleeping in the same bed. And I kept trying to cuddle up with her, cause I mean, Its all about getting to her the first night so they know you're intrested. Well, I tried, and she said "Scoot over a little bit" , so, had no other choice but to. And about 3 a.m. I woke up unexpectedly with her getting out of bed, to the bathroom, and came back to bed, and I said "Everything okay?" cause my first assumption was that her ex calling her when he got off work.. But false alarm.. and I stayed awake til' she fell asleep, and I tried to cuddle with her, just trying so hard, cause I knew she needed someone to hold her that night, haha, she was feeling a little desperation.. So, she got a little closer when she came back to bed.. And.. told me to scoot over again.. there's strike two. So, I just scoot over to the maybe half inch room of my side of the bed, and she starts talking to me.. Like "Are you okay?" which I think was her asking me if I was alright with her sleeping in my bed.. and I said "Yeah , I'm fine." but it was the cutest thing cause she had the lightest sleep voice I've ever heard.. and she told me "if you need anything, just let me know, okay? ...... (Pause) Okay...?" lmao, "Okay. I'm alright now." But then she turned over to my side, and just looked into my eyes, idk why but I melted so much. Never have I accomplished so much in my life, haha. It was just awesome..
Well, the next day, she tried to slap me to wake me up, as a joke, but I moved out of the way, which means, I stayed up all night. and , we got dressed and got ready to go the other half way down to nc, which we were at Asheborough at the time.. So, yeh, got some breakfast from the main lobby, and went.
(4 hrs. Later)
We arrived, and I feel like a new man, cause mainly, I didn't like the ride over there, haha. she was the mainpoint of it all, I could care less about driving 12 hrs. But, my uncle and all the family meet us down there, and we buy condos for a week, Ocean Isle range.. and we always stop at the resturant which is my uncles favorite resturant.
Heres the deal..
We're all in ohio..
He goes down to NC and picks up the special made butter just how he likes it.. they make it for him. lmao.
But anyway, on our way in there, we spot a game machine.. It was a Nerve machine.. like stick your finger in the hole and it tells you your pulse..
Me and her Averaged about a 80.
And.. Then her bf calls, which I dont think they're over.. So I start to shake a little bit, tremble haha, And then I hear the words "I love you"
My mind goes blank... Never in my life have I felt so rejected..
I go up to that machine and It comes out to a 105.
Almost Fainted on my way over to the machine..
I mean, its not fair.. he cheated on her, and he gets so much action That in my lifetime I would never get out of her..
So, we head to the ocean..
But I'll sum it up ,
Cause a weeks worth is so long to tell,
She barely talked to me again..
And wasn't laughing with me, or telling me how she felt..
I felt neglected.. Like "What am I doing here?" and "Why is she the only way for me to enjoy this"
But it's true.. she was the only way..
Thats all I wanted that trip down..
Her to like me.
For me to hold her, would make me prolly choke on emotions.
I went to the ocean without her the last night, she was getting tired,
I took her ipod without her knowing it, and Just went down there,
Relaxed, Cried a couple tears, Cause It was over.
I wouldn't see her for about another 3-4 months..
I dont want to be another guy, but she says I am.
I told her how I felt when she finally broke up with her bf..
And She said "I can't open up to you... "
and i asked why.. and she said "Because I don't know you well enough"
Like all that fear inside of her not liking me, became a reality..
I keep telling myself "I'm done." cause I'm so tired of it. I never accomplish a girl to like me.. except the one stalker chick .. but she'll fall for anyone..
I dont get it. I have no clue what I'm doing wrong.
I dont want her to feel weird about me, so I back off a little bit,
But I dont want her to not like me, so I try to be a little more than a best friend.
)