Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

"I don't give out my number to guys"

Ricky

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OK, first off how do you handle this situation

I met a girl, who gave me alot of rapport, in fact this was the second of 2 times I met her. My friend and his gf were around and when I went to close, she told me that.

I quickly said, "well give me your e-mail"

I haven't e-mailed her yet, and I'm not about to beg for her number in the e-mail when I do send it.

My thought is to make a joke out of it. I will turn it around on her. "Like, I know why you said you don't give out your number, it's because you were trying to trick me into giving you my number. Then the next thing you know, you'll be calling me 8 times a day and driving me crazy"

But this will sure make planning a date an issue. I don't like planning through e-mail. Believe me, I thought I had great rapport, but e-mail isn't the best sign.

I'm not against trying on this one. She was seriously a 10. My buddies jaw dropped. She talked to us for a good 30 minutes and the other time I had met her, she came up to me and talked for 15 to 20 also. So she has interest in me, but the level may not be as high as I'd like.

Any suggestions on the e-mail scene? I am thinking that I wont' ask for her number or a date in the first e-mail.
 

Tantric

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I'd email her...keep it light, but then tell her you're computer is going to be down for a few days and give her YOUR number. I usually don't recommend giving your number, but in this case, i think it's the only way to talk to her one-on-one.

if she doesn't respond, give it a few days or a week...then email her again to talk. If she doesn't respond then drop her.
 

cgraz

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Well you SETTLED for her email. You should've either gotten the number or walked off. Not that email is bad, it's just the fact that you settled for it.

How about:

You: What's your number?
Girl: I don't give my number out to guys
-------------------------------------------------

You: Oh. [pause]. I had no idea you were into girls... (turn your back on her)

You: Ok. It was nice meeting you (turn your back on her or walk away)

You: No worries. I think you're too much of a NICE girl for me anyways... (once again turn your back or walk away)

You: Most guys would probably beg you for your number right now [take a quick pause, look her dead in the eye] Well...have fun dating those same boring guys (walk away)

You: (really loud) No I won't have sex with you. Stop begging me; the answer is NO. :D

Anything c/f or neg hit (since you mentioned she was a 10 in your eyes). This girl is used to the attention, and it probably was a test to see what your reaction would be.

As far as the email, if you want to proceed, I think you have the right idea about making a joke about it. Maybe even emphasize you wanting to only be friends so she wonders why you're not interested in more. I haven't ever gone for an email, just numbers, so maybe somebody else would be of more help.

Cgraz
 

Mukester

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Though im sure youre a cool guy...Youre obviously still a lame ass in terms of pickup (though i agree with the above guys method).
Youre asking for the number too soon. You have to build attraction up with the girl before you #close...or you'll get responses like that.

And guys....email is f***ing l-a-m-e
 

Psycho`Sexual

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Originally posted by Mukester
Though im sure youre a cool guy...Youre obviously still a lame ass in terms of pickup (though i agree with the above guys method).
Youre asking for the number too soon. You have to build attraction up with the girl before you #close...or you'll get responses like that.

And guys....email is f***ing l-a-m-e
Ditto.



Why should she give you her number?

can you quote how the conversation went?


The key to number closing is to ask for a number when she is EXTREMELY excited, during the PEAK of the conversation, or maybe better still right BEFORE the peak.

That way she WANTS more! She WANTS for you to call, she WANTS that experience all over again, and she is going to be waiting for it all week long.

That is the strategy for the quick pick-up. You dont need to spend 30 mins on some woman....I think it would be rather boring to talk to someone for about 30 mins, and proof of the boredom is her "I dont give my number out to guys"

What kinda fvcking stupid lie is that?

What, is she 'grounded'? Is she a nun? Is she gay?

If not, then how the hell could she meet guys?


I would have said something like:

Girl: "I dont give my number out to guys."

DJ: "Oooh, thats interesting! So you're saying you're the type of girl who just wants sex, not necessarily the whole dating experience?" :D
 

Ricky

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She was actually working for this bar in town and handing out flyers, so of course everyone hits on her.

