"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

I could use some opinions on my current situation

Freshstatus

New Member
Joined
Feb 12, 2012
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Hey everyone!

This is my first post here. I am a long time reader and have lead a successful dating life. I would really appreciate some opinion's on my current situation as it is kinda strange. Here it goes, I apologize for the length...

This girl and I met while we on a two week study abroad program and we hit it off the first night of the program (she's 26 I'm 28). We had incredible chemistry and it was obvious. Anyway, she told me that she had a boyfriend (for a year and a half), and that she didnt want to put herself in a "dangerous" situation and we called it a night(LBF for the most part). I was disappointed but I dont like to chase women who are taken, so I was cool with it.

So we were "friends" and I started flirting with other girls and slept with one of them. Of course, when she found out, we hooked up the very next night. But she wouldnt have sex (to be honest I didnt want to either because I knew it would make her feel guilty). Anyway, fast forward, we hook up two more times, hang out all the time, and really build a connection. Through all this, she lets me know that her relationship with her boyfriend is coming to an end, and that she really likes me.

The program ended, and we have been texting/talking on the phone all the time for the past month (she lives 2 states away). She is coming out to visit me in a month, and she said that she is waiting for the right time to break up with her boyfriend. We have admitted our feelings for eachother, and it's been a lot of fun.

What do you all think? Are there any red flags here that my affection might be keeping me from seeing?

Thanks for your time! I hope some of you can share your thoughts.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

the_stig

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2010
Messages
466
Reaction score
56
Location
Central Time Zone
They all use the "I'll end it with the boyfriend soon when the time is right" line when in reality you're both just getting played. I wouldn't hold my breath on this one.
 

Freshstatus

New Member
Joined
Feb 12, 2012
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Yeah, you're right. Just gonna see where it goes, no expectations, and hit up other chicks in the meantime. Hard to keep a straight head when you really like the girl >.<
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,584
Reaction score
339
Age
36
Location
Atlanta
1. She won't break up with her boyfriend.
2. She loves the attention she is getting from both you and the boyfriend.
3. I hope you didn't kiss her :/
4. Seems like you don't have any other girls in your life if you find so much time for you to be textin/talking "all the time"
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Freshstatus

New Member
Joined
Feb 12, 2012
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
PrettyBoyAJ said:
1. She won't break up with her boyfriend.
2. She loves the attention she is getting from both you and the boyfriend.
3. I hope you didn't kiss her :/
4. Seems like you don't have any other girls in your life if you find so much time for you to be textin/talking "all the time"
Hmm interesting...

1. Perhaps, perhaps not
2. You're probably spot on.
3. I did kiss her... a lot. Could you elaborate on why you think this is bad? I dont get it.
4. Yes and no. For the most part yes.

Thanks for your input
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,584
Reaction score
339
Age
36
Location
Atlanta
She is just talking. She doesn't have any real intentions to break up with her dude. If she did then she would have been broke up with her. I'm saying I hope you didn't kiss her because I bet she be doming up her boyfriend all time. Kissing a girl like that is not the move.

and if you had more girls in your life you wouldn't be worried so much about this girl. So let me know. How many girls are you smashing?

Exactly...
 

Freshstatus

New Member
Joined
Feb 12, 2012
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
PrettyBoyAJ said:
She is just talking. She doesn't have any real intentions to break up with her dude. If she did then she would have been broke up with her. I'm saying I hope you didn't kiss her because I bet she be doming up her boyfriend all time. Kissing a girl like that is not the move.

and if you had more girls in your life you wouldn't be worried so much about this girl. So let me know. How many girls are you smashing?

Exactly...
Lol! Point taken.

I think you have the wrong context though. I'm not worried... at all. I just like her a lot; we have a great connection and a lot in common. It's a lot different then it is with most of the other girls I hook up with/date. I guess it can be it can be interpreted that I'm being AFCish or Beta or whatever, but I'm not. I think I just got a touch of oneitis.

I guess I'll see what happens when she comes out here in a month. She already bought the ticket. She has high IL, but she may flake, she is a woman.

Anyway, reading your replies has helped me to see the situation for what it is. Like I said above, I'm not going to invest, or expect anything, and start dating other girls. If she comes out here, breaks up with the BF, great! If not, well, plenty o' fish.

Thanks again.
 

st_99

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 20, 2006
Messages
1,783
Reaction score
59
this whole thing is dumb. it sounds like a couple of 15 year olds not 26 and 28.

tell her she should probably stay with her boyfriend like a good girl should.
 

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
Long distance relationships don't work. It is gonna fade real quick, and it is a red flag right out the gate that she was cheating with you on this dude, that ain't ltr material, she is doing that on him, she'll do it on you.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

HariPoter13

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 19, 2009
Messages
220
Reaction score
13
Age
41
Location
Dopaminergic pathways
Freshstatus said:
Anyway, she told me that she had a boyfriend (for a year and a half), and that she didnt want to put herself in a "dangerous" situation and we called it a night(LBF for the most part). I was disappointed but I dont like to chase women who are taken, so I was cool with it.

So we were "friends" and I started flirting with other girls and slept with one of them. Of course, when she found out, we hooked up the very next night.
Remember guys, let the kitty-cats play. Always.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
All hot women have boyfriends. If they lie about it to you, it's actually a good sign (lesser of two evils). The opposite extreme is when she randomly forces the 'b' word in out of context: "My boyfriend likes pizza".

They don't like to give up their boyfriend until they have a new boyfriend, so they overlap them (cheat).

Give it time. Don't expect them to become single just for a chance to be with you.
 
Last edited:

Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2003
Messages
2,457
Reaction score
101
Location
Pimpsylvania
Red flags everywhere.

This girl is only good for slamming and nothing else.

Especially since she's out of state.... your already catching one-itis and your going to get played HARD if you continue this...why are you torturing yourself and giving high value to a w=hore?





PIMP
 
Top