I don't know if I am allowed, but I just wanted to vent. also wanted some experience as an opinion.

[nelysses]

I got close to a friend and we had a sexual encounter. After a while, she wanted to be my girlfriend, but I said I didn't want to. Even though I knew she loved me very much, she was toxic and I was unhappy.
Over time, she accepted it and said we should be friends again. But then she started telling me about other guys. She explicitly said we wouldn't talk if she was with someone else. Another friend of hers was in love with her.

In the end, I told her clearly that I didn't want to talk to her anymore. We said we wanted what happened between us to stay between us and ended it.

Even though I don't really care, I feel like my food has been taken away. I didn't want her, but I didn't want her to be with someone else either. It's a ridiculous situation. Honestly, I'm about a 5/10 and she was about an 8/10. Moving on isn't the problem, but it feels absurd that she finds someone new and I can't.

During this process, I gained a lot of weight, and frankly, I don't know how to flirt. She was just a girl who was impressed by my naturalness :d

 

[BPH]

Alright @nelysses , what kind of opinions were you looking for here?

What you're experiencing is the feeling of wanting what you can't have. Even if we break up with a woman, when we see her with somebody new, it still doesn't feel great, because it shows us that she was able to replicate what she had with you with somebody else.

What's important is what you do now.

You've been on the forum for a little under 3 years now. What have you done with it? You post, complaining about a problem that you're unwilling to solve, leave for a few months, then repeat. Each time you sound like you want to break the cycle, but only if it's convenient and easy enough - which it isn't. If it were, dudes would be getting laid every week rather than every month.

When I first started, I created a journal. It's incredibly cringe, but it kept me accountable to taking daily action - small steps - so that I had some sort of progress to post. But I was able to stay consistent, and over time, those small steps began to cover some real distance, until I became who I am today.

Some people come here for sympathy. Others come for solutions.

It's up to you which one you want to be.

 

[nelysses]

Alright @nelysses , what kind of opinions were you looking for here?

What you're experiencing is the feeling of wanting what you can't have. Even if we break up with a woman, when we see her with somebody new, it still doesn't feel great, because it shows us that she was able to replicate what she had with you with somebody else.

What's important is what you do now.

You've been on the forum for a little under 3 years now. What have you done with it? You post, complaining about a problem that you're unwilling to solve, leave for a few months, then repeat. Each time you sound like you want to break the cycle, but only if it's convenient and easy enough - which it isn't. If it were, dudes would be getting laid every week rather than every month.

When I first started, I created a journal. It's incredibly cringe, but it kept me accountable to taking daily action - small steps - so that I had some sort of progress to post. But I was able to stay consistent, and over time, those small steps began to cover some real distance, until I became who I am today.

Some people come here for sympathy. Others come for solutions.

It's up to you which one you want to be.

No opinion, bro. This time, like I said, I just wanted to vent. Because I'm using Translate, sometimes what I say is wrong and I don't notice. I just wanted to vent.

 

[nelysses]

Meanwhile, I've learned so much from this site during this process. And the biggest lesson I learned was taking action. Thank you. maybeI'm still not very good at flirting, or easily approaching girls. But at least I can take action now.

 

[zekko]

Moving on isn't the problem, but it feels absurd that she finds someone new and I can't.

I wouldn't feel too bad, 90% of the time the woman can find a new guy quicker and easier than vice versa.

 

[nelysses]

I wouldn't feel too bad, 90% of the time the woman can find a new guy quicker and easier than vice versa.

I know, I've experienced this before. It's just that, as I said, I felt like my food had been taken away from me.

 

[viking22]

Most guys don’t care if a girl is toxic (at least short term) if she’s attractive so not surprising she’s found other guys.

If you want to have high standards ie you want looks and good attitude/behaviour then you need to measure up as these girls get snapped up fast.