I had her there for a long time, being C+F and negging her. I had met her a few weeks back and she started talking to me for a while to.

But she said she had to go (hopefully cuz she was working only, if it was a regular girl that was off work, I definitely wouldn't have gone for the number with her having to go) and that's when I went for the number close.

E-mail isn't the preferred route, but I have taken a girl from meeting her, getting her business card (with work phone number only which of course I wasn't about to call since calling a chick at work doesn't offer the best chances for hitting on her), to e-mailing her casually for a while then f-closing her. So it can be done.

The fact that I had a crowd (my friend and his gf) for the whole convo this time (last time the convo was a bit more one on one), didn't help either. I couldn't run my best stuff on her.

The one thing that was great about it was, my friends gf had set me up with another chick that I f-closed the same night I met her. She was impressed with how hot this girl was and how well I did. This will only get me good press with her and her other friends. (I want her friend as a f buddy, but she wasn't going for it unless I break up with my current gf)
 

Ricky

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Sure enough e-mail isnt the way to go. It's been 5 days and no reply.

If I dont' here from her by next week, I might send one more.

But that's about it. So much for DJing a 10!!!

I knew the I don't give out my number was a seriously bad line even though she did flirt with me alot!
 

tomyv

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alskj

All of this is true. But I've actually gotten good responses from chicks who I gave my number, but wouldn't give me theres. THere are exceptions to every rule.
 

Amlothi

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I got this line not too long ago. Here's what happened:

Her: I don't give our my number. Why don't you give me yours?
Me: Why don't you give out your number? (Ignoring the request for my number completely)
Her: Because I'm a bartender.
{thinking...hmmm...we aren't in a bar so what does that have to do with anything? oh well, women are weird...}
Me: Oh, really? Where do you work?
{insert another 30-60 seconds of fluff talk}
Me: Well I'm not just some guy you'd meet in a bar, so you should just give me your number and make an exception.
Her: Umm... ok sure.


Sometimes I wonder if this isn't just another female test to see if you'll give in, or how interested you are and if you'll be persistant.

To finish the story, I called once and she wasn't home and didn't leave a message. By the time I called again it was atleast a week later, and when I got her on the phone I said "Hi, do you know who this is?" and she still remembered my name!

By the time we went out I was exhausted from work, so I wasn't in a terribly invigorating mood. We'll see what happens, but nothing clicked and I'm not planning on calling her anytime soon for another date. This is beside the point, simply to finish the story.
 

Jake Steed

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Ricky,

When you get the "I don't give my number out to guys", it means one of two things,

1. She has no interest in YOU.

OR

2. She may be interested in you, but she wants to artificially boost up her market value. For instance, she's so hard to get, she only gives out her number to very special guys, like Brad Pitt *rolls eyes*.

Because she was working in a bar handing out flyers, I'm going to go with option 1. Before you piss yourself trying to convince me otherwise, I will elaborate on why I know this is true, that she has no interest in you.

I KNOW lots of girls who work in clubs/bars, who do promotions. They get hit on by tons of guys. Even if you had something special about you, you are still one of hundreds of guys in line to hit on her. Your value enters the market at 0.

I myself promote for parties (hand out invites/flyers), so I know the best way to get girls to come is to flirt with them, make them feel special, then give them an "exclusive" pass to the party. I make them FEEL like they are special. Over the course of the night, I can hand out dozens of invites to dozens of girls. Do I care about any of them? No.

On top of that, from her point of view, you and she have NOTHING in common. You didn't meet in the kayaking section of the bookstore. You didn't meet through mutual friends, you didn't meet at your groundhog preservation society meeting, etc. For a girl who has lots of options (9's), she is looking for the serendipity connection--something she can tell her friends about on your 10 yr anniversary.

You, however, met her in a bar when she was working. From the female point of view, the bar/club carries the stigma of a trashy place where desperate guys pickup easy girls. Girls want to avoid this as much as possible. In order to make it happen, you have to have INCREDIBLE apparent market value (Brad Pitt), or the connection has to be truly incredible.

It looks like you've already struck out with her, so you've learned all this. Just remember to avoid the girls who work in bars and focus on the real girls who are out relaxing with their friends. At least they aren't getting PAID to flirt with you.

Jake
 

November1 2005

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Jesus, I first found this site like three years ago, and it helped me out way much then, like the days of Neanderthal Supersoldier, and Poet and others. But shhit, I was just reading the replies here, thinking I could help out on this score, and I think the advice has gotten even better. Fukking props dudes.

Anyways, the one thing that I think I could offer that maybe no one has is, Maybe don't even approach this 10.

Like here, check it out. People pointed out that she gets hit on ALL THE TIME. And also Jake Steed pointed out how the location didn't help in your favor either, Ricky. Plus, so many people are watching, that for her to give out her number, well, if she thinks super highly of herself, she might not even want to be seen doing so.

If you really want to nail a 10, I think the best way is for her to see that other 10s are into you.

I would say this. If I saw her and I was super into her, I might not even approach her, but instead I would come back like the next week with two hot 10s. That way you'll get her attention. Even better if these 10s are even hotter than she is.

Of course there's the issue of how you find two 10s to go back there with! And that's where this shhit just reaches the snowball kind of phase. It's like feast or famine, you know. If you got 10s you're fukking, then you can go into places with them, and then you'll get more 10s to fukk.

Because I fimly believe this: THE EASIEST WAY TO GET A GIRL INTERESTED IN YOU, IS FOR HER TO SEE THAT OTHER GIRLS ARE INTERESTED IN YOU.

Chicks are robotic and stupid this way.

So that's what I'd do.

I'd avoid her, don't approach, and go back with two 10s.

Also though, this tactic involes the idea that you ought to look at getting pusssy as a LONG-TERM goal. You want to build up a good reputation among woman, have them think that you're popular with women. Sometimes this means you sacrifice, like passing up this hot 10 in hopes of having a net to catch her with the next time you see her.

Eventually, if you work it right, and you're almost never seen APPROACHING women, but yet you have women all over you, two things will happen. First, dudes will approach you deferentially wanting to be cool with you, because of the chicks you get, and this will make you top dog. Second, chicks will begin to approach you. And once this happens, you almost never have to approach a chick again, unless maybe Heidi Klum or that Brazillian kum-burper doing those Victoria Secrets ads. Then privately you can approach them and split their lips....

--11125
 

Ricky

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Jake,

You are right. The proof is in the pudding, in that she didn't return my e-mail.

One thing that threw me was, this was at an event, not the bar itself and this was the 2nd time in a couple weeks she talked to me.

The first time I was quite laidback, and made a few observational comments. Our convo went very well and she asked me my name which is always a good sign anyways. We talked for 10 minutes or so that night.

The second time, she said I was acting 180 different. I was ****y and funny and it seemed to go over real well. My friend and his girlfriend were there.

In any event, I think as you said, there are too many guys (even though my style is probably better than most), the fact that she was working also hurts my chance.

No big deal, but as we talked about going out in her town, it would have been nice. I normally don't give waitresses, bartendresses or girls like her much of a second thought because I know it's a long shot, but they are still a good test audience for new styles and seduction methods.

Oh well she was close to a 10, I didn't score her, but I have had others that good before and will again in the future.

By the way, I think my laid back conversational style is working better than ****y and funny, which I seem to be overdoing. One thing is for damn sure, just getting a girl to laugh and even laugh alot is no guarantee of anything!

In fact in my history, I have always been able to get chicks to laugh. I think laughing in and of itself may make them feel good, but it isn't necessarily seductive!
 

princelydeeds

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Originally posted by Ricky
She was actually working for this bar in town and handing out flyers, so of course everyone hits on her.
When trying to get with a cutie who is working and is getting hit on constantly I tend to be all business. I act like im a VIP Like im the boss, I try to ignore that shes sexy but look straight in her eyes and speak like shes working for me. I try not to be an a$$hole but very commanding/demanding almost like im in a hurry.

I think that if shes been getting hit on every day all day you set yourself apart by not trying to flirt but by acting like the world is yours and shes a little beneath you. The point is that I want her to remeber me the next time I come into the place.

The next time I see her, if Im sure she remebers me, I try to be lighter and friendlier. Make a little small talk, see how she engages me. If shes open cool, if not right back to being the boss.

I played this role with both the hostess (HB 9.3) and a waitress(HB 9.5 half black/half Hawaiin chick with perfect t!ts) who worked at this restaurant near my old job. They both knew where I worked since they could see my badge, I would come in with a folder and open it up while I was eating. I would never even look at it while eating, it was just open. Most of the people from where I worked would come between 12&2. I would go after 2, when the restaurant was almost empty. After about 3 days of this the hostess, started asking me questions, of course I told her I was an accountant/manager at the time. Then the waitress got in on the convo I talked about how stressful the job was and how it was soooo hard manging people...lol. I boned the hostess within 2 weeks (she had a BF). It took me about a month to bone the waitress (she was engaged). :cool:
 

iqqi

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imagine...

imagine a world, where women approached men. they wanted the hottest guy, with the fattest pockets, and the biggest d!ck.

and you, more or less, fit that description.

here they come! can you see them? they are eyeing you from across the bar, they are grabbing your arm as they pass, they are blatantly eyeballing your "package", or your wad of cash as you pay the bartender for your drink. your drink, they are hoping you have alot of, so that you will be fcuked up and their chance of getting a piece of you will increase.

they really don't give a sh!t about your personality, or your humor. they'd prefer you just be quiet and pay. they don't give a sh!t that you are one cool mfcuker, intelligent as hell, and so much more than money and a big d!ck.

some of them get you. you spend all of your money on them, they tell their girls about your big d!ck, and you are in love with her. which you are. unfortunately. but then she gets bored with you. why?! i mean, you are a great @ss guy, all your real friends know it.

i mean, hey!, you know all her good traits! you fell in love with her, all her flaws, all her great attributes (she has alot of them! you know, because you cared to see them).

but and because she doesn't really care about anything else but the big d!ck and the cash. and the only thing better than your big d!ck and your cash, is new d!ck and new cash. so long.

all you want is someone you can relate to, who actually appreciates the fact that you are funny as hell, intelligent, and who can have a good discussion with you and actually care about the conversation. someone interesting.

you go back to the bars. the clubs. hell they are even at school, on the street as you walk with your friends. they are everywhere.

"here they come! can you see them? they are eyeing you from across the bar, they are grabbing your arm as they pass, they are blatantly eyeballing your "package", or your wad of cash..."

you give out your number to a few of them. they call. you go through the whole process again a few times, until you learn to be a little more picky. so you don't jump into anything right away. but as you try to get to know them, all they ask about you is "how much do you make?" "how big is it?, giggle giggle", about your last vacation to Miami...

are you depressed yet?

the chic who says "i don't give out my number to guys" is.
 

princelydeeds

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Re: imagine...

Originally posted by iqqi
imagine a world, where women approached men. they wanted the hottest guy, with the fattest pockets, and the biggest d!ck.

and you, more or less, fit that description.
How is this world any different from the world we live in now? Isn't that how women choose men now?

If a woman can have any guy she wants, and she ends up with "Jerks, badboys, and guys who dont respect her" it would appear to me that was what she was really looking for in the first place. Am I wrong?
 

iqqi

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Re: Re: imagine...

Originally posted by princelydeeds
How is this world any different from the world we live in now?
hmm...wonder what else is gonna go right over your head...

the difference is in the imaginary world i described roles are a little reversed. WOMEN are the ones that approach MEN. this is the big difference in this imaginary world. men are the ones that just "sit around looking pretty" just because they have big d!cks.

is it getting clearer...imagine...
 

princelydeeds

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Re: Re: Re: imagine...

Originally posted by iqqi
hmm...wonder what else is gonna go right over your head...

the difference is in the imaginary world i described roles are a little reversed. WOMEN are the ones that approach MEN. this is the big difference in this imaginary world. men are the ones that just "sit around looking pretty" just because they have big d!cks.

is it getting clearer...imagine...
In your imaginary world do the guys look past all the decent, kind genuine, AFC women and pick the worst possible women too?
 
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